# Bobby the stray cat has adopted us



## katdad (Jun 13, 2013)

There’s a fine book, “A Cat is Watching You”, sadly out of print, but worth looking for in used bookstores. It tells of how clans of stray cats “adopted” their human pals.

It seems true, doesn’t it, that cats will search you out if you’re a “cat person” and find you? What’s your experience in that?

Anyway, my girlfriend & I live in a fairly upscale neartown area of Houston, “Montrose”, with lots of townhomes and apartments, active nightlife, great for adults. We share my big old “RJ” (age 19 and still going strong), a huge fuzzy orange cat. And being apartment dwellers, we don’t consider it reasonable to have several cats, despite our love for them.

Being in a heavily urban setting doesn’t deter feral life, as we get regular night visits from possums and raccoons, plus of course cats. This summer, a small family (I think they are all related) of strays began to visit us evenings as we sat on our patio. Whether stray cats sniff out a resident cat, such as RJ’s being outside on the small lawn, or whether strays have a secret newsletter that alerts them to “soft touches” I don’t know but these cats began to encircle us for treats.

Some were very shy but this particular little male kitten was bold, and would come close to us so we could toss a treat. My girlfriend named him Bobby. He’s a gorgeous shorthair grey. Eventually, Bobby would come to us and we could then pet him. So my girlfriend began to feed the whole “family” or 4-5, including Bobby.

Bobby is extremely friendly and gentle, and when meeting RJ on the patio was deferential. RJ’s a very peaceful cat anyway.

Well, we had a cold snap here in Houston the last few nights. For Houston, “cold” means 25F which is a joke for other areas but still it’s hard on small animals. Earlier, my girlfriend had set out a box w. towels for Bobby to sleep in. Bobby had begun to stay around our front door and not come and go like his family. He’d made the decision on his own to be near his human pals rather than cats.

But the low forecast was 22F and that was too much. So we brought Bobby inside, fixed him a bed and catbox in a corner of the living room, away from RJ’s bed, and fed them separately.

Bobby hid under a low sofa for several hours but then he came out, and we petted him and he stayed out and near us, getting attention and lots of smooth talk. RJ was also good with him and they got along nicely.

Bobby has been with us 3 days but with the warmer weather, he will be put outside soon. However, I think that he has adopted us, and so we’ll probably move him in soon, take him for a bath, shots, and eventually neutering.

Do you find that cats adopt you, instead of the other way around?

Any recommendations for adopting a very friendly feral cat? Suggestions? Thanks.


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## tezster (Jun 4, 2013)

Thanks for the book recommendation - it sounds like something I would enjoy reading. I'll have to look out for it 

I don't have any suggestions regarding 'adopting' Bobby, but it sounds to me like you're headed in the right direction.



> Do you find that cats adopt you, instead of the other way around?


This is an easy question for me to answer, since it's exactly what happened in my case: a stray simply walked into my home, and plopped herself down in the middle of my living room one night, and that was it. That same evening, she hopped onto my bed of her own accord and slept right beside me. As you can imagine, I'm pretty attached to her


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## pkbshrew (Feb 13, 2013)

You have been chosen by a very wise little cat. RJ sounds like an absolute gem as well. The only thing I would do if I were you is keep him in straight away - why wait? He has successfully integrated himself into yours and RJ's lives - what a clever wee kitten!


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## howsefrau32 (Mar 6, 2013)

I have three cats, all strays, and they all found me. The first one, Beep, 10 years ago, on a cold February night. 5 years later, Taffy, a little male was in my back yard, just laying, kind of lifeless and depressed in the rain. The third one, we found alittle over a year ago, howling like a mad man in the woods behind the place I worked. They all found us, every one of them, and I love them like they were my own babies 

Sounds like Bobby has definitely found you and he would LOVE to be your cat. I wish you would please consider getting him neutered before letting him back outside. I know with Houston being a big city, I guarantee there are many places near you that will do a quick, easy, cheap neuter and shots. I just googled Houston low cost spay neuter and lots of things came up, so please look into this. If you let him out before neutering him, you might not get him back. I'm not sure how old he is, but you don't want him increasing the strays around your area, plus all the problems that intact males have with other cats, fights, etc. Even if you don't end up keeping him, if he is neutered, he will be much easier to find a home for. 

I'm really hoping you will consider keeping him. I always believe that they find us. That has been the story with my three, and each of their stories is special and it was clear, very early on, that they were just meant to be with me. I have not kept every stray that came along, but when it became clear that I had been "adopted" by them, what could I do? I had to keep them. 

Please consider at least getting him neutered before letting him out. There are places here in Orlando, where I live, that have low cost mobile clinics, and Pet supermarkets and Petcos frequently do low cost shots. 

Good luck with him. Thanks for keeping him out of the bitter cold. I'm in Florida, and I understand what you mean by our version of cold is not what the north experience, but it's still really cold and the animals are not at all used to those kind of temps.


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## Dicesmom (Feb 28, 2012)

Yup I have been adopted by Smokey. He's supposed to be a foster and after his neuter j was going to find him a home but his neuter,due to weather has been pushed way back and well,who knows what will happen. But yes the cats pick you.

Sent from Petguide.com Free App


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## Jetlaya67 (Sep 26, 2012)

Bobbie sounds like a wonderful little guy, of course so does RJ. Yes, you have been chosen! I just think it is amazing how cats can sense who will be their owner. I don't know if they can sense kindness, a good provider or what but it is a very special thing that a feral or semi feral animal will give you that kind of trust. I think you guys are very special to little Bobbie.


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## katdad (Jun 13, 2013)

Girlfriend and I talked and decided to adopt Bobby. My principal concern is still whether he will tend to shove RJ around (RJ is 19 and sedate and has his own schedule, and loves me, and stays by me a lot). The other night, for example, I was snoozing on the bed (gf was watching late TV) and RJ as per usual got onto the bed next to me. Then along comes Bobby to snuggle and RJ was a bit hurt, as he's not used to sharing attention nor should he be forced to do so at his age. Last night however Bobby found a remote spot at the foot of the bed to snooze and RJ had the snuggle zone.

This is always a problem, adopting a new young cat in a house where older cats are in charge and used to being the focus. I will need to ensure that Bobby learns to defer to RJ because if RJ thought that Bobby was usurping his role as my total buddy, it would break his heart, something I won't allow.

Otherwise Bobby and RJ get along fine, don't compete for food and don't fight. So Bobby goes to the vet next week for his fixing into a home life instead of feral. He's a very well behaved young cat, amazing for a stray, and absolutely fine. After he learns that RJ is boss with my affections, that will be the only problem. So I have to be gentle with Bobby, shooing him away when he wants to push RJ away from the bed snuggle spot, not making Bobby feel bad either. That will take a little time but it can be done.


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## katdad (Jun 13, 2013)

Interesting side story... girlfriend was out front of the apartment having a smoke last night (it's still chilly here, 34F) but we're on a popular residential street with plenty of dog walking traffic. A man was walking his dog past, and he spoke to my gf...

He said that he'd been concerned the last few days of our cold spell, about the little grey cat. He told my gf that the cat was one of 2 born from a feral/stray mom just next door where he lives, 3 blocks away. And that a few of the young cat "herd" associated with that area had relocated to our apartment, in that we'd been feeding the strays.

So he'd seen the little grey cat get larger and he was happy the cat had found a food and water source, but he was worried that he'd been past our apartment the past few days, not seen the cat, and was worried due to the cold. He'd seen the outside "bed" my gf had fixed for the little fella but the bed was gone now, and he feared the worst.

Happily, my gf told him that Bobby was in process of being adopted and was in our apartment, warm and happy. The guy was delighted.

I am amazed still, how cats seem to find us. How do they know? We hadn't put out food or water prior to their clan of 4-5 arrival, only after we saw their hanging around our place. Of course, RJ would be out on the patio and small lawn a couple times a day but never let out unwatched -- he was declawed by his former owner before I found him, and he's old and slow and defenseless. He'd get mauled or run over in 30 minutes if unwatched. So he's only outdoors briefly each day, to grab some fresh air.

Do you think the strays smelled him and focused on our place as a result? Otherwise, how did they know that "cat people" were here?

I'm reminded of reading about hobos and how they made secret signs they'd leave for other hobos to find, beware of dog, harsh cops, and also "friendly handouts here" and wonder if feral and stray cats have their own secret codes? ha ha


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## Marcia (Dec 26, 2010)

Maybe GF can give Bobby extra cuddle time. I know that cats can switch loyality pretty easily. At the very least you can train him to stay at the foot off the bed. Eventually RJ will get used to seeing him near his favorite places.

I really do think that cats can sense cat people. At the shelter many of the cats are putty in my hands and the staff is amazed saying this cat was mean, or that cat was shy. I think they just know who understands them and who doesn't. It could have been seeing RJ did it. Cats are smart.

I'm so happy that the introductions have gone well. RJ must be an incredible cat to tolerate a new comer to his turf! Most are not as lucky as you are! Bobby will be a nice addition to the family. Do you have pics yet?

We don't get strays around my neighborhood, happily so I can't really address your original question. The one and only stray that chose me almost 20 years ago I sent off to another person, who ended up not being able to keep her and took her to animal control where she was euthanized. I was totally heartbroken that I had betrayed her. It really bothered me for years after that. God sent me a furry angel and I snubbed her.


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## Amcoffeegirl (Aug 7, 2013)

Maybe it is RJ that has sent for this little cat. To be "trained" by him on how to care for you upon his passing. Maybe RJ has chosen Bobby.


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## katdad (Jun 13, 2013)

And I'd like to present to you the first photo of Bobby, w. my girlfriend:



and here's our old timer RJ:


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## pkbshrew (Feb 13, 2013)

Gorgeous< gorgeous< gorgeous!


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## katdad (Jun 13, 2013)

Marcia said:


> At the very least you can train him to stay at the foot off the bed. Eventually RJ will get used to seeing him near his favorite places.


Any suggestions as to how to train the cat to stick to certain areas of the bed? If I push at him with my feet, he thinks it's playtime and out come the teeny needle claws! And I don't want to hit him in any way.

Ideas?


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## Jetlaya67 (Sep 26, 2012)

AWW, he is so sweet looking! RJ is a very handsome boy too. Bobby is a very lucky cat to have found you and your girlfriend.


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## katdad (Jun 13, 2013)

pkbshrew said:


> Gorgeous< gorgeous< gorgeous!


Yes, Bobby is totally smooth and sleek, his body and head are perfectly formed, his coat a fine soft grey. He's also got some rings (12) on his tail. Bobby is one of the most perfectly elegant little cats I've ever seen. Many cats are attractive -- RJ is a big hunk of lovin' fuzzy orange -- but for feline body perfection, Bobby is amazing. Not a mark or flaw on him anywhere, bright eyes, perfect teeth and feet and proportions.

When DaVinci said that "Cats are nature's masterpiece" he would be describing Bobby.


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## katdad (Jun 13, 2013)

Jetlaya67 said:


> AWW, he is so sweet looking! RJ is a very handsome boy too. Bobby is a very lucky cat to have found you and your girlfriend.


He picked us out, that's true.

Old RJ, at 19, is a bit shaggy and doesn't have the perfect coat he once did, but he just had a vet checkup and is sailing along is excellent health, a great buddy, gentle and affectionate, and naturally, as are ALL my cats, a rescue animal.


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## Marcia (Dec 26, 2010)

katdad said:


> Any suggestions as to how to train the cat to stick to certain areas of the bed? If I push at him with my feet, he thinks it's playtime and out come the teeny needle claws! And I don't want to hit him in any way.
> 
> Ideas?


Our Annie used to like to sleep at my head. I love my furbabies, but I don't like sharing my pillow. I used to pick her up and place her at my feet. If she moved I put my hand up as in a "talk to the hand" motion. Palm out and say "stay"

View attachment 42754


I did this quite a few times, over quite a few nights before she got the message. Depending on Bobby's age it may take some repetition but he'll get it. Bobby looks like my Lacey Mae! Needless to say they are both beautiful!


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## Mitts & Tess (Sep 4, 2004)

What a beautiful picture of your girl friend and your cats! How wonderful to see pictures with your "he picked us" story! Im gona look for that book!


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## howsefrau32 (Mar 6, 2013)

Yay!!! Everyone looks happy in the pictures, and I know you have made a bunch of cat people happy, knowing that Bobby has a loving forever home now. He IS very elegant looking, and RJ....I just want to hug him, he looks like a big, scruffy lion. 

I think the cats will be fine and they will work out the sleeping arrangement that works. My two boy cats sleep with my daughter at night, and the younger one likes to sleep right next to her, and the older one normally would sleep on the cat tree, and not even on the bed, but he now sleeps on the bed next to the other cat. I think maybe he was a little jealous, and wanted to make sure the other at wasn't getting all the attention, but they worked it out, and they are all good with each other now. Many times, we find them all snuggled up next to each other in the cat tree.


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