# Cats and Babies



## cooncatbob (May 27, 2011)

I've seen a recent topic where due to a pregnancy kitty must go and another where kitty hissed at a toddler and was getting the boot.
What are these people thinking? Kitty's going to steal baby's breath or stalk the rug rat and savage it?
I grew up in a menagerie in the late 50s and 60s, we always had a dog lots of cats and chickens and rabbits.
When our cats had kittens my older sister would make sure on pain of terrible punishment that my brother and I didn't bother them.
The cat never hissed at me because I was taught respect for kitty, but if it did I would probably be swatted and told to leave kitty alone.
Getting kicked out of the family can be a death sentence for an adult cat, shelters and rescues are over flowing.
In my opinion this is a violation of the blinding moral contract we make with an animal when we make it our pet.
The fault of supposed bad behavior by a pet is more then likely to lie with the pet owner and their failure to understand their pet.
Small children should never be left alone with any pet, they should also be taught respect for the pet and how to touch it.
I've seen a wonderful video on you tube of a toddler playing with a very large Maine **** Cat with a fishing pole toy and they're having a great time, but they're under supervision.
If that child hit the cat with the pole the cat would have every right to be upset, but in some house holds the cat would be blamed and gotten rid of.


----------



## BotanyBlack (Apr 6, 2011)

when I was pregnant with my first child I had 3 cats. Everyone and I mean everyone constantly told me to get rid of the cats. Yes i even got the "they will smother" the baby story. So I set up the baby stuff in the room for the child and let the cats climb on, in and around the stuff, after a day they lost interest. I never caught one in the crib. Yeah when the child finally got mobile they would hiss at her and move when she tried to grab them, until she learned they were not plushies.. well my daughter is 12 and I still have those same 3 cats. 

I did compromise though and hand the litter scoop to my OH though 

I agree that cats are blamed for people not teaching their kids to treat them right also.


----------



## cooncatbob (May 27, 2011)

That's a good idea to let the cat's explore the baby room before baby arrives.
Cats are naturally nosy creatures.
I imagine most cats would view an unleashed toddler as something to avoid.


----------



## Lenkolas (Jan 18, 2011)

One of my cats scratched my 5 year old nephew when they were visiting. He was warned not to play rough. The scratch was not serious tho, but I bet it hurt.
I said "I told you". 
His mom said "we told you", while washing his hand and disinfecting the scratch.

My nephew learned his lesson. 

It has to do with how you respect your pets and warn visitors that pets are part of the family here. Once one of my sister's friends came home and at one point he made a movement as if he would kick my cat Gatito. My boyfriend told him "if you kick him, I'll kick you back". That caused a huge problem because in this guy's opinion that was rude and disrespectful considering it was "just the cat". But if people refuse to understand our cats are family members and not "just the cats", then probably they shouldn't be our friends.


----------



## cooncatbob (May 27, 2011)

Sounds like your boy friend is a keeper, I would have forcibly removed the person from my home for threatening to kick my cat.

I think a lot of problems people have with their pets are caused because the person didn't do their home work first. 
They just see a cute little kitten without thinking about type of cat it's going to be when it's an adult.
They don't considered they have a moral obligation to care for that pet it's entire life.
I read story on another forum where the people never let the cat inside for 3 years, they just fed it and when they moved they left it behind.
That's just like the people who get a puppy and when it grows up the chain it in the yard and get mad when it barks.


----------



## Sinatra-Butters (Aug 9, 2010)

When we got Nutmeg at the Humane Society her intake form said her last family gave her up because she "tried to smother their baby".


----------



## MowMow (Nov 6, 2010)

Sinatra-Butters said:


> When we got Nutmeg at the Humane Society her intake form said her last family gave her up because she "tried to smother their baby".


LMAO. I am imagining Nutmeg "Man, this thing won't shut up but don't worry. I'll just muffle the noise a bit!"


----------



## Sinatra-Butters (Aug 9, 2010)

She does attack our cell phones when they ring because she hates the noise....


----------



## Janeway (Jul 9, 2011)

That reminds me how dad and l got cutie. (dad named her that) When dad was working and a woman gave this gray cat (she was a year old when we got her also she was fixed and declawed) to dad becaues it tryed to do the very same thing to her daughar's baby. I agree cats/kittens need to be trained how to deal with/when a new baby is in the house.


----------



## applesparks (May 5, 2010)

Some people truly love animals, some people just get pets because they're cute or because they see other people do it. It makes me very sad when people get rid of "beloved" pets because of babies/kids or because they're moving. Did they even try at all to make the situation work and keep their pet?? It really frustrates me because a lot of people plan that they'll have children in two, three, four years, yet it doesn't occur to them that if they don't want a cat around a future baby, they shouldn't get a cat now.


----------



## praline (Jun 3, 2011)

I am a huge advocate of "If your planning on having a baby in the next 10 years, don't get a pet."

Its not fair to the animal nor the baby. 

I have been there, done that and its extremely hard. 
I had 2 dogs and a cat when Savannah was born and let me tell you, after breastfeeding every 2 hours around the clock with a screaming baby, healing myself.. I did not have the energy to properly care for my 4 legged kids. There was just NOTHING left in me to give. The pets were stressed, I was stressed and the household was stressed. Not good for anyone.

Luckily we made it through those newborn days but rolled right into crawling and putting everything in their mouth. If I was a slower moving mom, Savannah would be able to describe the exact taste of cat poop... more then once :? She loved the litter box :? Dog food:? and more then once I was grabbing a dog bone out of her mouth. 
She would pull on fur to stand up, she would teeth on them. My poor China got it in the ear once and it bled =( 

After that is the pre toddler phase of 18 months of devil in them. :?
They torture the poor pets with love and attention. They chase after them screaming and laughing. These little beast always have something tasty in their hands to tempt even the best mannered pet.

My poor 4 legged babies went through A LOT with babies. I will always be forever grateful to their mild mannered temperament. I will also feel bad for what they had to endure in the house.

IF a family wants to re-home a pet due to a baby coming, more power to them. If they do it responsibly and find a good caring, loving home for the pet. Dumping them at a shelter is not the answer =/

Also understand that during this stress both dogs and cats have been known to attack the baby. Its not the pets' fault so much as they just lose it. There are tons and tons of cases of dogs and cats attacking babies and toddlers. My 14 year old sports a permanent scar on his cheek from when he was 2 years old. My mother in law had a little mutt dog and when he went to pet the dog, it freaked out and bit him in the cheek. Two year olds can't comprehend dog manners. Usually at age 3 they begin to get the picture. 

It takes an EXTREMELY special pet to accept and love the attentions of a baby/toddler. Human kids come before pet kids. The contract you make with your pet is wonderful but not near as important as the contract you make with your human child. 

But RE-HOME responsibly and give the pet a chance before getting rid of them. They might surprise you:wink


----------



## praline (Jun 3, 2011)

I should add that babies and toddlers stress out the most mild manner folks after a few weeks ... and they are human. Throw that kind of stress on a pet who has no choice but to take it, it doesn't seem all that fair to them.

Heck I don't like being around babies and toddlers I can't imagine how a pet feels!

My favorite Parent quote
"Teaching Toddlers manners is like nailing jello to a tree"


----------



## dweamgoil (Feb 3, 2010)

I do agree with Praline's point of view and commend you for managing your pets and a small child. It must have been VERY challenging...kudos to you!

I also agree with most posters' comments regarding communicating the rules to guests as far as the pets are concerned. For me, my ex and I had attempted for him to have his visitations with our young daughter at my house before the settlement of our divorce, but his ideas as far as the pets, was conflicting with my house rules so I quickly scrapped him coming over. 

For example, when the cats were in 'crazy mode' I would tell him to close the door to my daughter's room if the two of them were playing on the floor. Of course, he never did, and the cats would race in there and run over anyone in the way, and one time a hand was scratched...nothing serious, but he would get all bent out of shape and start yelling at me for not keeping the cats confined. To me, it was like how dare he? He is ONLY a guest in MY home. Long story short, he is no longer welcome in my home. He tried for a while to call me the 'crazy cat lady' in order to try to manipulate me into correcting the situation and cave to his whims...I don't think so!

My 7 year old has been taught how to interact with the cats and they never run, scratch, or bite her. They respect her because she respects them. She knows they are pets and have preferences and wills of their own, not toys she can manipulate and command at will. However, with a much smaller child this would be a much greater challenge....I can only imagine. This is also why I waited this long to adopt the cats and when I did, I started out with an adult cat instead of a kitten since I felt my daughter, at that time, was too young to deal with a small kitten.


----------



## Dave_ph (Jul 7, 2009)

Sinatra-Butters said:


> When we got Nutmeg at the Humane Society her intake form said her last family gave her up because she "tried to smother their baby".


Normally I'd consider that absurd but having seen Nutmeg's 'Dramatic Kitty' photo...


----------



## MowMow (Nov 6, 2010)

Dave_ph said:


> Normally I'd consider that absurd but having seen Nutmeg's 'Dramatic Kitty' photo...


That would explain her expression. Maybe she was having a flashback of the screaming beast in the crib.


----------



## kittywitty (Jun 19, 2010)

Well, when I picked up my Little Pumpkin from a pregnant lady with a two year old I even asked her would she want the cat back after the baby is born. She said no, "I just want the cat to go to a good home" and even gave me her food bowls and carrier. I also offered money since the cat was spayed and she refused. I asked her if she had any other people interested in the cat and she said yes, but "You were the best one". She didn't interview me like a cat rescue group would but I did send her my other cat's myspace profile where she could see all the toys and tree house I gave my cats. What concerned me was how she didn't even say goodbye to the cat. Just put her in the carrier and that was it. It's no wonder why it took so long for Little Pumpkin to trust people. She was hissing at my boyfriend and me for a while and then she would hiss at Oreo. Things are much calmer now though. Well, I am lucky the pregnant lady picked me because I love my Little Pumpkin.


----------



## RachelMC (Jun 30, 2011)

cooncatbob said:


> Sounds like your boy friend is a keeper, I would have forcibly removed the person from my home for threatening to kick my cat.
> 
> I think a lot of problems people have with their pets are caused because the person didn't do their home work first.
> They just see a cute little kitten without thinking about type of cat it's going to be when it's an adult.
> ...



That's HORRIBLE! I couldn't imagine leaving any of my cats behind. I get upset even thinking about it. I don't understand why some people [those types of people] get a cat or a dog. "OH a cute baby animal..." Jeez. It's like they totally forget that babies grow into adults at some point. I can't stand it.


----------



## RachelMC (Jun 30, 2011)

I'm glad for this thread. My sister is having her first baby, she will be 37 weeks tomorrow. A few months ago someone sat a kitten out at her house. Her heart melted for it. She's a lot like me, she took her in. Just a couple days after, my sister noticed something unusual about Sadie [her kitten] and called me immediately to ask what it was. Sadie had a wolf worm, we took care of her, she's happy and healthy now.  I'm getting off topic a little, just wanted to give a back story for it. So, my sister is very attached to Sadie now, naturally. I was just thinking a couple days ago.. I wonder what people normally do with a new baby in the house if they have an indoors kitty, which is what Sadie is.
Sadie is, at first, extremely shy, you could call her a scaredy-cat..but then she becomes extremely playful. Nibbling and attacking everything that moves. When I first met her, she hid behind a door in my sister's bedroom for about an hour, slowly she came out into the opening of the living room, by the end of the night all she wanted to do was play with my foot. 
So, what would be the best thing for my sister to do to prepare for having both Sadie and the baby?


----------



## praline (Jun 3, 2011)

I can give you some ideas but know that it can be difficult with a newborn so your sister better be prepared. Babies without pets are extremely stressful 

Sadie will need her own space. A space the baby is never ever allowed to be (even as a toddler). This can be a back bedroom, a converted closet or bathroom. She can get a pet baby gate and anchor and secure it very well (I am mending a broken kitten due to us not anchoring ours well enough)
Here is a photo of a gate like this:
Extra-tall Walk-through Metal Gate w/Small Pet Door - Gates & Doors - Dog - PetSmart

This is where Sadie should feel safe from the screaming crying beastie. 
When human beastie crawls and walks, this will give Sadie a place to retreat.

Food dishes and litter boxes MUST be out of reach of the baby ~ obviously lol but not in the same room or area. Fecal matter, regardless of what animal dropped it, has tons of germs that can get on the baby. Cat food can also have a ton of food born diseases. With a newborn this is extremely important. Always wash up after treating, feeding and of course cleaning the litter box. 

Keep cat toys as baby proof as possible. A cat who leaves a harmless toy ball with a bell inside can choke a nosey toddler to death

One of the myths discussed here about cats jumping in the crib and smothering the baby ( Becky this is most likey what Nutmeg did since you have described her so well..if she did anything at all)
Yes, cats have smothered babies. Its not a myth. They are not doing it to kill the infant. Many tired, worn out young parents will leave a bottle of formula in the crib. The baby might have fallen asleep with it in her mouth and the parents didn't want to risk taking it and waking her up.
Formula has a milk base and cats love it. They will jump into the crib and sit on the newborn while sucking down the bottle, unknowingly smothering the baby. Becky, if Nutmeg did do this, when you decide to have your own child be very careful with her around bottles, just to be safe. No sense risking it with your newborn baby... if your planning on kids. 


There is something we did with Savannah's bedroom door when she was born. Does sis own her own home? We cut Savannah's door in half, leaving the top exposed so we could see her easily but dogs and cats could not get in. My husband cut the door in half and placed the fixtures lower on the door frame. When she got older we bought a new door for about 20-30 bucks. Home Depot sells them super cheap without door knobs. We just swapped the door knob out. It was the best idea I ever had when it came to pets and infants.

You do want to teach her not to go in the baby room. Pets in the kids' room is a huge NO NO until the kid is 4 or 5. There are a million reasons why. Newborns (not 6 or 12 month old babies) have very delicate lungs. They are still developing those first weeks after being born. Pets have dander and if the pet lays all over the baby stuff it can create lung issues. 
There is also the risk of the cat jumping in the crib and snuggling the baby or stealing the bottle and potentially hurting an infant that can't even roll over yet. As they get older, babies and toddlers have mean streaks lol they don't mean to but when mama isn't watching they like to pull tails and explore teeth and everything a pet has the kid doesn't. Pets do not like this! Your sis wants to monitor any interaction well until the kid is 4. Yes, teach the child to be nice but don't depend on it until they can use reason.


----------



## Sinatra-Butters (Aug 9, 2010)

Dave_ph said:


> Normally I'd consider that absurd but having seen Nutmeg's 'Dramatic Kitty' photo...


When we read the intake form we thought the same thing, absurd! We figured they were new parents who no longer wanted the responsibility of a pet. Now I wonder if they weren't lying...



MowMow said:


> That would explain her expression. Maybe she was having a flashback of the screaming beast in the crib.


She must have daily flashbacks then. Cell phones give her the same reaction, then she chews on them and stands on them until they stop making noises.


----------



## praline (Jun 3, 2011)

Becky, did you read what I posted about Nutmeg?

There is a chance she was in the crib and it looked like smothering. Nutmeg likes her food. Some parents leave bottles in the crib when baby falls asleep sucking on them. Cats love formula and jump into the crib to get the milk and end up sitting on the newborn.

Had she done anything (which we don't know with any certainty) she could have been doing that.


----------



## Sinatra-Butters (Aug 9, 2010)

No, I missed what you were saying because I thought you were just giving advice to someone who needs baby/cat advice. I don't have a baby. 

I think she probably just hated the baby. Knowing her it doesn't surprise me. She hates any and all noise and probably wanted to shut the crying thing up. I won't have to worry about her smothering any babies because unless it is an "oopsie" I don't really want kids, babies are like small drunk people.


----------



## praline (Jun 3, 2011)

If it weren't for "oopies" humans would be endangered


----------



## MowMow (Nov 6, 2010)

praline said:


> If it weren't for "oopies" humans would be endangered


Not a bad thing, imo. Not likely though, there are still lots of people who feel the need to reproduce and force their obnoxious mini-mes on the world.

I actually discussed this with my mom today when we talked on the phone.

She blew it off with a "what was the big deal? I did what had to be done? I didn't want a pat on the back or a medal for it."

My mom did bookeeping for a large business, worked part time for the dept. of education and helped my dad on the farm at the time I was born and she had my 5 and 10 year old brothers to take care of. She agreed it was a busy time and said that a cat or two and some dogs in the house were the least of her work. 

My parents raised and trained champion field dogs as well as working bird dogs so there were always adult dogs milling around the house and once or twice a year there was a litter of puppies being house trained before they went to their new homes.

I'm pretty certain we weren't crawling through filth but according to my mother Illushka(sp?) always had wet ears from me chewing/sucking on them. I have a scar or two from pulling Princess' tail or ears too many times. From the time I came out of my crib I had a dog sleeping under the covers with me until I divorced and my ex got custody of Luna so.... about 30 years..? I certainly never suffered from lung problems.

As my mom put it, "we could have raised you in plastic bubbles but we decided we had kids and not hamsters."


----------



## MowMow (Nov 6, 2010)

praline said:


> There is a chance she was in the crib and it looked like smothering. Nutmeg likes her food. Some parents leave bottles in the crib when baby falls asleep sucking on them. Cats love formula and jump into the crib to get the milk and end up sitting on the newborn.



Sorry for double post, was too late to edit.

It's more likely the future parents read some alarmist forum post and freaked out instead of just using common sense.


----------



## Sinatra-Butters (Aug 9, 2010)

My parents got pets before I was born and I don't think they thought it was that hard. Instead of getting rid of animals or kids my mom got more (Just me and the cats as an addition to the dogs and my sister, this isn't 17 kids and counting..)! She also worked 3 jobs because my dad didn't pay child support for me or my sister and we spent a lot of time sleeping with animals as well, I'm pretty okay!


----------



## Dave_ph (Jul 7, 2009)

Or Nutmeg may have just been cuddling up and someone freaked.


----------



## Sinatra-Butters (Aug 9, 2010)

I doubt she was cuddling. She isn't much of a cuddle girl, she likes playing much more.


----------

