# Upset about giving up the kittens I have been caring for...



## Jessica4Bama (Aug 17, 2013)

I have been caring for some kittens since they were 4 weeks old (after their mother had to be put down). They are now 18 weeks old. I have had them fixed, and all their shots. I contacted a local no-kill shelter near me, and they had room to take them in. If they come back negative for FIV/FeLV then they will take them in for adoption. I am really sad about this. I know I cannot keep them, but it is hard giving them up. Three of them are all black so I hope they don't have a hard time finding homes. I am just worried about them adjusting to their new environment. I don't want them to feel like I abandoned them.


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## dt8thd (Jan 7, 2013)

Hi Jessica,

I'm sorry that you have to give up your babies; I foster as well, so I know how hard it can be to let go.  It's completely normal to feel guilty when it's time for a foster to move on, even if you know that you're doing the right thing. I have also worried about cats that I've fostered feeling abandoned by me. But, there's a reason why I can't keep all of the cats that I foster--if I did, I'd have 20+ cats, but, more to the point, I'd be doing both them and my own cats a disservice because I don't have the time, energy, or money to devote to more cats than I currently have. I want my fosters to have the best lives possible, but I have to remember that I'm not the only person who can provide that life--I'm not even necessarily the best choice, especially if I take on more than I can handle.

Do you think the shelter would let you visit them? It's not always a good idea to visit if you're extremely emotionally attached, but if you thought it might help to assuage your anxieties to just check in on them, is that something they might be amenable to? Maybe they would be willing to give you status updates on the kittens over the phone once a week instead? It doesn't hurt to ask if it will make you feel more comfortable with the whole process.


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## catloverami (Jul 5, 2010)

Can you not screen prospective owners yourself and sell them? Since they are already spayed/neutered and have had their shots, suggest you sell them for slightly below the price the shelter would charge. By selling them yourself, you likely will be able to do followups on their progress, and still be supportive and in contact with the owner, and may even be able to visit the kitten occasionally. Many of the owners who bought my kittens were very proud to keep me updated with photos and antics. I know black kittens can be somewhat harder to sell, but a jazzy name will help, and _good photos_....black cats are difficult to photograph, but have them on a contrasting bright (like red/blue fleece rug or throw) in bright light or flash (use redeye). Don't know about your black ones, but mine were mostly the sweetest and had the best personalities---play that up. Good luck, with whatever you decide.....and oh yes, black cats don't bring bad luck!


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## Marcia (Dec 26, 2010)

This is sad. You don't have many choices since you can't keep them. Give the shelter as much info as possible including a great write up about personalities. Nothing is more frustrating as a prospective adopter than to see a website with nothing more than "UTD on shots" listed for the cats. You could also try posting your own Craigslist postings with pics and descriptions. Direct people to the shelter if they are interested.


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## Jessica4Bama (Aug 17, 2013)

Thank you for the kind words. The mother had a litter of seven. My aunt took two of them, but I had the rest. I can only keep two inside my apartment. I just don't have the room for all these kittens as they are getting bigger. The only other option was adjust them to outside life, but I didn't want to do that because we live so close to a highway. Many animals have gotten hit and killed over the years so I don't want that to be their fate. 

I am taking them to The Greater Huntsville Humane Society, which is probably the biggest in that area. They try to adopt out over 1,000 animals a year. I will see if I can kinda keep tabs on them until they are adopted out.


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## love.my.cats (Jan 29, 2009)

This would be a really hard decision to make. I would check that the shelter us happy to keep them up for adoption until re-homed though, even if for whatever reason one might take a year if more to re-home. It won't be ideal for them to be there for that long but if no matter what, they get a loving home at the end if their stay, it'll be worth it in the end. 


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## Jessica4Bama (Aug 17, 2013)

Thank you for the message. I tried finding on and off before they were fixed, but nobody wanted one. I thought it would be easier to find them homes if they were fixed. This is my first time trying to find them homes so I didn't know how to do it. I didn't want to put them on Craigslist because you never know where they will end up. Someone at the spay/neuter clinic said I could call around to the different shelters to see if they had room. I just messaged the humane society on Facebook, and they had room. 

The black ones are funny. Two are males, and they get into everything. The female is a little bit laid back. I think the black ones are adorable. I named them Zorro, Swiffer, and Pixie.


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## Jessica4Bama (Aug 17, 2013)

Marcia said:


> This is sad. You don't have many choices since you can't keep them. Give the shelter as much info as possible including a great write up about personalities. Nothing is more frustrating as a prospective adopter than to see a website with nothing more than "UTD on shots" listed for the cats. You could also try posting your own Craigslist postings with pics and descriptions. Direct people to the shelter if they are interested.


Thank you. I will give them as much information as I can about them so it will help the process.


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## Jessica4Bama (Aug 17, 2013)

It is a hard decision, but I knew that I would eventually have to do something with them as I just don't have the room. I thought about adjusting them to outside life at my parent's house, but they live on a highway with lots of traffic. 

The shelter is a no kill shelter, and they do keep them how ever long until they are adopted. I saw a dog that had been there for 5 years, and it had just recently been adopted. I have been praying that their stay is short. I just worry because the majority are black.


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## 0ozma (Sep 22, 2012)

At the local small shelter I volunteer at, they have had a ton of black kitties lately. They have almost all gotten adopted now, it just took a *little* bit longer. Give the shelter a DETAILED write up on their personalities and they should have no problem finding a home with someone who isn't specifically looking for colors


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## Jessica4Bama (Aug 17, 2013)

What type of things would I need to say about them? They all get into everything. Haha. The boys are really rambunctious. They all like to jump on my counter after I have watched dishes, and lick the remaining water out of the sink. One of them likes to play with one of those rubber bracelets that are all the craze now. He will actually go fetch it. Hehe. It is funny. They are very playful and sweet. The female black one isn't as much. She is more of the loner type I believe, but it is hard to tell them apart now.


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## 0ozma (Sep 22, 2012)

I wouldn't write things about jumping on counters, but basic things like "Cat1 is very playful. Loves following you around the house, drinking from the faucet" and other things that they do like sitting on your lap, sleeping in your bed, loves to be held like a baby, nicknames that they respond to... whatever you can think of. 

Many people go in wanting to adopt basic things like "a cat that will take care of itself but keep me company" (one that doesn't constantly want attention). Or "a cat that will tolerate my young children" or "a cat that will want to cuddle".

For the female I wouldn't say "not very playful", but rather something like "Playful, but enjoys alone time". Often your description is the only thing people have to judge a cat on, and first impressions mean a lot. Think of it like a resume.


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## 0ozma (Sep 22, 2012)

Also if they get along with other cats, dogs, children. Too late to edit my post sorry.


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## Jessica4Bama (Aug 17, 2013)

I have a Maltese as well, and they don't mind her one bit. They all get along and play very well together. They chase each other and all that. It's quite funny. 

Thank you for the advice. It is Very helpful. In a few hours, I will be on my way to take them. I hope I don't cry on the way.


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## 0ozma (Sep 22, 2012)

Be strong! They will get a great home and make someone very happy 

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## Venusworld21 (Oct 23, 2012)

Jessica4Bama said:


> What type of things would I need to say about them? They all get into everything. Haha. The boys are really rambunctious. They all like to jump on my counter after I have watched dishes, and lick the remaining water out of the sink. One of them likes to play with one of those rubber bracelets that are all the craze now. He will actually go fetch it. Hehe. It is funny. They are very playful and sweet. The female black one isn't as much. She is more of the loner type I believe, but it is hard to tell them apart now.



Try looking at this:

http://www.catforum.com/forum/51-cats-need/166578-tips-tricks-write-ad-your-fosters.html


Hopefully that will help a little bit with doing write ups.


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## Jessica4Bama (Aug 17, 2013)

Thank you all so much for the support. We dropped them off earlier today, and all of them came back negative on the test so that was good. We got to say our goodbyes, but I did better than I expected. I cried more on the way than I did at the shelter. I felt better once I went in, and started talking with everyone. We got to look in the cat room so technically I could visit again if I wanted to. You just have to sign in each time to go visit the animals. They asked about their behavior and everything on the surrender form so everything went smoothly. I'm still upset, but I will get through it.

The only probably was the lady that I gave the vac records to asked me "you didn't get them tested." I said no, the lady said y'all would do it before you took them in. She said but you have already had them vaccinated. They are going to test positive. I said no, my vet doesn't give the vaccine that makes them test false positive because it isn't very effective. They just got their leukemia shot and distemper and rabies. She acted surprised, but anyway they all came back negative.


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## Jessica4Bama (Aug 17, 2013)

I was also told they get adopted quickly and that all black kitties do well also so that made me feel better.


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## Jessica4Bama (Aug 17, 2013)

I am struggling. I didn't know I would be this emotional or upset about this. It is so quite around here. I miss them so much. The two I was able to keep are not playing and not eating a lot. They are as sad as I am, and I even had thoughts about going back to get them even if they charged me, but I know this isn't really realistic.


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## 0ozma (Sep 22, 2012)

Can you potentially foster? Other than that as I'm sure you know, time will make it easier  maybe go visit them! I'm sure theyll be happy to see you 

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## Venusworld21 (Oct 23, 2012)

I am very surprised that with two still left, your house is so quiet. I'm sure they'll take care of that soon.  I don't think I read carefully enough to know what date the shots were done, but if they were recent, and/or multiple shots in the same day, that can sometimes make them a little lethargic for a day or two. It may be unrelated to their siblings being gone.


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## Catlover Danielle (Jul 31, 2013)

Aw, this totally bums me out! I understand completely. I am a foster mom and have been fostering for over a year now and it's been hard sometimes to give up my kitties, especially after you nurse them and watch them grow infront of you. 

I know you've already given them to the shelter - and I am hoping that works out, but it's too bad you couldn't have offered to foster for the shelter. I would've just posted a craigslist ad, but you would have to make sure you screen the potential adopters [meaning check their personal AND vet references, do a home check, etc] I would have them fill out an application [which you could ask a shelter for an application, or look them up online] and also make them pay an adoption fee so you know the people are serious. It's very much doable. :] They'd be worth the extra work. I wish I was close, I would've totally helped you out, I like doing those types of things, too!

Either way - you did a wonderful job bringing them up and seriously great job! You're a wonderful person! <3 I hope you're holding up okay!


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