# Resident cat terrified of new kitten



## ladylilith (Sep 25, 2008)

My 8 m.o. kitten can't wait to meet my adult Himalayan cat. The kitten is meowing and complaining in the guest room right now because she wants to meet my other cat so badly! I've had the kitten for almost 2 weeks now and I've been getting the two accustomed to each others' smells using towels, etc. and all has gone reasonably well until now.

Today I tried letting the kitten out and putting my adult cat in the kitten's room. She was absolutely terrified, the likes of which I've never seen out of her, and she is a fearful cat by nature... she stayed near the door and just meowed and growled pathetically, even though the kitten is friendly and curious and just wants to meet her. 

Several times I have opened the door a tiny crack with one cat on either side. The kitten is always good-natured and friendly, but my Himalayan hisses repeatedly. However, when the door is closed, the Himalayan will sit by the door and listen to what the kitten is doing, as if she is interested. 

The kitten is ultra sweet and loves attention, and I'm getting tired of keeping her cooped up in the guest room. My Himalayan's fickle behavior is really starting to irritate the **** out of me. She acts interested yet hisses and bolts when I give her the chance to see the kitten. I'm getting rather fed up with her.

Should I be punishing this behavior? What steps should I take next?


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## doodlebug (May 13, 2006)

No, don't punish her, she's only doing what comes naturally. Since you've been going through all the normal processes, I would say the next step should be to put the kitten in a carrier in the kittens room and let your existing cat come in and investigate.

There is going to be hissing. The main goal of an introduction is to eliminate aggression, get them in a room and not have a fight. If they can co-exist with a little hissing it will work itself out. When I brought Holly in, Maggie would hiss whenever she saw her, but eventually she would let her get closer without hissing and only hissed when Holly got in her personal space. A hiss is a warning, it's a 'stay away from me kid'. The kitten will understand and back off, eventually her charm and exuberance should win over the other cat.

BTW, it would be easier to respond if we had names :lol:


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## ladylilith (Sep 25, 2008)

Sorry, the Himalayan is Lilith and the kitten is Loona. :lol: 

Lilith has been hiding under the bed ever since 'the incident' earlier today, it looks like. I went out and ran some errands, and bought a bottle of Rescue Remedy and gave her some when I came home less than an hour ago, but she immediately went back under and hasn't come out yet.

I'm rather disappointed by her behavior... I really thought we were past this hiding under the bed nonsense. She's been exposed to Loona's scent for over two weeks now (since before I even brought her home). I'm getting really tired of leaving the kitten in the guest room, because she cries/whines and gets lonely in there. I want her in my room with me


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## doodlebug (May 13, 2006)

You can try some Feliway room diffusers. They contain a synthetic pheromone that is supposed to be comforting to cats.


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## Jadedea Jade (Feb 3, 2009)

Im sorry things arent working out for you. I just wanted to let you know you are not alone. Im in the same situation except its been 3 months now. The resident cat name is azores and the newbie is jadedea. Azores seems to be constantly upset about her presence and meows more than anything. We have the feliway diffusers but that didn’t work and I got spirit essences and it seems to work for jadedea but not for azores. When I give them the spirit essences, jadedea immediately wants to get close to azores and get to know her, but azores freaks out hisses and sometimes attack jade. We tried to reintroduce them, failed, swap scents, fail, and everything else. Jade is willing to accept azores but azores has problems. And just like you, having one of them locked up in the room gets annoying and worrysome. They both cry and scratch the doors all day.

Im starting to wonder what will be worse. Locking them up and hearing them cry all night long and day, or letting them loose and hearing them fight each other all day and night long?

If the feliway doesn’t work, give spirit essence a try!


hth


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## doodlebug (May 13, 2006)

Are they actually fighting or is it just some hissing and spitting and swatting? There's a big difference, fighting includes eerie moans, growls and the fur literally flies. If it's the latter then let them work it between them, keeping them separated isn't going to help.


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## ladylilith (Sep 25, 2008)

Thanks, I think I will try a couple more times, then buy the Feliway if things still don't work out.

Doodlebug: I haven't let them be physically next to each other yet, only through the crack in the door. Lilith (the adult) was hissing and doing that 'eerie moan' type of thing. I am waiting to take Lilith to the groomer tomorrow, where she is going to get a nail trim, before letting them come face to face. 

Lilith's behavior really doesn't make sense to me... I mean, she knows the kitten is here. She can hear and smell the kitten... she has seen the kitten before, and she even sits outside the door for periods of time, listening... yet when they actually see each other, she freaks out? :roll: 

I think I will try bringing the kitten in a carrier, and see how Lilith reacts. Probably badly, but it's worth a try I guess.


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## doodlebug (May 13, 2006)

Sorry Ladylilith, I was answering the post above mine. I still think putting Loona in the carrier is the next step. But wait at least a day or two after Lilith goes to the groomer, that's traumatic, give her time to recover before taking the next step on the intro. Make sure to let Loona roam the house while Lilith is at the groomer, getting her scent all over everything...


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## ladylilith (Sep 25, 2008)

Yeah, this is her first time to the groomer... her "mane" has some matting in it, but I hope it's not serious enough to warrant a lion cut, otherwise nobody will be able to take her seriously any more :mrgreen: 

I am planning to give her Rescue Remedy before the car trip, then cross my fingers and hope for the best. She is so fearful of new/different things, and she really freaks herself out in the car  Trembling, panting, drooling... the works.


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## Jadedea Jade (Feb 3, 2009)

its sort of what your talking about. i hear the moans, ive seen the fur fly and ive seen them swatting. sometimes jade gets on her hind legs to defend herself.

now are they rolling in the dirt biting each other? nope. but they are doing some fierce swatting then. both have scratches on their face, surface punctures. azores isnt losing fur but jade is. but jade is a long hair, so i guess its kind of hard not too. but there are days when you hear the growling, the hissing and the loud screeching and then you hear that one cray that makes you want to get up, and sure enough, youll see a new scratch in the fur. afterwards they chase each other. this morning for 2 hours they did that, chase, swatting, hissing.

sometimes its because jade likes to stand somewhere where azores needs to walk by, and instead of just walking by, she starts a fight.


so is that fighting or just swatting, and is it normal? i have a post on hear that talks about it, if you want to get into more detail so this doesnt take over lady's post.


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## ladylilith (Sep 25, 2008)

Haha, I don't mind!

Just an update, I took Lilith to the groomer today, after administering some Rescue Remedy before the car trip and she was extremely brave. The whole de-matting only took about 10-15 mins, and she got her nails trimmed too. It was very fast and simple and she was very well-mannered. She's already come out from under the bed and is being her normal self. I think that Rescue Remedy stuff must really work 8O 

Unfortunately Loona seems to have taken ill with the URI again. She is sneezing more and I noticed her left eye is weepy with some eye boogers, and I had to wipe her eye/nose. I suppose this will delay their meeting further. *sigh* Our refrigerator broke, so I think the Clavamox went bad and I wasn't able to finish the bottle, which is probably why she relapsed.


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## ladylilith (Sep 25, 2008)

Today I got sick of keeping them separated and decided to let them meet face to face, after days of "door crack" meetings and Loona-in-carrier meetings which were never at all fruitful.

I let Loona in my room, and Lilith freaked out, hissed and ran under the bed. We pulled her out and fed some of her favorite treats, then brought Loona in again. This time Lilith jumped up on her window perch, ears flat and hissed. Loona tried to jump up there with her and she was of course shoved off, and Lilith started doing that creepy "moaning" thing and hissing some more.

It's been pretty stressful on my family and I, keeping the two of them separated as Loona's room (the guest room) is basically empty besides some junk and boxes... the only proper way to spend time with her is to let her out into the house so she can get some exercise... and then I have to shut Lilith in my bedroom, where she sits by the door waiting for it to open so SHE can get out and go roam the house. Lilith is left feeling left out while Loona gets the run of the house, and vice versa.

I'm sick of door-guarding and hearing Loona cry at the top of her lungs when she wants attention, and not being able to give it to her at the risk of making Lilith feel jealous or left out. I'm coming to terms with the fact that Lilith is an extremely difficult cat to get along with, as she is ridiculously slow to warm up and is terrified of almost everything... I guess I'm just worrying that this isn't going to work out. Honestly, if I waited for Lilith to respond to Loona "affectionately," I may have to wait my entire life, because Lilith just isn't LIKE that.

Has anyone else dealt with an extremely fearful, change-resistant cat like this? I feel like I'm going crazy...


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## ladylilith (Sep 25, 2008)

Poo, I was hoping for some replies/advice today but I suppose since it's Easter everyone is busy with family and whatnot :lol:


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## Muzby (Jan 9, 2008)

I know most people may not like my advice, but at this point, since no one is attacking.. I would let them work it out. If you keep interferring and they feel your tension and being upset, it will just make this worse.

Let Lillith and Loona have free access to the whole house. Let the kitten learn that the BIG QUEEN of the house has her boundaries, and if it takes a few swats or a whole bunch of hisses, you're doing well. atback


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## ladylilith (Sep 25, 2008)

We've been having daily "meetings." I recall Lilith undergoing a "demonic transformation" upon Loona merely entering my bedroom. Now, it takes Loona getting within a 2-foot radius of Lilith in order for the evil transformation to take place. :dis 

If Loona comes too close Lilith's ears flatten, she hisses repeatedly, swats at her, then moans all creepy, repeat cycle. Loona loses interest and walks away when she receives said mean treatment. She's a pretty good sport about the whole thing and still seems to want to make friends. She is very sweet.

Lilith had previously been hiding in my room exclusively (in the corner of my bed behind pillows/blankets since we blockaded the route to 'under the bed'), but she comes downstairs with me a bit now.

I suppose it's an improvement, but they're far from friends yet. I was getting very upset at the idea of having to give one of them up, so hopefully Lilith will continue to take those baby steps...


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## love.my.cats (Jan 29, 2009)

Maybe you should still try the Feliway. It seems you are making progress but if the Feliway helps calm Lilith down a little, it may help things pogress even futher..


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## ladylilith (Sep 25, 2008)

Here are a couple of photos I took last night during "the daily meeting":









Lilith's facial expression changes when Loona enters the room (her normal, surprised-looking face is my avatar)









Lilith when Loona is getting too close









A typical scenario

I was hoping to not have to drop any more money on Lilith's nonsense, but I will try the Feliway soon if progress comes to a halt.


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## worthin8 (Apr 18, 2009)

Sounds like it's working better for you though...give it time and I'm sure they will be friends soon! They are adorable cats by the way  Lilith makes the face like mine does when the dog comes around. It's the 'I'm uncomfortable and very aware face.' ... I don't know why, but I think cats are just picky creatures and want the house to themselves for the most part. But give it time, they will be friends soon enough! Good luck! 8)


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## ladylilith (Sep 25, 2008)

Hi all, I believe I have made a small amount of progress. Lilith still hides under the bed and hisses/does the creepy moan thing when Loona gets too close, but I feel that Loona is able to get a bit closer now before eliciting a reaction.

Unfortunately, they still don't get along, and I think that Loona is starting to get sick of all this curmudgeon-ish behavior, as am I. :|


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## ladylilith (Sep 25, 2008)

Alright, I finally threw in the towel and bought some Feliway from amazon.com just now. Lilith's attitude doesn't seem to be improving


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