# Big Hurdle!



## BamMcg (Apr 25, 2005)

We made some real progress in the last few days with the unsocial Siamese cat I've been fostering. We've named her Missy, short for Miss Hiss. The biggest was just a few minutes ago. We decided to tie the end of her leash to the sliding glass door handle, leave her some food and water and her box with a few toys and a scratching post with a hole for hiding as we were home all day. We also moved anything that she might get tied up with. Anyway, she's been out all day. We've had her for weeks, close to a month. She has not lightened up enough the whole time to play even a little. Our very friendly cat, Beaver, has been trying to play with her since the begining and she finally played back for a little while! It was so exiting, hubby and I watched from a distance as not to spook her and both of us smiled the whole time. She also got a bath the day before yesterday, no easy task, but she had been sleeping in her litter box and she reeked. The water was like chocolate milk by the time we were done. Hubby had to hold the leash taught so she couldn't whip around and attack me. She has also calmed down enough to sleep in mine or hubby's lap as long as there is a blanket between us, haven't tried without one as I'm a little nervouse. She does still hiss and spit at us though when we walk near so I'm not sure how long it will take to be able to pet her or pick her up. We tried puting those soft claws on her, after I went through the feet of trimming her extremely long and sharp nails. They came off and one was pulled off so bad it bled. Little steps are better than no steps though, so we are still exited. Wish us luck. 
Thanks,
Amber


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

It sounds as if you're making great progress, Amber!


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## BamMcg (Apr 25, 2005)

Thanks. We're still trying. For a while there I really thought I was being foolish even continuing with her. She ate while on my lap last night and purred for a while, but still dislikes hubby. He tried to pick her up from my lap and she went to lash at him, which she hasn't done in a long time so I don't know what was wrong. And I slept in the living room with her last night with her still tied. Usually, she cries once in a blue moon, but I ended up having to go up to bed because she kept crying. SHe and Beaver cuddled last night, now that he's neutered(yey). I guess we just keep plugging along. (BTW, for anyone reading, I had been told by a feral rescue to only feed her on my lap and it would make the process much faster and easier, she wouldn't at first, but has recently changed her mind.)


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## Ioana (Jul 12, 2003)

It seems like you have made a lot of proggress,Bam! Thanks for keeping us updated.
What the rescue group has taught you is very true. 
I also make it a point that, the 2 feral kitties I am taming in my bathroom at the moment, they come and get the food from my hand. This is teaching them that I am somewhat close to the role their mom provided for them in the wild..and it's a positive thing to come towards me. Holding them as often as possible is another great step because that will teach them the comfort of human touch. You are doing a great job. Your husband has to slowly approach her too, as much as she'll allow him. He will gradually be able to do the same things you do with her : hold her and feed her. The more people she gets used to the better. And of course the whole process is gradually progressing and ..slowly but surely! Your husband should talk gently to her..the male voice might be intimidating for her and she probably finds him an aggressive presence. And once she'll get passed that step and allow him to be close to her, he can start offering her food as well. 
It will work out - the kitty is very fortunate to have you and your husband as foster parents.

Glad to hear you have neutered your boy. 
When is her turn to get spayed? She will mellow down considerably after that happens

Let us kow all the details of what happens next.
And congratulaions on your progress so far!


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## BamMcg (Apr 25, 2005)

Thanks, she gets spayed as soon as possible. SHe was supposed to go in on the 16th, but 4 other cats took her place, they were in need more than she was as they are going up for adoption now. She will get the next available time, I don't know when that is- it's up to the rescue place. We're still stuck in the same place but she doesn't always hiss at me now. I can pick her up right next to the sliding door, but hubby can't. I just don't want her getting used to only me, as we can't keep her. We found out we are going to korea and can only take 2 pets, we have two dogs and our cat. The cat will be staying with hubby's uncle and his elderly cat, hopfully they get along. Anyway, I still can't believe I took her in to see the rescue at the pet store and already had someone interested in adopting her, within 15 minutes, but she wasn't ready. They weren't even considering any of the poor other cats and kittens, just her. As soon as she's ready, I don't think it will take long, she is beautiful! It is very odd, she doesn't seem too pleased when I get her out, but then she'll pur on my lap, then I go to put her back and she leaps from my arms to her bed like she extatic, but then she'll cry for a little bit. She's so odd.


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

It sounds as if she really loves you. I understand that you will have to get her used to other people, though. I hope your husband soon has better luck. Does he feed her? Does she see him feed her? I imagine he has given her treats; that always helps. Perhaps you'll have to stay out of the room, and let hubby take care of her on occasion. 

It must be very difficult to give up foster cats, but it's a wonderful thing to do.


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## BamMcg (Apr 25, 2005)

He does try and "be nice to her." He changes her litter box, my cat always enjoyed someone cleaning that even more than a toy for some reason- he gets all exited. She will not eat in front of him though, but for some reason will eat in front of the kids. My oldest hand fed her a treat yesterday. She's great with the kids outside, even the neighborhood kids and moms, but still seems to hate men and especially hubby. Oh, and dogs, she hates dogs! So her best bet for a family would be no men and no dogs, but she likes other cats. She is my third foster. I had two brothers before at about 6 weeks who were feral and doing great now. They were so much easier, but very hard to give up, especially the one I thought wasn't going to survive the first night(he was extremely emaciated and could hardley stand.) But fostering has been fun and I would never get to bring another cat in to help had I not given the other ones up, so that's how I think of it. It's hard too when the rescue place says I should keep them. The brothers ended up staying at the rescue permanantly because the lady that runs the place couldn't give them up even. ANyway, I am rambling lol.


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

Don't worry about rambling; it's an interesting story. They must have been very special cats. 

I don't think it's as important that your kitty eats in front of your husband as it is for her to see that he is the "knight on the white horse" who feeds her most often. Feeding is what a mother cat would do, so it's a psychological advantage. 

Of course, if he has the patience, and you believe it's important enough, he could start the whole process over, as if she had just been brought in. You know--the dimly lit room, the soft music, your husband sitting reading and some great food which gets moved closer and closer, and ends up on his lap.  The rest of you could visit also, but not to feed her. Good luck!


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## BamMcg (Apr 25, 2005)

Well, I have until January to help her. I hope she's ready by then. Yes, the boys were very special. They were both grey tabby. If I can get this siames ready in time with some time left to spare, I have the task of taming a pure bred Russian Blue. For some reason, she all of a sudden got swarmed with pure bred cats that are either feral or unsocial. I thought it was next to unheard of at shelters to find a pure bred. Missy(the cat) is doing fine today. She was sleeping in her bed so I walked up, she opened one eye, so I scratched her on the chin and she leaned in, then I left her alone and she went back to sleep. I try and touch her a lot durring the day without actually getting her out so she gets used to whom ever just walking up for a short pet. It seems to be helping some, it has also helped with the hissing, though she still does that on occasion. Thanks for all your help and encouraging words.
Amber


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## BamMcg (Apr 25, 2005)

Just wanted to update. We had to send her back because she was a carrier for ringworm, I got it and it was the worst case ever so I had to. Well, apparently she, like many feral cats, was only attached to myself. She is fine in my presence but turns vicious when I'm not around. Kids can play with her and everything without me being scared she might bite or hiss or anything, she purrs and rubs on people and when I took her to adoption day and held her there, we aven had an offer within minutes to adopt her. But once she was back to the rescue, she turned again. The lady said she's never seen a feral so mean. The lady is on blood thinners and almost died because Missy attacked her. I feel so bad. I can't keep her since we're moving to Korea. Even if I could bring her, no airlines would even allow her to be on their plane. I feel so bad. She will now live out her life in a cattery built for all the unadoptable cats at the rescue. I guess at least she won't be uthanized.


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