# My mother died and I inherited her ill-tempered cat HELP!



## slider (Nov 12, 2007)

(I added this comment many months after the initial posting of this thread - you have to read the end of this story to believe it !!!)

My mom went into the hospital a month ago and died two weeks ago, leaving behind a ill-tempered and unpredictible cat that doesn't seem to like anyone. The cat is aptly named "Sassy". Mom was very attached to this cat and was worried what would become of her cat after her death. I promised mom I would take care of the cat. Mom knew her cat was not particularly nice and wrote me a note while she was on a ventilator "just ignore her- feed & water". My mother died shortly thereafter. I have returned to my hometown and am now living with my partner in my moms house with the cat. 

This cat has a history of bad behavior when mom was living. There are numerous stories of visitors getting a nasty deep bite despite my mom's warning not to pet the cat. Often she will lie still and appear quite pleasant. She will often let a stranger pet her for just a bit, but then suddenly and without warning whatsoever she slaps quite hard with claws fully out and bites very hard, then retreats, hisses and growls angrily. Obviously I never tried to pet the cat again after she did that a few times to me. 

When we moved into my mothers house about a month ago the cat hid from us completely. Whenever we got near her she would growl and slap violently at us (this was how the cat always reacted to strangers - it is not new behavior). Otherwise the cat behaves fine. She unfailingly uses the litter box and eats what we feed her. Gradually the cat has began to warm up just a bit. We have tried to be kind to her and most of the time I can hold a pan of food and let her eat from it. She usually purrs. Sometimes she rols around on the floor as if she wants to be petted. We found a back scratcher and we pet her with that. She seems to like it and never gets angry. But every now and then she hides and when I pass near her she growls and slaps at me. So I've moved her feeding place into the basement and made a nice cozy place for her to sleep in a nice dark corner under the bottom of the stairs. She seems to like it there. 

But this unpredictible behavior is really not a good thing. I would love the cat to be a part of our life and feel comfortable around us and enjoy being upstairs with us. But quite frankly I'm afraid of her and do not trust her. I don't feel I can give the cat away to anyone as I feel she is too dangerous. I cannot bring myself to put the cat down and really see no reason to do so at this time. But I am not planning on staying here any longer than it takes to get moms estate in order and sell the house. a year at the most, hopefully. And I wonder what will happen if I move and take the cat with me.

This is just a horrible situation. Could this cat have some sort of psychosis? I've only known one other cat in my lifetime that behaved so badly. Is there something I can do to make this cat more mellow? I don't want to declaw the cat and even if I did we would still have the problem of her biting so violently. A vet told me cats can be given prozak. Has anyone else tried anything like this? Or should I simply follow through with my mom's suggestion to leave the cat alone and just make sure she is fed and has water? 

HELP!!!!!


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## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

Wow, I don't know what to say. 
Obviously you want to honor your mother's wishes, but that cat! Wowsers!

You could take Sassy to the vet and see about prozac or some sort of drug to mellow her out...but you still gotta get it into her, every day. 
I don't know that I could keep such a disagreable animal. Because of health problems, I'd have to consider humane euthanasia due to her biting/clawing, OR, keep her entirely in one room with a run to an outside cat-cage and just treat her like a feral with very little contact.


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## melysion (Mar 12, 2007)

With all respect to Heidi, I have never understood the notion of putting a cat to sleep because it has behavioural problems. And I think it would be wholey unnecessary in this case.

In my humble opinion just give her the food and water as you Mum suggested and keep her nice and comfy in the basement as she likes it down there. Once you move I'm sure you can find somewhere else in your house that she can make herself comfy in.

I'm sorry for your loss. This cat must be putting extra pressure on you when you need it the least.


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## AddFran (Jul 10, 2004)

First, I am very sorry for the loss fo your mother. I agree with Melysion, this is the last thing you need to be faced with. However, it also seems from what you say that it was very important for your mother to know that her cat would be cared for and not desserted or put to sleep. 

Personally, I feel there is absolutely no reason to put the cat to sleep. I have lived with an anti-social biter for years. And, I've had her since she was a kitten. Whether it's mental, or just their personality, you'll never know. I think you should give her a space of her own where she can be left to do as she pleases and feed her like your mother asked. My cat Franny, wants nothing MORE than to just be left alone. She hisses at the wind and will bite if you pet her. Just as you describe, she will wander over from time to time, act like she wants to be pet but about 3 seconds later she'll turn around and smack you or bite your hand. But really, what's the big deal? She's not the cuddly cat I hoped she'd be, but it's no reason to do something drastic. 

Sometimes you have to remove your emotions from the situation. Adding to the fact that you just lost your mother and this was her cat, this makes it 10x harder...but at the end of the day, if you just leave Sassy alone and make sure she's fed, is it really so bad? I think putting her to sleep is an awful alternative and treating her as a feral is not a good way about it either. Putting an already scared indoor cat outside (even if it is in enclosure) would likely drive her very insane. My cat Franny got outside the door a few years ago while I was bringing in groceries. I didn't realize it and din't think for a second she'd be there, because she had no interest in going out...but then I heard this loud thumbing on the back door. Don't you know she was literally throwing herself into and smacking the door for me to come let her back inside. She hid under my bed for 3 days after that...

I am sorry that you are under so much stress and I'm sure just worrying about this is the last thing you need, but I guess what I'm saying is try not to worry too much, and just leave her be and feed her as your mother asked you too. Every so often, enjoy the two seconds she chooses to come out for a pet and just don't push the limits with her...

Good luck.


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## doodlebug (May 13, 2006)

I'm so sorry for the loss of your mom. I'm sure that you would love to establish a relationship with her kitty since it would be a little piece of your mom to hold on to.

How was she with your mother? If she was friendly then I think there's hope she may warm up to you after an adjustment period. I wouldn't try any major drugs at this point. Just make things comfortable, keep things quiet and don't stress her out. The fact that you expect to be there for a year is good...gives her a lot of adjustment time. I would keep her away from guests, just close her in a room or the basement. You can try some Feliway diffusers (synthetic cat phermones intended for calming). 

Also remember that she is feeling the loss of your mom as well. The only human in the world that she (possibly) liked and accepted has gone AWOL and she doesn't know why. That's also going to increase the crankiness.

It may take a couple months, but I think you can probably get to the point where there's a truce and maybe some mutual respect. Good luck....


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## Leazie (Apr 14, 2007)

I am so sorry about the loss of your Mom, and commend you on taking care of her cat. You are a special person.


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## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

Ouch. It seems clarification is in order because my post has been misunderstood.


Heidi n Q said:


> Because of health problems, I'd have to consider humane euthanasia...


Because *I* have health problems I would have to consider euthanasia or keeping that cat completely seperate from me. I am taking several immuo-suppressant drugs that also cause excessive bruising and bleeding and must be very diligent to avoid injury and infection from everyday living, let alone a cat bite/scatch which most agree can be of the nastiest variety of injury around. 

Because of my health problems, I could not care for a cat like this unless I kept it seperate like a feral...providing a safe room for it to live with an outdoor access to an attached and secure cat cage that the kitty could use if it chose to do so. Never did I intend to suggest to the Original Post-er that her cat be arbitrarily put outside or even put to sleep. In fact, my first suggestion was a visit to the vet for a medical solution to her behavior.


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## melysion (Mar 12, 2007)

Heidi n Q said:


> Ouch. It seems clarification is in order because my post has been misunderstood.


  Sorry Heidi. I hope i didnt come across as harsh. Thats never my intention.


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## Nini (May 6, 2007)

First, I am so very sorry for the loss of your mother... those are terrible hard times, and I admire how dedicated to this cat you are while being under such pressure. Your mother must be so relieved to know you are dealing so kindly with her beloved cat.

I second what's been said so far, that she will need time and patience, and may or may not warm up to you in the end. I have another question though, besides asking if she was friendlier to your mom: was she checked by the vet in the past few years? 

Just asking because my neighbors when I was a kid had a terribly aggressive cat. She would let them pet her a little, but would bite and claw anyone else dared touch her. After a few years of this - the cat was getting older too - their vet found out that the cat's back caused her a lot of pain, causing her to lash out at anyone touched the sore area.

Obviously even if your mother's cat did have some health problems causing her to feel pain when someone pets her, there must be more than that, since she lashes at you even when you just pass by... but it might be worth a shot to have her checked and make sure nothing piles up on her already antisocial behavior.

I would recommand trying the Feliway plugs too, see if that would mellow her down a little... and just tons of patience, of letting her come to you whenever she wants to (kudos for the idea of the back-scratcher too, very clever!!) and never forcing her to do anything that she does not feel safe doing. Maybe you could look up resources about dealing with feral cats, and apply some of those techniques with her?

Good luck... keep us posted!


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## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

No, you weren't harsh, it made me see that I wasn't very clear.

I will say, I do feel some animals with behavioral problems _do_ need to be euthanized. If the animal becomes a consistent danger to itself or others (animals or people), that warrants considering the option. Granted, I have never come across a cat where this needed to be considered, but I have heard of plenty of dogs and horses where this needed to be done, even after attempts at training to re-direct and eliminate the behavior. Luckily, cats are small and usually will keep to themselves and do not require such drastic measures.

My elderly neighbor in California had a similar temperament cat. 
Snookie would run up to you and if you bent to pet her, she would bite or claw your ankle. This behavior became even worse after she had a front leg amputated. Owen loved her, just the same. He never tried to pet her very often. ...and because of her behavior, I never tried, either! If I saw her coming towards me in the yard, I'd speak sharply to her to get her to stop some distance to me, then I would talk nicely to her, but I would not try to get close or let her get close to me.
That sort of arrangement worked for me and this cat.


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## slider (Nov 12, 2007)

Thanks everyone. The only comment I have is...what the heck is a feral? I guess I will google that. I just assume its some sort of wild animal type cat.

But I think most of you are right. And I think I figured something out about Sassy in the meantime. Seems like if I just treat her kindly and feed her she is warming up. I don't want to push it but she seems to be wanting more affection in just the past few days. Time I think is all that is needed. If she chooses to be a basement cat then so be it. She does go outside but I have a dickens of a time getting her back inside. I think mother had the same problem.

I honestly can't remember ever seeing my mother pet Sassy. but then Sassy always ran and hid when I came to visit. I am wondering if mom used the back scratcher on her as well. Mother was diabetic and had a very bad heart. She took coumadin which is a blood thinner. Whenever the cat nailed her she really bled a lot. It was actually a leg infection that put her in the hospital the last time and I wonder if it may have had anything to do with Sassy. 

But Sassy isn't really aggressive. She doesn't attack unless you try to pet her or put your hand near her accidentally when she is hiding. Seems like she only gets nasty when she is in a "new" hiding place and you find her. Odd, but the patterns are starting to be clearer. I just need to have patience and give her her space.

On a side note...she actually came out of the new "den" I made for her under the basement stairs and butted her head up against my leg affectionately. I just froze and held my breath and hoped she wouldn't do anything nasty. And she didn't.


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## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

It sounds like Sassy wants to be friendly. Baby steps, and maybe you both will get there. I don't think I've ever had a cat I couldn't pet. ...except for Snookie :wink: I had TNR'd (trap/neuter/release) a female feral and it took 14 months before she would let me TOUCH her, but by about 24 months or so, I was able to pick her up and place her on my lap.

Yes, feral refers to cats that have grown up without human contact, with minimal human contact or have been left to their own devices (abandoned or lost) and turn from domesticated to feral.


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## Avalonia (Oct 7, 2007)

I second the vet visit; Sassy may just be bad tempered but she may also be ill or have some kind of ongoing pain and medical condition. 

Aside from that, I agree to just let her be; feed her and let her come to you. You have a lot of patience and I think it is wonderful that you are respecting your mother's last wishes. The cat probably is missing your mother a lot and some cats are just more tempermental than others and have a much harder time adjusting to new people and situations. It already sounds like she's giving you good signs.

Again, kudos to you for what you are doing and I'm so sorry for the loss of your mother.


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## OctoberinMaine (Sep 12, 2006)

I'm just catching up with this thread on Thursday, but I wanted to add my condolence on the loss of your mother. Your heart is really in the right place with Sassy, and I really hope things continue to get better in baby steps. The fact that she rubbed herself on your leg is a good step! Who knows, maybe you'll continue to see little signs that she's warming up to you. 

I also find with my cat that she automatically bites if my hand crosses the front of her face in just a certain way. She's fine if I approach her cheeks from the side, but if it's directly in front she just automatically snaps and bites. I'm wondering if you'll figure out little ways that Sassy likes to be touched, or hates, but you'll at least learn more abut her and what she tolerates.


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## gunterkat (Aug 19, 2006)

I'm very sorry for your loss, Slider, and respect you for wanting to carry out your mother's wishes.

There is great advice in this thread, and I only have one tip to add regarding getting Sassy into a carrier so you can bring her to a vet: Get a mid-size carrier and put some food or treats in it, and when Sassy gets in it close the door. That seems like you're betraying the poor kitty, but in my opinion, it's kinder than forcing her into the carrier. 
The unfortunate part is that it might only work one time if she's a smart cat.


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## slider (Nov 12, 2007)

*Sassy is coming around!!!*

Wow! Its taken two and a half months of patience but Sassy is really starting to be a warm kitty. I would have never believed it to be possible. 

When we moved into my mothers house back in early October when my mother first went into the hospital, Sassy basically took off to the basement and hid there. After mother died in late October I created a whole new space for Sassy in the basement. I put her cat bed under the bottom of the basement steps and put boxes around it to make her feel enclosed and secure. She went right for it. Mother had food bowls at four different locations upstairs. I moved all her feeding bowls to one location near her new bed area. I moved all her scratching pads and her litter box nearby also. She has made that her home ever since. 

I began feeding her and doing everything near her new area. This seemed to make her a lot more secure. I began petting her with a back scratcher I found upstairs. I am wondering if this is how mother petted her as she really seemed to like it when I used it to pet her. I also used it to feed her treats. She began to purr and salivate whenever I brought it near her. 

About three weeks ago, to my surprise, when I would make a trip to the bathroom or kitchen in the middle of the night I began seeing her upstairs. But as soon as she was spotted, zip, off she went back to the basement.

Also about three weeks I began to pet her with a gloved hand while scratching her with the back scratcher. In the past week I would also pet her a few times bare handed as I fed her canned food on a plate. Never too much though - just a couple of gentle pets and then a slow retreat. Occasionally she would take a slap at me but it became much more of a gentle pat, often without claws. When I learned not to withdraw my hand (gloved) the biting gradually disappearred. She has not made any attempts to bite me now in over two weeks.

Today I decided to put on my leather motorcycle jacket and gloves and see if I could pick her up and bring her upstairs. She put up a bit of a fuss, made a crying type meow, but did not bite or growl at all. I brought her upstairs to the den and sat down in a chair with her in my lap. After about 30 seconds the crying meows turned into a purr. Within a minute she had completely mellowed out, and continued to allow me to pet her with my gloved hand for several minutes. I put her on the sofa and went back to the basement to get the back scratcher and some treats. When I returned I picked her up and moved her to the front living room where she used to like to look out the front window. I put her down on the floor and stayed with her a while, petting her and feeding her treats. After a bit of uneasiness she relaxed, stretched out under the coffee table and rolled around as if she wanted to be petted some more. As I am typing this she is still laying under the coffee table purring and watching me. 

I don't know what caused Sassy to be so nasty all these years. But patience, protecting myself with gloves so I did not have to retreat after she swatted at me seems to have gained her respect and trust. I really hope my mother, wherever she is, knows that Sassy is doing just fine.

Thanks to everyone for your encouragement and support. It really helped.


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## Leazie (Apr 14, 2007)

Slider, I want to commend you for being so patient and loving with Sassy. You are truly a wonderful person. How wonderful that you have brought such joy to and understand to her life.


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## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

Such fabulous news! It seems she has just been waiting for a chance to be a loveable kitty... I'm certain your mother would be pleased. I know I would certainly be pleased to know my pets were cared for so well after I had passed away.


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## melysion (Mar 12, 2007)

thats lovely news


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## marie73 (Jul 12, 2006)

That brought happy tears to my eyes.


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## doodlebug (May 13, 2006)

Awww....that's great! I'm really happy to hear that she's mellowed, bet she's a really snuggle bug in a few more months. Thanks for coming back and giving us an update.


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## nanook (Jun 12, 2005)

What wonderful news!


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## BoscosMum (Apr 29, 2004)

I am sorry about your Mom.

Great news with Sassy! 

Have you tried any dangle wand type toys to play with her.
I bet she would enjoy that. 
I like how you are rewarding her with treats. Great job!


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## hypertweeky (Nov 25, 2007)

*Re: Sassy is coming around!!!*

I am so happy for you! Good JOB!!!


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## Nini (May 6, 2007)

Wow, wonderful news! This kitty is very lucky to have someone so patient and loving to take care of her...


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## moarias1984 (Oct 20, 2006)

Wow!! This is such good news! You're such a patient person and that's what kitty needed. Good for you!


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## slider (Nov 12, 2007)

*Sassy Update*

Well, she is doing better all the time though I did get a bite today for reasons I am starting to understand a bit. I am convinced the boys in the house where she came here from abused her - probably slapped her around with their hands. I reached across in front of her today after she had behaved particularly affectionate. I guess it surprised her, she nipped me quickly and bolted though no scratch or hiss. Then she stopped and looked back at me as if to say, oops. I just have to be careful with her. She has started coming back upstairs a lot more and is slowly integrating into our lives. I have began feeding her canned food upstairs but have left the dry food and water in dispensers in the vicinity of her "private" area in the basement. Soon I am going to bring her bed back upstairs and see if she deals with that ok. I am hoping by the time we move out of this house next summer that she will be secure enough not to be too upset by it. 

I have tried the dangling toy deal with her. She isnt too amused by it. Sometimes she will play with string. But she is always vocal whenever I come near her - meows and wants me to come pay attention to her. Not the growl, hiss, run, and hide routine of a few months ago.


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## gunterkat (Aug 19, 2006)

That is Great News! I think most cats know the difference between their instant reaction behaviors and their considered actions.

A few learn complete control of their instincts with time.


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## Mom of 4 (Jul 29, 2006)

Will you think that I am strange if I think that your taking in your Mom's cat is helping both of you adjust to her loss? You both loved your Mom and miss her, so it is wonderful that you be around someone else who loved her.


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## Kittys Mom (May 7, 2004)

*Re: Sassy Update*



slider said:


> I have tried the dangling toy deal with her. She isnt too amused by it. Sometimes she will play with string.


It may be time to get her a Da Bird...the ULTIMATE cat toy. I've never met a cat who didn't at least find it a bit interesting. My 4 LOVE it.


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## Auntie Crazy (Dec 10, 2006)

Wow, this is the saddest, sweetest thread. You are a wonderful person doing a wonderful thing. I'm so sorry you lost your mom; so happy you and Sassy have each other.

God bless you both!

A.C.

(P.S. Instead of moving her bed entirely, could you buy her/make her another one? That way, she knows she's welcome upstairs and can sleep there if she wants to, while still having the security of her bed downstairs.)


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## Mitts & Tess (Sep 4, 2004)

I think Auntie Crazys idea of two beds is a good one. Cats need a place to feel safe. So the one downstair will do. Plus the one upstairs will show here she can live up there when she is ready to. Put the one upstairs that has her scent on it. Kudos to you for your efforts with her.

My friends had a semi feral cat that acted the same way as Sassy. He never totally changed but picked out them to feel safe with. Im sure your mom is smiling from heaven knowing the efforts youre making for her last withes. Keep us updated.

Maybe by the time you move she will have adjusted to you as her person! Did you ever take her to the vet?


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## slider (Nov 12, 2007)

I'm ahead of you all. I ran across a second wicker cat bed we had since I was a kid. So I brought it upstairs and put it in a nice spot in our family room. It wasn't there ten minutes until Sassy was in it. 

At this point she is spending about as much time upstairs as downstairs. When I moved in I brought the couch from my apartment and put it in the living room. It sits where mom used to have a small table that Sassy would jump up on to look out the big picture window. Now she has this really comfy couch instead. She spends most of the time there now.

She roams freely upstairs now and has become quite vocal. When she comes into the room where we are she meows at us until we pay attention to her. I still use the back scratcher or a ruler to pet her sometimes but just as often I use the bare hand now. I haven't been bitten or scratched since the last time I reported it over two weeks ago. She really is making progress fast. Sometimes she lays down on my feet which makes me just a bit nervous as she likes to kneed my feet and her claws are quite sharp. But so far she has not hurt me and I am starting to relax a bit more. I would never have thought this was possible two months ago. If mom could see this she would be amazed and certainly pleased.

By the way...what is DA BIRD (cat toy)?


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## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

slider said:


> If mom could see this she would be amazed and certainly pleased.


I, for one, am convinced that she does know. :wink: 

Da'bird is a cat toy that you can use to help exercise your kitty. I don't have one, but if I am recalling correctly, it is a plastic wand, with a short length of string or plastic line (about 3-4 feet?) and has feathers on the end that twirl when swung through the air. Kittys can reach great heights trying to jump and capture 'da bird' that is flying in their living room!

Our cats really like the little laser toys that project a small red dot. We run it smoothly along the floor, walls and doors to get them running and jumping. The only problem with this toy (and probably da bird, too) is they will play with these until they are exhausted, so you need to watch them and stop before they get worn out and are panting.


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## Kittys Mom (May 7, 2004)

Da Bird looks a lot like a regular feather wand cat toy. The main difference is two-fold. The end of the string that connects to the feather attachment has a swivel hook thingy. The feathers are special in the aerodynamics of their shape. The result, when you move Da Bird back and forth, the feathers spin and make a fluttering noise that makes most cats play like kittens.

http://www.go-cat.com/


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## Silver deer (Dec 31, 2007)

marie73 said:


> That brought happy tears to my eyes.


Me too! What a wonderful thread. I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. I'm so impressed with how patient and understanding you've been with Sassy.


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## doodlebug (May 13, 2006)

slider said:


> Sometimes she lays down on my feet which makes me just a bit nervous as she likes to kneed my feet and her claws are quite sharp.


I know you don't want to ruin the trust she's gained so far and don't know if it would even be possible at this point to do it, but at some point you need to think about clipping her nails (or having a groomer or vet do it). A claw can curl over and grow into the pads on her feet...quite painful and potential risk of infection. 

Glad to hear it's going so well!


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## slider (Nov 12, 2007)

*Sassy's Claws*

Thanks Doodlebug. Mother has a clipping tool here but I dont think we want to risk trying to use it just yet. She has only a little trouble getting snagged up on cloth things when she "kneeds" them with her front paws so I think she is not yet to that point. She also has scratching pads all over the basement and she seems to use them regularly so I think that helps with the manicure upkeep. But I do think a visit to the vet may be in order by springtime when she is due for her annual shots. She appears to be in very good health and has turned into a real happy cat.


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## slider (Nov 12, 2007)

*Sassy's new name*

The once fiery scratching biting hissing Sassy is now a mellow purring, pet me, meow-er. We can pick her up, carry her around, pet her whatever and no biting or scratching. She lives upstairs totally and seems quite content most of the time, except when she walks into the room and we do not notice - she quickly alerts us to her presence and meows until she gets our attention. A lot of times she just wants us to talk to her. I get it now - my mother was a jabber box and lived alone with Sassy. She probably talked to Sassy constantly. 

My partner calls Sassy "football" because at first he wanted to punt her because she was so mean to us. But now whenever he comes home from work he immediately goes looking for her and usually plays with her or pets her. And when he is watching tv he wants her to be on the couch with him. I'm getting jealous.

Cats are apparently no different than most people. Unless there is some hidden physical or mental disease, if you consistently show them love without passing judgement on them they will come around. The only difference is that it may take less time with a cat. :lol:


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## doodlebug (May 13, 2006)

Awww.....it's great that you've won her over. I bet you guys feel great about it! How does she do when other people come in the house?


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## slider (Nov 12, 2007)

*Sassy*

We don't have a lot of other people in the house. But so far, when they are here, she just hangs out. She is definitely more brave when its just us in the house. But she doesn't freak out and run to hide like she used to when I was the stranger.

Another thing I have noticed is that she doesn't go completely nutzo when she is sitting by the window and sees another cat outside. She growls at them, but I used to think she was going to break out the glass to get out to them. I think we have had a calming effect on her overall.


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## slider (Nov 12, 2007)

*Six Month Update*

Sassy is a completely different cat nowdays. She follows me around like a puppy and hasn't bitten or scratched or hissed in months. She loves to play and constantly seeks my attention. I would have never believed this would happen. 

So just a note of encouragement to all you struggling with cat behavior problems I will simply offer the following advice:

Kindness - patience - but above all CONSISTENCY. 

Though you may often be tempted to physically smack or strike your cat when it bites or scratches you DON"T EVER DO IT - they will only respond negatively. Simply protect yourself with gloves or clothing when you approach your pet and prove to it that you will never hurt it. IT WORKS!


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## OctoberinMaine (Sep 12, 2006)

That's such a great update! You've done a really remarkable job with Sassy.


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## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

What a wonderful transformation with your Mother's kitty! I'm so happy she is turning into a fabulous kitty for you guys.
h


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## Mitts & Tess (Sep 4, 2004)

That is such great encouragement and information for struggling cat owners who will be reading this. So glad you posted it. You are so kind for the patience and love youve shown your mom cat. Im sure your mom is smiling from heaven at how hard youve worked at this and her beloved kitty is well cared for and safe


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## nanook (Jun 12, 2005)

> Kindness - patience - but above all CONSISTENCY.
> 
> Though you may often be tempted to physically smack or strike your cat when it bites or scratches you DON"T EVER DO IT - they will only respond negatively. Simply protect yourself with gloves or clothing when you approach your pet and prove to it that you will never hurt it. IT WORKS!


This should be in bold letters in a sticky at the top of every page!!  
I am SO thrilled to hear how well Sassy is doing. It literally got me all teary eyed! She's a very lucky kitty that you took the time to work with her and I'm sure it was worth every second for you too. What a wonderful way to honor your Mother and bring more love into your life. I'm sure she knows.
Thank you so much for posting this and letting us know.


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## slider (Nov 12, 2007)

*The Latest Chapter in the Story of Sassy*

Well, having consistency and patience is a lesson I will never forget. Sassy never ceases to amaze me with the incredible transformation from the evil cat from **** to the elegant miss manners she is today. 

My partner has begged for us to get a puppy for three years. Ive always had a good reason not to get one. Still living in the house I also inherited from my mother, along with Sassy, the longest term resident of the house now, I did not want to complicate the situation and undo the progress we have made together. But it now appears we will still be here for a while and I saw no reason not to get a puppy other than the possibility that Sassy would regress. So I gave in and we started the hunt for a puppy a few weeks ago.

After considering many breeds we settled on Pembroke Welsh Corgis. My partner has experience with this breed and I have always liked the looks of the dog. Months of research seemed to indicate these dogs are extremely intelligent and good with other pets. So we looked around for a breeder in our area. This past week we located a breeder about two hours away. We gave her a call. She had two puppies left from a litter of six. So off we went to Somerset Pennsylvania.

When we arrived it was clear there were a lot of dogs in this household. Two terriers were running free in the house while a very large crate in the kitchen area housed a Schnauzer and another smaller "mop" dog. The breeder opened the crate and suddenly there were four dogs running around with us as we stepped out the back door. Out back were three kennels, two containing five adult Corgis and one containing the two puppies. As soon as the puppies' cage door was opened out they came and it was clear these puppies were used to being around a lot of other dogs as they romped joyously with the dogs that had accompanied us from inside the house. I watched carefully to see which of the puppies would be the first to respond to either my partner or I. One puppy was considerably smaller than the other even though they were brothers from the same litter. The smaller one seemed more mellow and calm while the larger one was more outgoing and boistrous. I wasn't sure which one I liked best. But clearly they were too busy playing with each other and the other dogs to notice me or my partner.

And then it struck me...how on earth could I possibly take a puppy out of this environment to go live with sassy and have no other dogs around? The though had never occurred to me to get two dogs. I thought to myself, I cant do that. Then I thought again...why not???? To my partners utter shock I turned and asked the breeder - "would you be able to cut us a break if we took both puppies?" I could see the relief in her face as she said "I was just about to offer..." SOLD-Two incredibly cute Corgis to the soft-hearted man.

On the way home it was clear I had made the right choice. The puppies were incredibly well behaved on the ride home...not a whimper. We stopped at a lakeside park on the way home for a pee and potty break. As we got closer to home I began to think "how is Sassy going to deal with not one, but TWO puppies?" I figured I'd just use the same strategy I used nearly a year ago - I'd let Sassy call the shots and I'd just do my best to make sure she didnt feel like we were going to neglect her or in any way give her less attention than she has become accustomed to having.

The first day I did my best to keep Sassy from seeing the puppies. But later in the afternoon I was caught by surprised when she appearred out of nowhere. I walked into the room where I had the puppies sleeping in a homemade crate made from commercial bread racks like the ones used for vendors to transport bread in and out of grocery stores. And there, to my utter amazement, sat Sassy, about ten feet away from the crate. Just calmly observing. She didn't appear to be anything more than mildly curious. I was expecting something much more dramatic....like when animals appear outside the double glass doors in our den....she usually growls and hisses, slaps at the glass as if she is about to break through at any second and chase away the unwelcome visitor. But not this time.

By day two Sassy was coming closer. At one point she came into the room while the puppies were out playing...and suddenly there they were, face to face. Sassy gave a warning hiss and slap at the floor and that was it. She didnt puff up or run away. She just let the puppies know that she was in charge.

By day three Sassy was just going about her business as usual, always keeping an eye on the puppies but not really appearring threatened in the slightest. At one point I was feeding Sassy treats with one hand and the puppies treats with the other. I was holding my breath waiting for the other shoe to drop...but everyone was happy. Sassy was purring away. Later that day I had the door to the deck open and the puppies were playing in the den. Sassy was sitting about three feet away from the door when suddenly the puppies in their joyous romp darted out the door, one after the other. And then, almost as if it was some reflex, Sassy too went flying out the door after them...to my utter amazement, not to attack - it was clear she wanted to play too. WHOA! Is my mothers spirit somehow manifest in this cat now? I wonder. Animals never cease to amaze me - and it just proves that when you show a living creature love, consistently, things you think are impossible can happen.

So it appears that Sassy does not question that she is still Queen of the House. And now she has two very cute little buddies to entertain her. Who would have thought????


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## ~Siameseifuplz~ (May 6, 2007)

I'm so glad Sassy is better, she must be much happier and glad to be a loved family member. And now she has friends to share her joy with, I'm glad you stuck through it all. you have done a great job, she integrated with the two dogs incredibly well!

Do be careful though, getting two puppies is never a good idea, I doubt the breeder's responsibility if she gave you two but I don't know anymore about her (showing, health screening, temperament tests she does etc.) so perhaps I'm wrong. Make sure they have separate time (a few hours) each day completely away from each other and alone time with you and your partner. They should be trained apart until they completely understand their commands and then you can work with them together. It's also recommended that they be apart when home alone until at least 6-8 months of age and be sure they have their own crates. Some pups raised together do fine, some end up becoming aggressive towards each other (that happens a lot at the dog rescue I volunteer with) and some end up too close, to the point where you are not important to them, they have each other. Some even end up with severe Separation Anxiety when separated from each other. I don't mean to upset you, it's just important that you take measures to prevent those things from happening, I know people who have had things from all three sections, I know two Chihuahuas who were fine, two Cavaliers who attacked each other daily and many dogs who have trouble bonding with owners or being apart from each other (that seems to be most common). So do take precautions. 
Dogs are very important to me and I spend much of my time learning about them so I felt I need to step in and give some info. Please do not take it the wrong way.


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## marie73 (Jul 12, 2006)

Another wonderful chapter in this story! Thank you so much for sharing it with us and keeping us updated  

Pictures would be a bonus. (hint, hint)


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## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

Sassy IS amazing! I think her story is wonderful. You've changed her life in so many ways, and it seems she is enjoying the puppies, too.
Wonderful. Absolutely wonderful!


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## canismajor (Mar 9, 2008)

This is a really cool story. I really admire your patience and understanding with Sassy! So glad it was a happy ending.


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## nanook (Jun 12, 2005)

OMG! Your post actually got me all teary! What a wonderful outcome!! What an incredibly lucky cat Sassy is to have you. And now she has two buddies too. Just awesome!!
Can't wait for pictures!


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## Jonathan415 (Jul 18, 2008)

It sure was fun reading about the cat from ****. At first, I thought, wholly smokes, you are really in for it with psycho cat. But I'm glad it worked out better than anyone can expected based on the history. I'm really surprised by the outcome. This would be an inspiration to anyone who ever has to deal with an overly aggressive cat, and feel like there is no end in sight. You've just shown that anything is possible.

Come to think of it, If I were left in a situation with a difficult cat, I truely wouldn't know how to handle the cat, except to stay away, and lock her up in the bathroom until she learns to behave. 8O


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## OctoberinMaine (Sep 12, 2006)

That's absolutely great, Slider. Your house must be really entertaining with all three of them! Thanks a lot for the update.


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## LilRed (Jul 16, 2008)

This is such a great story and gives hope to those that are dealing with bad behaving kitties!! Thanks for sharing this story. My sympathies to you on the loss of your mother. I am sure she is so proud of you & Sassy!

Oh, and by the way, we too went to get a new puppy and as we watched them play, decided why not get two! It is one of the best decisions we ever made. It went so well, when we decided to get another cat, we got two siblings! No regrets there either!


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## OctoberinMaine (Sep 12, 2006)

I'm interested in Siamese's comments above about having 2 puppies. The thing I don't understand is -- everyone seems to agree, almost to the point of being fanatic about it, that it's always best to have at least 2 cats so they can keep each other company. Dogs, on the other hand, are most often in homes as the only dog. But dogs are the pack animals, and cats aren't! How did we arrive at the point where it's considered practically inhumane to have one cat, but dangerous and ill-advised to have 2 dogs?


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## Silver deer (Dec 31, 2007)

October said:


> How did we arrive at the point where it's considered practically inhumane to have one cat, but dangerous and ill-advised to have 2 dogs?


I'm not sure! Most of my friends have always had two dogs, and haven't had any problems.


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## melysion (Mar 12, 2007)

At one point we had three dogs in the family home. All lived very happily together. Only one remains, sadly, (the other two died) but I see no reason whatsoever in not having more than one dog.

Heres the proof










And Toby seems more than happy being an only cat. Do people seriously think its 'almost unhumane' only to have one??

Oh - and just to get back on topic - we want pics of the lovely lady, Slider . It does my heart good reading about Sassys story :heart


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## ~Siameseifuplz~ (May 6, 2007)

I did not mean that having two dogs was wrong, having too puppies of similar age is, who grow together. For example, getting a puppy and waiting six months or more and getting another is fine, adopting two adults or buying an adult when you already have one is fine, or adopting an adult and buying/adopting a puppy at the same time is fine but raising two puppies of similar age together is not for the reasons I listed. Having multiple dogs is fine or even very good depending on the dog.

Cats are different (it's good to get two kittens) because usually people looking for cats don't want one who will stick to you like glue as many dogs do. People are not saddened when they have a cat who would rather spend time with the other cat than with the owner, with dogs it is saddening. Plus with dogs there is the whole training aspect, most people want to train their dogs somewhat formally (train them to know the basic commands for safety and sanity) and with two pups, who both need a TON of training it can be difficult in the first place. It is pretty near impossible to actually train two dogs together (like side by side at the same time) so you want to separate for training, but when their attachment is thrown in their (because they were raised together and have never been apart) separating for training can make the dogs dislike training, be unable to focus, show signs of anxiety or even howl/bark/scratch at door because they want to be with the other dog so much.

So yeah, multiple dogs is great, raising pups together, not so much.


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## camel24j (Jan 12, 2007)

with dogs i have the opiste problem i have 4 but my 2 girls are 12 1/2 yrs and one will be 9yrs next month they have sepration problem. they love to cuddle but on the other hand they will fight every few month about who knows what. i got them both as puppys. so even getting them a few yrs apart can end up with the same problems.

but i will say i like have more than one cat i think it is way better.



back on topic how are things going with the new puppys and the kitty?


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