# I don't think I've ever cried this much.



## SpicySplendor (Aug 10, 2010)

Today, I lost one of my best friends, my 8 1/2 year old Spice, to a battle with something we didn't even know she had. 

Yesterday I thought she had a simple cold, and I took care of her all day...I didn't really sleep last night because I was worried about her, even though we already had a vet appointment for today. Fast forward to about 3 hours ago, and I was given the crushing news that my little baby had chronic kidney disease. I knew then she was pretty much past the point of no return, and anything we did at that point would be too costly, and only put her through more stress and pain sheerly for my selfishness - I wouldn't even be around enough to see her for it to be worth it, as I'm off to college in a few days and won't be able to come home much.. I felt like the only thing I could do for her was to end her suffering, and we did just that. 

I'm an easy crier, but for some reason deaths don't really affect me that much, unless they're fictional. {I know, it's weird.} I did cry a lot when my grandmother died a few years ago, but never have I cried more than this. Spice wasn't exactly a people-cat, but hearing her meow when I'd pet her and having her purring right next to my ear one time not too terribly long ago are special memories, as is the memory of coming home every day afterschool and getting to pick my tiny little kitten out from her brother and sisters to hold for a few minutes when she was little. I truly do miss my little Spicy-boo. ♥


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## Julie Carvill (Jun 30, 2010)

*hugs* I just put my cat Buster down a few hours ago.


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## SpicySplendor (Aug 10, 2010)

JulieC said:


> *hugs* I just put my cat Buster down a few hours ago.


*hugs back* This day is probably the worst day of my life, honestly. Everyone keeps asking if I want anything, and all I can tell them is that I want my baby back. :'( What was wrong with Buster, if you don't mind my asking?


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## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

Oh no! I feel as if I had just read about how she was a little 'off' and you were taking her to the vet! (((hugs))) for you. _I've also lost a kitty that I wasn't expecting to lose and I know how hard that is to come to terms with._
I am so sorry.
heidi =^..^=


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## kittywitty (Jun 19, 2010)

Please accept my condolences. Sometimes losing a pet is a lot harder than we expect. I put my Pumpkin Patch to sleep in March of this year and I still cry about it. She was a very special cat and I will treasure the memories always. Again, so sorry for your loss.


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## swimkris (Jul 17, 2010)

I'm so sorry!- Hopefully going off to college in a few days will help to take your mind off things.


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## Kobster (Feb 1, 2007)

I'm so sorry to hear about Spice. My heart goes out to you.


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## LilRed (Jul 16, 2008)

I'm so sorry. Its especially difficult when they are taken from us so quickly and so young. I think you did the right thing by her, not letting her suffer. And I'm glad you got to spend her last days with her too.


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