# Male vs Female Cats???



## jodie (Apr 2, 2009)

Hi there,
I recently lost my 10 month old, black male kitten, Tommy. He was hit by a car. My husband and I miss him a lot! I am totally devasted and I hope to avoid, as much as possible, losing another kitten this way. I plan to wait to get another kitten until we move to a safer neighborhood. I am just doing a little research.

So I was just wondering if you all have any advice for me:
Has anyone noticed if black cats seem to get hit by cars more because of their dark color?
Do you think male or female cats tend to stay closer to home? Of course they will explore more if they aren't fixed, but that won't be an issue, I had Tommy fixed as early as possible, and I will do the same with the next kitten.
Have you noticed if male or female cats are more friendly?
I've also noticed that black cats seem to have softer fur than some cats. I know food quality has a lot to do with it, but has anyone else noticed this?
And, in general, do you prefer male or female cats and why?
Thank you all for your feedback!
Hopefully our next cat will be as perfect as our TommyCat...and will live a much longer life.


----------



## RachandNito (Nov 21, 2008)

Has anyone noticed if black cats seem to get hit by cars more because of their dark color?
Do you think male or female cats tend to stay closer to home? 
-I find it's different with every cat, depending on how comfortable they are with the outdoors. Spay/Neuter helps a lot

Have you noticed if male or female cats are more friendly?
-In my experience, male. But there are many females cats that are just as nice.

I've also noticed that black cats seem to have softer fur than some cats. I know food quality has a lot to do with it, but has anyone else noticed this?
-I met a black cat once who had very straw-like fur, really textured and not that soft. In my opinion, it's the quality of food that makes for soft fur. Two weeks after I got my cat off the humane society low quality kibble and onto some good food, his fur was a LOT softer, it was quite noticeable. 

And, in general, do you prefer male or female cats and why?
-Male cats. My first cats were female. Playball ran away (unspayed), Misty was poisoned accidently, and Sandy wasn't nice at all, and also ran away :dis 

We've gotten boy cats since then, and we've had good luck so far (haven't lost a cat in 13 years now!). And so I lean towards males.


----------



## jodie (Apr 2, 2009)

Thanks RachandNito
I think I am leaning towards male cats too. Growing up, my family always had female cats, but we went through a few cats before this last one. I love her, but she is definitely independent- everything is on her terms, hehe.
Tommy was the first male cat I've had and the first cat I've had since being married. He was perfect for my husband and I. He knew to go to my husband to play and to come to me for lovin'. I think I want another male cat, but I was worried that him being male, or black, or friendly may be what got him killed. Tommy also had a few neighborhood cats that he hung out with a lot. One of them I know was an unaltered male, so maybe he was just following him. I thought he stayed pretty close to home, but I guess he was more adventurous than I thought. If I get another black or dark colored cat I will definitely try to keep him inside after dark as much as possible.


----------



## marie73 (Jul 12, 2006)

I have four girls and I think the sun rises and sets on them. :luv

Cleo has the softest, lushest fur. Her little legs, which I have to sneak to touch, are like velvet. And she has to sleep with her little paws touching my face or neck. 

Cali has started crawling under my shirt while I'm lying on my side watching t.v.

Cinderella will come under the blankets with me.

Charlee will try to walk on Cali when she's under my shirt so Cali leaves and she can have her spot. 

I'm not sure that *black *kitties are more likely to be hit by cars, but *outside* kitties are. Is there any way you could keep them inside? I realize that's not always an option.....

I'm very sorry about Tommy (love that name for a kitty). Do you have pictures of him you would like to share with us?


----------



## sheeba (Feb 26, 2009)

i think it depends on the cat itself. i prefer to have females. dont have to deal with the spraying. but i have had 3 male cats n i have loved them all. 1 ran away when one of my females gave birth, 1 ran away after we moved. ppl that moved him for me stressed him out too much so he took off, n the last was picked up by someone n given to the spca. 

all my female cats have been loving n sweet as can be. but like any female they have a temper. 

i found the one black female cat i had was evil but then again she was a street cat.


----------



## jodie (Apr 2, 2009)

I would consider keeping the next kitty inside. I know they are safer that way, but some cats just prefer to be outside. Tommy was a neighbor cat when I first met him. He started coming over when he was really little, too little to be outside. I was worried he was stray and started taking care of him and asking around. I got really attached. He showed up at a time in my life when I really needed him. I found out he did have a home, but a few months later his owner was packing up to move. I asked her if she was taking him with her, just to be sure he wasnt headed for the pound. His owner said she wasnt supposed to have a cat and needed to get rid of him. I was so happy to have him. To me, a house is not a home without a cat. So anyways, he was used to being outside a lot when I got him- he was about 6 months then. 
With my next cat, I hope to keep it inside as much as possible, but I really don't feel good about forcing it to stay inside. Hopefully it will be young enough that it will get used to being inside, and will learn to like it.
I would love to share some pictures. I tried to post some, but they are too big. I have to figure out how to make the pics smaller. I have a great one of him in a pile of fall leaves and in the snow.


----------



## sheeba (Feb 26, 2009)

if u get the cat from someone that has the keeps them inside the kitten will notn like the outdoor since never being out there. my new kitten i got freak if i take her outside she will also be an indoor cat. so when i take her outside its just on my shoulder or carrying her since i kind of need to take her outside to get to the vet.

n if u want to have a cat thats indoor/ outdoor but with safety u might want to see if u can get someone or u to build u a cat area thats totally infenced so that cat can be outdoor cant be hurt. im going to see about building one this year for my kitten n my older cat


----------



## marie73 (Jul 12, 2006)

It sounds like you and Tommy were very lucky to have found each other.


----------



## RachandNito (Nov 21, 2008)

You could always try leash-training the kitty! Or accompanying him on walks when he goes outside. That's what I do with Nito to make sure he stays safe.


----------



## hpi (Apr 2, 2009)

I'd rather have a female cat, I don't have to see no package dangling and don't have to accidentally touch it while petting it.

Male cats can be very aggressive but their usually friendlier then females, just like in real life


----------



## Bethany (Jul 19, 2006)

Anecdotally, I've heard male cats tend to be cuddlier. I've also heard that it's usually easier to introduce a new cat if your current cat is male, if that's a potential issue for you.

Many people believe that female cats tend to like men better and male cats tend to like women better. Frankly, I believe it, too. (We spent all those years thinking cats just preferred my father, even though Mom was the one who usually fed them... then my parents got a male cat and suddenly Dad was second-best and Mom was the favorite. And when my Dad helped me move... guess who my ladies wanted to cuddle with in the hotel room in the evening. Not me!)

That said, my female cats are plenty affectionate.  No, they don't want to constantly drape themselves over my shoulder the way my parents' (male) cat does with my mother... but I don't know that I really want them to!

Female cats are certainly less likely to spray or... er... hump.


----------



## Stansmom (Mar 30, 2009)

In my experience, male cats are more affectionate with people who aren't their owners. My girls have always been quick to cuddle with me, but it takes a while for them to warm up to my roommates/boyfriends/friends.

That said, I had one male cat (a Siamese) who used to bite my male houseguests. He was really tricksy about it too. He'd come up, climb on their laps, start purring, get the guys to start petting him, and then, BAM!, he'd bite them. I had to start locking him up whenever a male other than my dad walked in the door.


----------



## doodlebug (May 13, 2006)

I don't think there are any generalities that can be made about personalities being linked to sex. My experience is quite the opposite of what some of the others are saying. I've had a total of 5 cats over the years, 4 girls, 1 boy. 2 of the girls (Holly & Callie) are total snugglers, always wanting to be in my lap or held, snuggle up at night. The other 2 (Onyx & Maggie), while not lap cats, stay really close, lay right next to me on the couch, follow me from room to room and are snuggled up to me at night. 

Kobi is a lapcat, but rarely comes up on the bed at night. He also likes his own space, I can be downstairs, the girls will always be with me, but he's often upstairs taking a nap on the bed or in the carrier. If my parents are here, he throws me over in favor of my father. I have literally seen him walk into the living room, stop, look at each of us and choose my father. He's not nicer to visitors, because he's upstairs cowering. On the other hand, Holly loves everybody that comes in the house, greets them, engages them in play and will lay in their lap. 

So I think the upshot is that you should look for a cat that has the personality you want regardless of the sex.


----------



## gunterkat (Aug 19, 2006)

Both male and female cats can be very loyal companions, and they'll tend to stay close to home if neutered.
I have a female cat who I love with all my heart. She is my constant friend and companion. She calls my attention to possible dangers, and I look out for her, too. 
:heart :heart


----------



## nhekaz (Apr 4, 2009)

You guys were lucky to find eachother!


----------



## mstx (Mar 4, 2008)

I have had lots of males cats and now have 2 females. Here are the differences that I have noticed.

Males: usually "claim" a person- this person is thiers and they dont like to share
Like being held more 
are protective our thier human
Wander more

Females: have attitudes (I guese this goes with every species...lol)
Prefer being left alone unless they decide otherwise


----------



## jodie (Apr 2, 2009)

Tommy and I were definitely lucky to have found each other! 
Maybe cat personalities have more to do with how they got their start, or cat breeds, than sex. It just seems like most people prefer male or female cats and I was curious why. 
Also Tommy was perfect, so if there is any way I could get another cat like him, I will.


----------



## Jadedea Jade (Feb 3, 2009)

i prefer males. azores had a brother named balthasar whom passed away from fip. i loved that guy. loved him more than anything (except the hubbie of course). he cuddled all the time. he would even jump on my lap and curl up when i was on the toilet! my favorite thing to do with him is wrap him around my neck like a scarf and walk around. he was so silly that he would know when i was going to bed and follow me in and sleep next to me.

i was weary of getting a male cat because of, like a previous poster said, i might touch his bits, but it wasnt that bad. i think after he got neutered he didnt know it was there himself! i did pick him up differently and held him differently because of his bits but he was ok with it. 

im considering, even though i have two feuding female cats in the house now, to bring in a male kitten. im hoping he has alpha male traits and can put those two broads in their place lol, or at least stop the fighting lol.

but yeah, i definitely prefer male cats and i should of gotten one to begin with....oh well


----------

