# New Member with Cat problems - Help Please



## Shilding (Sep 9, 2010)

I am a worried cat-momma
　
I got a tiny calico kitty from the pound when my daughter was 6 years old (11 yrs ago) She was so tiny that they told me she would not make it. After begging they gave her to me to raise and at no charge since they honestly felt she would not make it and should be put down. But my little girl wanted a kitty and I wanted to rescue one.. She had to be fed with a syringe. I kept her in a little shoe box and fed her kitten milk from a syringe for weeks and she soon became stronger. I nursed her as if she were another child to me because there was no way I was going to let my daughter see an animal die. My determination gave this cat a second chance and it was one of the best highlights of my life. She became Jewelie at (Aka ***** kitty due to how mean she was to people) Soon she started showing her calico personality. She even attacks anyone who sings Jingle Bells. Not sure why but she is like the grinch at Xmas and we love her dearly!
When Calico kitty (Jewelie) was 5 years old I introduced Half cat - a rescue kitty that weighed 25 pounds, had one eye, one ear and was well to be blunt - retarded. Half cat was part of a rescue program and was found behind an elegant diner - seems even with all his disabilities he was getting well fed. Overly fed J He wiggled his lopsided way into my heart and became a wonderful little gentleman. She never seemed to like him at all until they got the midnight crazies together but maybe she did secretly love him. Hard to tell with her. She hates cat people, loves dog people and other strange men. She is also fixed (was the condition if she survived form the pound). Jewelie has only been overly affectionate with one person - my daughter. She doted on the kid. But not anymore. 
Also she has always been an inside kitty. 
The Recent Events & Changes to Jewelies World:
- 5 years ago I met and married a French man. We moved from North Carolina to Colorado. 

- 4 Years ago my daughter (Her other mommy who she followed everywhere) went off to college
- 3 years ago we bought a Pembroke Welsh Corgi. This is our other baby and gets a lot of our attention which Jewelie never minded because she has never been an affectionate kitty to begin with. I still gave her what we called *Forced Lovies*, pick her up, cuddle her and love on her while telling her how pretty and deadly of a hunter she is. She likes to complain about it but sits there and pretends to tolerate it. Secretly I think she liked it. 
- Two years ago we had to put half cat down. My little gentleman lived a great life with me and we had a wonderful few years. I was in the hospital having surgery when my husband had to put Half cat down. To this day I still get choked up thinking about him but I know in my heart he is in a place now where he is whole and happy. Waiting for me at the rainbow gate. 
- The past year Jewelie suddenly has become overly affectionate to me. It is like she realizes now that I was the one who nursed her when she was a kitten and dying. That she always rode with me when we traveled across the united states. 

The problem
She is all over me. I do not get a moments break. She has to sleep at my side, sit in my lap and follow me everywhere. If I don’t look at her she whines until I do. If I go to bed and she is not with me she cries downstairs until I call her to my side. It is like she panics if she cannot find me. More like an obsession. Now I love her, do not get me wrong, and I will hold her but she seems to want to be held tight. I mean in a death grip kind of tight and purrs the entire time when I do that as if she is terrified I would let her go. If I do not hold her tight enough she bites me until my arms go tighter around her. 
So please if anyone can help me understand what is going on I would appreciate it. She is my first real cat (others were fosters and Half-cat only lived 4 years with us). I want to understand what is happening so that I can help her adjust and make her more secure. 
Thank you in advance.


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## katlover13 (Apr 15, 2008)

What lucky cats that you took them in when nobody else would. Sounds like you gave Half Cat a wonderful life and I'm sorry you lost him.

How strange that Jewelie has done such a complete about face! I'm sorry I don't have any advise for you. My Juno was a crabby cat like that and has changed quite a bit, but is mostly because she has gotten more love then she can handle for the past two years.


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## April0684 (Sep 5, 2010)

How wonderful of you to take on jewelie and half cat!

I could be wrong but my best guess would be that jewelie has started becoming very attached because she is feeling the loss of your daughter no longer being there everyday who was like a mom to her and with half cat passing as well. Maybe she is afraid that you will disappear in a sense as they did so she is clinging to you more now.


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## teasha (Aug 15, 2010)

April0684 said:


> How wonderful of you to take on jewelie and half cat!
> 
> I could be wrong but my best guess would be that jewelie has started becoming very attached because she is feeling the loss of your daughter no longer being there everyday who was like a mom to her and with half cat passing as well. Maybe she is afraid that you will disappear in a sense as they did so she is clinging to you more now.


I was thinking the same thing. Cats don't do well with change, especially older cats. I wonder if a new kitty friend might help? Hard to say though, but just a thought.


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

I agree with April. She "needs somebody to love," someone she trusts. I think she feels the loss of Halfcat and your daughter. I've heard this called "the pathetic fallacy," that is describing human emotions in an animal. But I think that belief is a fallacy itself. Animals do love, trust, and sometimes cling to people or other cats, just as we do.


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## Itsmeorthecat (Sep 9, 2010)

Everyone one is 100% correct. She is clinging to you, because she feels that your all that she has left. She's scared of losing you too.


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## kwarendorf (Oct 12, 2009)

She is dealing with the loss of two big parts of her life. My GF lost one of her two cats in January. The other cat walked around wailing for six months. Then my GF got Daisy and we haven't heard a peep from Sammy since


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## mimitabby (Apr 20, 2010)

you need another boy kitty. good luck.


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## candes (Sep 10, 2010)

Maybe kitty dementia? Forgot she was a meanie?  Jus kiddin...

From my experience, all kitties get sweeter with age. 

She may also be happier without another (half) kitty sharing your attention. 

It sounds like your daughter was her best friend, and left. Now you are her new best friend.

It is a good possibility that all of the above come into play. 

Considering her attachment to you, a new kitty could cause her feelings to get hurt pretty badly. She will live, but will get stressed.


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## Shilding (Sep 9, 2010)

Thank you all for the sweet comments. Half-cat was my boy and his loss is felt everyday.

I was never a cat person until these two came into my life. We also have a corgi puppy who is daddys boy and an attention hound. My jewelie girl has become so settled now it is funny. She really is loving like never before so I am just going to eat this up for all its worth.


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## catloverami (Jul 5, 2010)

*Why not a Snugli or backpack?*

Sometimes cats do a flip flop like that. Well you wanted a snuggly cat, and now you have one! but seems she's over the top and a pest at times and it's hard for you to get things done. A solution might be to give in to her by putting her in one of those Snugli baby carriers, or a backpack. It would likely satisfy her need to be close to you, but give you free hands to get things done.


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## Annabelle (Oct 12, 2010)

April0684 said:


> How wonderful of you to take on jewelie and half cat!
> 
> I could be wrong but my best guess would be that jewelie has started becoming very attached because she is feeling the loss of your daughter no longer being there everyday who was like a mom to her and with half cat passing as well. Maybe she is afraid that you will disappear in a sense as they did so she is clinging to you more now.



I agree with this one. When my cat daisy disappeared, my dog became very depressed. He no longer had anyone to chase and play with.

When I adopted a new kitty from the humane society, they told me that pets grieve just like people! what a concept, I had no idea. So I spoiled the dog rotten and soon he warmed up to the new cat.


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