# Need Help With Benny



## Digikid (Feb 27, 2011)

Hey there.

I love Benny a lot....but he is getting to be way too much for me and he seems to be completely either dumb or untrainable.

Here are a few scenarios:

1.) When I go to the washroom to pee ( I am male for those who do not know ) he wants to get in the way. I push him away with a strong and loud NO and he just does it again and again.

2.) When I am going to leave he dashes for the door. I then spend the next ten minutes trying to get him to get away. Every single time I say no louder and louder and sometimes even yell right in his face....he will not listen. One time I kinda threw him away and BARELY got the door closed.

3.) If I am sitting in my favorite chair ( a rocker ) he goes under the chair and since I am so afraid of him getting hurt I pull him out and do the same punishment routine.....and he just dives under again until I literally throw him out of the room and slam the door on him.

4.) He will NOT stay off the kitchen counters or stove no matter what I do to deter him.


Here is my "Punishment Routines"
*
First Offense:* Loud NO at close range.
*Second offense:* Pick him up and say no once again more loudly at face range.
*Third offense:* a quick but light slap across the back legs
*Forth offense:* a really loud stomp of my foot and a VERY loud tiger like hiss.

_*NOTHING WORKS*_....well the hissing thing makes him look scared but 30 seconds later he is doing it again.

I am feeling like I am abusing him....which I do not want but he is pissing me off so much at times. I do not want to get rid of him but he is REALLY testing my limits. 7 month Kitten or not. My previous cat was no where near this much trouble.

Water does NOT do anything to him either....he LOVES water.

Please help me out here. I have already bonded with him and he is a sweetie but he needs to be trained!!!!

_edited by Heather102180: Changed title per Digikid's request._


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## jusjim (Jun 30, 2009)

Poor, poor Benny. Gently turn him away from the bathroom with a soft 'no' and close the bathroom door.

There's so much you need to learn about cats. No hitting, even lightly. It doesn't work and shouldn't be necessary. They are not human and do not understand. I doubt he's dumb or stupid.

There is, I think a behaviour board. Try posting a 'How do I' message.

Maybe you should give up on the poor cat and return him so that the girl who was so disappointed has chance to adopt.


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## swimkris (Jul 17, 2010)

Well, first kittens are harder than cats, especially 7 mo olds because that is about the time they start "testing the waters" like a human child would. Second, you've overused "no" and he probably just ignores it now. Third, you can't just make a cat stop doing something that it wants to do; instead, you have to modify or substitute the behavior for something else. 

1. Do not allow him in the bathroom with you. He might whine, but he will get over it eventually.
2. I used to have this same problem, but then I started feeding my cats right before I leave to go to work (the very last thing). After they got in this routine, they haven't bugged me about it since.
3. Keep some pole toys and/or a bag of treats near your fav chair to lure him out and get him focused on something else. Yelling/pulling him out will just make him more determined to hide under there.
4. Most cats get on the counters/stove. Get used to having a container of clorox wipes nearby for quick sanitation. You can hiss/scoot him off whenever you see him do it, but that is no guarantee that he isn't getting back up there the second you leave the house.


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## MowMow (Nov 6, 2010)

I have to agree with jusjim. Perhaps you should go ahead and give Benny up to someone who is has the patience to work with him. Hitting is not going to work and for an adult man to hit a small kitten, no matter how lightly you think it is has to hurt/bruise him.

You're trying to compare an inquisitive playful and energetic kitten to an older cat that has died. It's apples and oranges. You could try adopting a more laid back adult cat that is happy to stay out of your way.


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## Digikid (Feb 27, 2011)

jusjim said:


> Poor, poor Benny. Gently turn him away from the bathroom with a soft 'no' and close the bathroom door.
> 
> There's so much you need to learn about cats. No hitting, even lightly. It doesn't work and shouldn't be necessary. They are not human and do not understand. I doubt he's dumb or stupid.
> 
> ...


Whoa there bud. I am sorry but it sounds like you are blaming me....Let me get this straight. *I LOVE BENNY*!! I would do nothing to hurt him. I do not believe in dumb or stupid cats either....they just give that impression at times....and as the flawed species called HUMANS I will admit that we have a nasty habit of pitting our...how should I put this....habits on other animals.

I appreciate your response...but try to understand that I am not raised a kitten in 14 years.....things may have gotten "rusty". When I say give up....I do not mean returning him to the shelter. He is mine....and mine he stays.



swimkris said:


> Well, first kittens are harder than cats, especially 7 mo olds because that is about the time they start "testing the waters" like a human child would. Second, you've overused "no" and he probably just ignores it now. Third, you can't just make a cat stop doing something that it wants to do; instead, you have to modify or substitute the behavior for something else.
> 
> 1. Do not allow him in the bathroom with you. He might whine, but he will get over it eventually.
> 2. I used to have this same problem, but then I started feeding my cats right before I leave to go to work (the very last thing). After they got in this routine, they haven't bugged me about it since.
> ...


1.) His litter is in the bathroom. You CANNOT stop a cat from going into a room.
2.) Tried that. Did not work.
3.) Its an idea. Thanks.
4.) Citrus smells do not help. He seems to LIKE it.



MowMow said:


> I have to agree with jusjim. Perhaps you should go ahead and give Benny up to someone who is has the patience to work with him. Hitting is not going to work and for an adult man to hit a small kitten, no matter how lightly you think it is has to hurt/bruise him.
> 
> You're trying to compare an inquisitive playful and energetic kitten to an older cat that has died. It's apples and oranges. You could try adopting a more laid back adult cat that is happy to stay out of your way.


Sorry Mowmow...not an option. He is mine and mine he stays. I am a VERY patient man. Please do not make me out to be an impatient man as I am not.


I think all of you misunderstand what I mean by swatting him. I take a finger...ONE finger and LIGHTLY tap his hind leg section. He does not like that and in past cats it taught them to behave.

Okay I may have to adjust some tactics here and there. You are correct in one manner though. He is a kitten still....I have to learn to put up with that until he is capable of learning the rules I guess.


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## Cat24 (Mar 18, 2010)

1) it is possible to close the door on the cat when you are going in to use the washroom, I did it with 5 kittens and a mama cat as well as my two dogs and many cats in the past, put him outside the door and close it - no more issues when you're using the washroom, he can meow pitifully, but it's not necessary for him to be in there when you're using the toilet.

2) depending on how you feed(free feed vs. portions) it might help if it was a higher value treat/food that you give before you leave - freezedried chicken (pure treats or somesuch) works wonders for all of our cats, and make that the only time he gets said treat. 

3) distraction works better than physical force with cats, the toys are the way to go...even just a shoe string would likely work.

4) they're not suggesting that you discourage his counter surfing with smells, rather that you be prepared to wipe down the counter whenever you use it because you won't be able to keep him off the counter when you're not there.


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## Digikid (Feb 27, 2011)

Cat24 said:


> 1) it is possible to close the door on the cat when you are going in to use the washroom, I did it with 5 kittens and a mama cat as well as my two dogs and many cats in the past, put him outside the door and close it - no more issues when you're using the washroom, he can meow pitifully, but it's not necessary for him to be in there when you're using the toilet.
> 
> 2) depending on how you feed(free feed vs. portions) it might help if it was a higher value treat/food that you give before you leave - freezedried chicken (pure treats or somesuch) works wonders for all of our cats, and make that the only time he gets said treat.
> 
> ...


Thanks for the advice.


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## Carmel (Nov 23, 2010)

You can't blame people for taking what you've said the wrong way, several things you've said are not worded with much room for interpretation: 

"Seriously thinking of giving up on Benny" - it's your thread title too, "he seems to be completely either dumb or untrainable" - you've only had him a few weeks and he's young, "I literally throw him out of the room and slam the door on him" - sounds like a temper. You're dealing with a youngster, no matter the species, they're full of it and a handful at the best of times. You can't always get your way with cats, you have to compromise. 

1) You're saying "no" too much. It's lost its meaning. If you don't want him in the bathroom with you, close the door when you use it. A lot of cats like following people in the bathroom. 

2) He sounds like he's full of energy, a lot of cats make a dash for it when you leave... I would try for set feeding times with a food he likes, put the food down when you leave; you said this didn't work but I have to wonder how long you tired as you haven't had him very long. 

3.) How about, for now, you block off the ability to go under the rocker? Or don't sit in it for now if it worries you so much. Or, if he does get hurt under there (can't imagine it would be anything major), he should learn to keep away. Or put double sided tape under there. 

4.) A lot of cats jump on counters. Mine don't thankfully, but I know plenty that do. People learn to live with this. You can say no all you want, it doesn't always work. Some cats just like high up places and/or like to see what you're doing up there. Keep an orange peel handy for when he jumps up there, or spay the counter with a scent he doesn't like. I've read bitter apple works. You could also try double sided tape.


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## MinkaMuffin (Apr 1, 2011)

"You CANNOT stop a cat from going into a room."
Uhh, its called physically blocking them?

It sounds like you are having a problem similar to someone else that posted on here; it sounds like Benny was never taught any manners by his mommy.

Since I usually go by 'train cats the way their mommys would' and that entails hissing and such, but that doesnt seem to work, why don't you try Positive reinforcement? Carry treats around with you, when he tries to get in a room you don't want him to, gently push him into a laying position, say 'stay' and place a treat in front of him, and then go inside the room.

Also, instead of throwing him away, why don't you put him on your lap when in your favourite chair?


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## marie73 (Jul 12, 2006)

Digikid,

Imagine having TWO Bennys!!!! I adopted the twins when they were almost 10 weeks old, and 4 years later, they're still little bratz. I still can't put my curtains back up because Charlee will climb up them, no matter what I do. 

There was definitely an attitude adjustment needed, but it was _mine_. Cali can open my childproof cabinets. She goes through phases, she's not always trying to open them. When she starts doing it again, I tape them shut, and she gives up after a couple days. But when she pulls the food cabinet open, she will look me right in the eye and start knocking my spices off the lazy susan, one at a time. 

"Cali!"

Bop - there goes your Cajun spice.

"Stop it, Cali!!"

Bop - there goes the onion powder.

"CALI!!!!!!! Don't make me get up!"

Bop - oops, now your pepper is seasoning up your floor!

I stand up and she flies through the air with the greatest of tease.

BRAT! And the spray bottle doesn't work on her either. She'll squeeze her eyes shut and wait for the squirt. Then go right on being a brat.

Most of the time, it's hard being mad at someone when you're laughing. Being cute lets you get away with a lot. I'm sure you feel the same way about Benny.

I finally had to put away my nice (breakable) things and realize I wanted the bratz more than a quiet home with nice stuff. Seriously - I had to take my painting off the wall because they could reach it by standing on the back of the love seat. 

I gave up on keeping them off the counters long ago. I keep the counters boring, so when they do hop up there, there's nothing fun to get into. 

They used to be door dashers, but after I accidently bopped them on the nose coming inside one day, they back up now when I'm opening it. (Not that I would suggest doing that, it just happened.) But throwing Benny's favorite toy or a couple of his favorite treats across the room when you're leaving may help.

It'll get better, but it does take a little time.




> gently push him into a laying position, say 'stay'


Cali and Charlee are laughing so hard at this, tuna is coming out of their noses!


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## Arkadia (Apr 11, 2011)

Your thread title states you're 'seriously thinking of giving up on Benny' but you claim you're keeping him no matter what. What does 'giving up on him' entail?

You are trying to over-discipline a kitten. They WILL grow out of 99% of the irritating things they do. I've had well over a dozen kittens and I've found the best approach is to tolerate them as much as humanly possible - whatever frustrating behavior they're doing, let them 'get it out' - don't give them a reaction. Often, they're doing it for attention. How much *positive* attention do you pay to Benny? Does he get a lot more attention from you when he's doing something naughty? This can very likely be why he is so persistent - if he knows you'll pay attention to him and interact with him if he does certain behaviors, he'll be likely to do them more, especially when he doesn't particularly mind the 'punishment' you're giving him.

I very much don't approve of the way you're going about 'disciplining' him, although I am not a fan of negative reinforcement at all, so I suppose that is a given. When my cats are doing things I dislike I try to distract them and then reward them. Food, treats and toys are all good methods of distraction.

You might want to look into clicker training. It is a relatively easy and quick way to teach/train 'untrainable' cats and can be used to alter all sorts of undesirable behaviors. It will take some time and patience, but I've never heard of a cat who was unresponsive to properly performed clicker training and it strengthens the bond between human/cat as well.


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## catnapped (Nov 11, 2010)

I agree with Marie. You probably need to adapt a bit yourself instead of trying to discipline Benny! Cats only break rules when you have rules. I let Genie do anything she wants in terms of walking on counters, running around madly, following me to the toilet, etc. (most cats seem to be obsessed by toilets) and she's turned out to be very well-behaved in the ways that really matter, i.e. using the litter box, sleeping (mostly) when we sleep. Most of our little household rules no doubt seem pretty arbitrary to kittens. It's great that you've bonded already, just chill out a bit. Good luck, I'm sure you'll get used to each other


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## Digikid (Feb 27, 2011)

Sorry guys. Had a bad day and lashed out at some of you. I tried to reedit the title but it would not take.

It appears that all is fine with Benny. He still purrs like crazy when I am around and sleeps on me. The breaking straw was when I was going down my stairs and he decided to run out in front of me unexpectedly and I kicked him midside. Hope that he is okay there. These things happen.

Looks like I do not to stop comparing Benny to Mena. I realized that is what I have been doing all this while.....and it is gonna stop here and now.

Thanks to all that "helped" and to Marie in particular who is going through the same thing 2x and understands.

/thread.


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## Greenport ferals (Oct 30, 2010)

I have had many, many kittens in my house...I was never bothered by anything they did. Digikid, I think your heart is in the right place, but if I'm reading this right, you are irritated by typical kittenish behavior. 
I agree with the previous - ligthen up on the kitty. Enjoy him for his high spirits - that's the way kittens are.


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## ShadowsRescue (Mar 7, 2011)

A tip for getting out the door... Get some really good treats or even some canned tuna. Use the treats or tuna only when you are leaving. Make sure you give the treat or tuna away from the door. I always leave Jake a small treat when I am leaving. He looks forward to it. It will soon become a routine that Benny will learn to enjoy.

Kittens have tons of energy. Do you have a laser light or a feather wand to play with him. Getting him good and tired before you leave is another great tip. We found that a cat tree is a great investment. Jake can scratch on it, hide in it, play on it and of course sleep on it. I believe there is a thread on cat trees right now!

Good luck. Kittens are tons of work.

Oh, getting cats of the counters... let me know if you find anything that works. We tried tape, foil, spraying with water, taking him off and removing him from the kitchn. Nothing works.


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## faithless (Dec 4, 2009)

You just have to think up ways to modify his behavior that works for him by trial and error. I agree with everyone else, you cant punish them. When my gal used to try to sneak out the door when I left, I had to throw a toy for her to run after and then quickly sneak out. Now she doesnt ever try that anymore. Also, she is *extremely* routine-orientated, anything that becomes routine is the way she will continue to want things, so being completely consistent, from my experience, is the way to change cats behaviors.


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## LeeLuMonster (Jan 9, 2011)

try upside down carpet runners (the plastic ones with the "pickys" on the underside) and lay them on your counter. My breeder swears by them and she has 10 kittys who don't jump on the counter anymore. I haven't had to resortto that, Leelu's not a counter jumper so I haven't 'seen' it in action per se.
Good luck!


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## faithless (Dec 4, 2009)

yeah, sticky tape is good.


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## tghsmith (Dec 9, 2010)

the treats are about the only adjustment tool that seems to work for mine, yeti started hiding when I was in the final stages of getting ready to leave for work, he didn't want to get locked up for the hour or two before my wife gets up,, started using treats and now he runs to the room when i get ready to leave..


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## Digikid (Feb 27, 2011)

LeeLuMonster said:


> try upside down carpet runners (the plastic ones with the "pickys" on the underside) and lay them on your counter. My breeder swears by them and she has 10 kittys who don't jump on the counter anymore. I haven't had to resortto that, Leelu's not a counter jumper so I haven't 'seen' it in action per se.
> Good luck!



That is an EXCELLENT idea!


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## Fyreflie (Mar 5, 2011)

Digikid--sounds like you have your hands full! We got our kitten after getting a slightly older, neutered male who is teaching him the ropes and showing him how to behave. 

This might sound crazy, but it sounds like Benny is lonely for company--have you thought about getting him an older friend who is a bit better behaved? Not everyone can but our little monster, Atlas (who has developed a habit of jumping up onto tables, counters, and desks, and knocking everything off of them one by one, anything he can move goes on the floor) is always learning from Wicket and has been getting (slooooowly) a little better behaved! 

As for the bathroom....I don't know why they're all so obsessed with that area of things but I have to close my door if they don't leave me alone! It's like they want to offer support. Just be glad he goes in his litterbox!  

Good luck with Benny, and don't worry, I'll bet he'll settle a little bit as he gets older. IT's like having a teenager who always wants to do everything you don't want them to! Maybe a bit of reverse psychology would work?


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