# Are we too caring?



## DaveMB (Jan 9, 2014)

Ok strange question, But do we put ourselves out *too much* for the sake of our cats comfort?

The reason I ask is I just purchased a La-Z-Boy electric recliner for £600 (around $1000 USD) and as soon as Gizmo saw it he gave me his "no stupid human - tis mine now" look and promptly jumped in and curled up.

I didn't have the heart to turf him out (while he recovering) but it just got me to wondering about all of the times I have sacrificed my own comfort for his benefit.

I've lost count of the amount of times I have gone to bed only to find him stretched out right across the middle and I have had to slide my self in down the side of him so as not to disturb him.

Should I be asserting my dominance more (serious question), Is it just me being to soft or is it a common issue for other cat owners also?

Or has Gizmo just acquired a very expensive cat bed :lol:


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## zuma (Nov 5, 2009)

I don't know what we *should* be doing, but I can tell you I'm the same. If she's snoozing on my lap I don't get up, if she's in the middle of the bed I'm in a tiny corner on the side, if she kneads on a full bladder I stick it out, etc. Heck I even got over my aversion of handling raw meat, so madam has the best food. I'm totally whipped. 


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## cat face (Apr 4, 2013)

LMBO!!! That's hilarious! But I do understand d your position. If you want to sit in that spot, you are going to have to take a deep breath and tell Gizmo to move.
I have to do it to B.B., but this scenario has happened so often between her and I over the years, all I have to do is say, "C'mon, Beebz, get up" and stand over her while I am saying it. She will jump down, without a gripe. She USE to gripe, big time! I would be fussed out, even swatted at, but I had to stand my ground, and it paid off.
Now, she jumps off my chair, and after I settle in, she'll jump up on the foot/leg rest and curl up between my calfs.


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## librarychick (May 25, 2008)

DaveMB said:


> Ok strange question, But do we put ourselves out *too much* for the sake of our cats comfort?
> 
> The reason I ask is I just purchased a La-Z-Boy electric recliner for £600 (around $1000 USD) and as soon as Gizmo saw it he gave me his "no stupid human - tis mine now" look and promptly jumped in and curled up.
> 
> ...


TBH I feel like if you have an animal that's ill or hurt it's fair to be more gentle with them and give them a bit of extra special things. For example, when Jitzu feels really really crappy she gets things like lightly cooked salmon for dinner. *shrugs* She also gets her favorite spot of the couch (read: my spot).

When my pets are perfectly healthy I have set boundaries, if I want to sit in my spot they have to move...but they can come sit on me instead. That being said, if I'm just going to sit for a second I'll sit in another spot rather than disturb sleeping kitties.



DaveMB said:


> Should I be asserting my dominance more (serious question), Is it just me being to soft or is it a common issue for other cat owners also?


Dominance in cats (and most animals) doesn't work ANYTHING like what we think it does. If you'd like do an internet search for 'dominance myth' and you'll find a wealth of articles by many many people (many of whom are certified behaviorists (PhD), or vets, behavioral vets, ect) who have actually done research into how hierarchies work in different species.

Bottom line? You aren't a cat, and your cat knows that. Don't try to pretend you're a cat.

IMO it's VERY hard to be 'too soft'. Unless your cat is literally making you bleed on a regular basis (without you provoking them either on purpose or by accident) it's not even a problem.

So, in short, my answer is: You're doing just fine. Continue happily pampering your kitty...but move him if you really want the new seat


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## Jetlaya67 (Sep 26, 2012)

I do the same thing. It does not bother me. They give me so much happiness that I don't begrudge them when they snooze on my chair. Of course my husband thinks I am silly by giving up my seat but I don't care.


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## thesmu (Jan 17, 2014)

I'm exactly the same 
Especially at night - my cat is huge and he's a total bed hog 


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## maggie23 (Mar 10, 2012)

oh, you are definitely not alone, DaveMB! all my catloving friends know that our cats rule. it's what being a cat slave is all about. if the cat is on your lap and you live with another human, the other human should know that you are trapped for a good 4 hours at least. that other human should be running your errands, getting you food and drink, bringing you the remote, etc...it's only when you just HAVE to get up to go to the bathroom that you can get up yourself.

i have suffered many a cramp in my arm in the middle of the night because angel has decided to use it as a pillow and i can't possibly disturb her slumber by moving it! the list of my sacrifices is endless...

i know all about losing a new recliner to a cat, too!


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## Yuki'sMum (Dec 3, 2012)

I'm the same  lol. I go to great lengths to not disturb Yuki if she's comfy or sleeping. I think this is pretty accurate!:










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## DaveMB (Jan 9, 2014)

Yuki'sMum said:


> I'm the same  lol. I go to great lengths to not disturb Yuki if she's comfy or sleeping. I think this is pretty accurate!:
> 
> View attachment 45330
> 
> ...



:lol: yeah, that looks about right.


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## MowMow (Nov 6, 2010)

I will admit that I'm completely unfair. If MowMow is in my spot (on bed or couch) I'll work around him. If Book is there, he gets moved. THe main reason (I will admit, not the ONLY reason) is that Book deals with it better. I'll shove him over and he just goes limp and settled where I move him too. MowMow gets all pissy and huffy and stalks off if I move him.

If someone is sick, they get the full treatment (both cats). The best spot, the softest blanket, the better food, and everyone else has to be quiet around them. No one is allowed to bug them.


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## ownedby4cats (Jan 23, 2012)

This thread is so funny! When it was time to get my husbands new recliner, it was very funny to watch him sit in a chair at a store and use his hands to decide if it was going to be big enough for him and Bandit. He did this at every store we went to and he finally settled on a huge recliner that sits him, Bandit either on his lap or beside him, a cat can have an arm, the back, etc. Actually that recliner will hold him and all 4 cats! And our antique oak sofa has 3 cat beds, I get the computer chair! HA


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