# What's up with men hating cats?



## JungleKitty (Jan 4, 2004)

I am SO MAD! I just had to go and report someone to the moderator on my dog forum that I belong to. I hate being a snitch, but this guy was really pissing me off. 
I was reading a quite intense thread on the dog forum ( a few people were arguing back and forth about weather it was okay to let a puppy stay outside or not ) when I noticed that this guy's quote at the end of his message was very rude. It said : "Missing your cat? Check under my tires!"
I was outraged when I saw this. I complained about the quote to the moderator and it must of worked because the very next day I saw the his quote now read : "There sure are some nit-picky cry-babbies around here"
So I just posted back..."To whom it may concern...I'm laughing not crying."
Then I went and posted "Why do men think that it's so macho of them to hate cats?" And he replied that he's seen all sorts of animals get hit not jsut cats and that he saw it on the back of a bumper sticker and thought it was funny. Then someone else posted back that people were over reacting to the quote and he didn't like cat either.
ARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGG! What the **** is wrong with people? Why on earth would you belong to an animals lovers web site and post somethimg like that? What a red neck. (I saw pics of him in his album) Why would anyone hate cats? People are so weird.


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## Annissa (Dec 9, 2003)

My fiance was taught to hate cats by his mother. It took over three years for him to make peace with my cat. It even got to the point where he made the "it's me or your cat" ultimatum. I told him the cat was here first. Now I'll catch a sideways glance of him looking at the cat with something akin to love.

He's becoming a cat person.


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## taka (Jan 8, 2004)

*why some hate cats*

moshimoshi! or as you say in america, howdy!

I just want to say I very happy to be here. I love cats! In Japan, they are sometimes called koneko, when they are small. I believe your small cat word is kitten? is this not correct? it is not welcome for us to keep cats. they occupy space that is needed for other children, when they are allowed. sometimes you are not allowed children if you have cat. it is sad, they are beautiful. but i have a cat so it is good. but i see why people hate cat. sometimes i wish i could have children!

very happy introduction! nice meeting you!

Taka


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## Annissa (Dec 9, 2003)

Hi Taka!

Yes, we call a baby cat a kitten.


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## taka (Jan 8, 2004)

Very good! I sorry for my english. I hope to be better. to learn english is hard. but i try very hard. someday i hope to be well at it. I decide to use english dengonban I not sure of english word but maybe it is chat?

arigatou means thank you! I say arigatou to you!

Taka

I see kitten by my name. why do I have this?


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## Annissa (Dec 9, 2003)

It says "kitten" by your name because you are new to the Cat Forum. As you post your rank will get higher and the cat heads will get darker.

Your english is far better than my Japanese.  I like watching Japanese cartoons, but it's hard to learn Japanese that way. One of my favorites is "Spirited Away."

You should go to the "Say Meow" forum and introduce yourself to everyone here. I'm sure everyone else will like to say "moshimoshi" to you!


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## taka (Jan 8, 2004)

very good! I say thank you! I put chat in say meow. I did not know to chat there. thank you!

I know this spirited away. in japan it called Sen to Chihiro no kamikakushi. my favorite american movie is Lord of Rings!

thank you!

Taka


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## Lilly (Nov 8, 2003)

My husband is a big "*******" type guy. I dont mean it in a bad way, he is just very mascualin you know.... anyways he loves our animals (especially the cats) as much as I do. He never goes hunting for deer either, and most of his freinds are big hunters. I think some times men dont think it is manly of them to like cats.

We talk to our cats like they are children, and reffer to ourselves as mommy and daddy. My husband will hold the kittens and nuzzle them and then he says look mommy who is daddys girl now, just to make me jelous :wink:


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## Annissa (Dec 9, 2003)

lol, Lilly!

Justin will get down and do a major snuggle/scratch session with Sabby then look sideways at me and say slyly, "jealous?"


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## Bean (Mar 10, 2003)

taka said:


> Very good! I sorry for my english. I hope to be better. to learn english is hard. but i try very hard. someday i hope to be well at it. I decide to use english dengonban I not sure of english word but maybe it is chat?
> 
> arigatou means thank you! I say arigatou to you!
> 
> ...


I know arigatou only from a silly song from the 1980's in America - "Mr. Roboto." It's where the robot dance came from...

"Domo arigatou, Mr. Roboto...
Domo...
Domo..."

Anyway - back on track.

Actually me and all my guy friends have cats, but indeed cats are looked at as being "not macho". Kinda stupid to me. :roll: Maybe it's because cats are more likely to scratch when mad (dogs don't bite that offen), or because they don't obey commands most of the time. Or because they have a lack of patience.

I think "most" guys grow out of it after high school.


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## red_kittycat (Dec 30, 2003)

Here's my experience - people who hate cats have never lived with one. When I met my husband, right when we started dating, he was all love-stricken and all that. He told me I could have anything I wanted. And I said "Can I have 50 cats?" He told me I could have 100. He had no idea I really had 45 cats! Please trust me, I'm not a hoarder, and I have vets and friends and a rescue org that will vouch for that...but that's a different subject.

Anyway, when we decided to move in together, he started off saying he hated cats. He couldn't have known whether he liked them or not. He'd only ever had dogs. Well, he told me we couldn't have a cat. I told him if my cats didn't sleep with me, I didn't sleep with him. So I brought one of mine home (she was living with me at my mother's house before I moved in). He fell in love with her, and despite his objections, I brought another home. Fell in love with him, too, and decided to get one of his own! Now I know every time I ask if we can have another cat, he'll say no. So I don't ask anymore. I bring the cat home and say "Isn't he cute? Can we keep him?" He can't say no. He is a total cat person! He loves them like his own kids, babies them... His sister is ashamed of him :lol: She's a "dog person"...who's never had cats, either!


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## shlanon (Oct 16, 2003)

Some guys are just dumb. I don't see how you can be an animal lover of any kind and make that kind of comment. I'm not a huge fan of some animals, but I wouldn't ever make jokes about them dying.
I think sometimes cats have to grow on guys. My fiance liked cats but was not a cat lover at first. Even know I think he is holding back a little because he is afraid I will want to get more. But he does snuggle them, play with them and when I was on the phone with him once (he was with my cats while I was away) he was saying "Stormy, come talk to Mommy! Do you want to talk to Mommy, Justin?" It was sooo cute and funny because he had never referred to me as their mommy before. He also has started kissing them on top of the head the way I do.


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## Padunk (Oct 20, 2003)

I'm a male, and I love cats to death. (obviously)

I occasionally catch myself explaining to my guy friends that I'm just as much of a dog lover as I am a cat lover.. the only reason I don't have a dog right now is because I live in an apartment. I don't have a dog because a) landlord says no and b) I believe they deserve a yard to run around in. (this is all true but...)

Whenever I have a friend over for the first time, my cats are so excited to climb all over and hang out with the new person that any decent human can't leave my place and still say that they "hate" cats, lol.

I'm going to have to agree with red_kittycat, the majority of people, men or women, that "hate" cats either never knew one or had one bad experience.


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## kungfukitty (Dec 5, 2003)

If you like and have dogs you're an animal lover. If like and have cats you're the crazy cat person- lady in particular.


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## Murka (Jan 7, 2004)

Most guys grow up thinking that dogs are for men and cats are for girls. I think its wrong to think in this way. I like them both but personally think that cats are a tad bit smarter and like the fact there more independent.


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## Lilly (Nov 8, 2003)

Because my husband is slightly older than I am I jokingly tell him that when he passes away and my children are grown up, I am going to be a crazy old cat woman! ( actually I think I am already a crazy cat lady! :wink: )


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## SLUGFly (Jan 9, 2004)

Hi JungleKitty. I"m a man, 28 and I love cats. Please don't take this the wrong way, but I do think you were over-reacting about his sig. That aside, I think that men typically like dogs more because they are more loyal and obedient, usually much larger, generally easier to train and (the biggest difference between cats and dogs) don't try to usurp the man as head of the household. Cats are always the boss or they leave, their rules are pretty simple.

I think cats are however much tougher than dogs or any other animal I've ever seen. Cats are cute and cuddly yes, but the man in me sees nature at its best. I see a perfect killing machine with incredibly accurate senses, hunting instincts better than any other animal, lethal natural weapons, sedative poison, lightning reflexes. If a cat is faced with any other animal the same size or smaller then the other animal is lunch. They are our pets because we outsize them by about 10 times... and so this is why we can't have tigers, lions or even jaguars (who are the same size as dogs) or bobcats (just above poodle size) as cats, domestication has little to do with it, ask Sigried and Roy. ^^


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## Richo (Jul 4, 2003)

I've seen the bumper sticker you are referring to. Several years ago I saw it on a pickup truck outside a restaurant. Believe me, if I had a can of spray paint in my car I would have covered it up. And sure enough, the guy who came out to the truck fit the "*******" profile to a T.

Some people may think others are over-reacting to what's meant to be a joke, but the people who would put such a bumper sticker on their car/truck are the same ones who will intentionally swerve off-road to run over an animal, being a cat or anything else. You see dead animals on the side of road all the time. They don't get hit in the road and then crawl to the shoulder to die. Someone went off the road to hit them.

If anyone ever had a bumper sticker suggesting cruelty to dogs, there would be a huge public outcry... but those same people think it's OK to joke about cats.


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## Phil (Oct 31, 2003)

Well, I'm a 100% heterosexual guy and I love cats. 
My girlfriend accuses me of being a macho guy and sometimes acting all big and bad...but, that I talk to my cat like I’m a big sissy.

Ah well...


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

My sons love cats. Most guys who grow up with them love them. My oldest son, Mr. Macho- 6'4''- is really impressed by the fact that an animal that small can jump so much farther than their own height. Can you imagine a guy at the Olympics doing a high jump of 35 feet or more? That just like a cat jumping to the top of my console tv-plus vcr and cable box. Amazing!

They love dogs too. And one of my daughters has an aquarium. I guess it's in the genes! Actually, some people do verbally pass on their loves, hates, and fears to their children.


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## brandon (Dec 31, 2003)

I am a guy that likes women and cats.


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## eurocat (Jan 10, 2004)

i agree with Padunk and red_kittycat and say that people who've never had cats are the ones who supposedly "hate" them. my dad never had a cat so he decided that he hated them from an early age. he really didnt want to get a cat but in the end he gave up. now what i've noticed is not only does he still say that he "hates the **** things" but when he's alone every chance he'll get he'll be playing with the cat. 

no wonder it loves him more than anyone else in the family


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

I've seen that sort of behavior too. Former cat haters sometimes just can't admit changing, can they? :wink:


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## ForJazz (Dec 30, 2003)

Bean said:


> taka said:
> 
> 
> > Very good! I sorry for my english. I hope to be better. to learn english is hard. but i try very hard. someday i hope to be well at it. I decide to use english dengonban I not sure of english word but maybe it is chat?
> ...


MR. ROBOTO!!! Haha -- that reminds me of hanging around with my guy friends and rocking out to great 80s songs. 

I think you're right about the "growing out of it" thing -- boys who think that cats are "girly" are just immature. I mean, everyone has the right not to like cats, but if you don't like them just because they are "sissy" and you're "macho"...then that's just pipsqueak brain talking. I'm 23, and my guy friends no longer think anything about a guy wanting a cat. Lots of them have gotten one or two or three, and the others enjoy visiting with them. (Unless they are allergic of course)


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## Jessica (Jun 21, 2003)

My S/O didn't like cats when I first met him but he always pretended to because he knew I loved them. He was never cruel to them or anything but had written cats off as mean, stupid and unaffectionate for whatever reason. He tried to make peace with my cat, Benny but Ben didn't care for him and I couldn't figure out why. At the time I was under the impression that Brian liked cats but Benny saw through his charade. See, just more proof that cats are much more intelligent they lead us to believe. :wink: 

Anyway, we decided to adopt a kitten together as a step forward in our relationship. Actually it was more of my idea since he still didn't like cats much but once we brought that tiny bundle of black fur into our home, he fell in love with him and in cats in general. Now I'm the one who has to tell him "No we cannot adopt another!" and Benny likes him more than me now. Go figure... :roll:


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## ForJazz (Dec 30, 2003)

Jessica - I loved your story. I mean you're glad that your s/o likes cats now, but how annoying about Benny! j/k :lol: He totally sold you out! I'm kidding of course - it's a funny story. But that little stinker Benny giving in...pssht.  Anyway -- glad your boy came around. I bet Benny didn't like him because he could sense a liar. Cats are such smarty-pants!


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## Lori (Jun 8, 2003)

I have also seen the bumper sticker you are referring to. I will have to say it really made me dislike the guy driving the truck. :evil: 
I happen to know a lot of guys who like cats, my husband included. I agree with a lot of the others that some guys just don't think it's macho to like cats. Whatever. :roll: I don't care if they like cats or not, but I don't understand finding humor in running over a cat. I don't happen to care for dogs as a general rule, but I certainly don't have a bumper sticker threatening to run them over.


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## Padunk (Oct 20, 2003)

you know this topic reminds me of a similar one.

you ladies should enjoy it.

http://www.catforum.com/viewtopic.php?t=2379


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## MrPurryMotors (Nov 17, 2003)

I'm a guy. I've got two adorable little baby kittens, and I LOVE THEM!


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## ForJazz (Dec 30, 2003)

MrPurryMotors said:


> I'm a guy. I've got two adorable little baby kittens, and I LOVE THEM!


YOU'RE ONE OF THE GOOD ONES! Right on, man. :wink:


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## Jessica (Jun 21, 2003)

> Jessica - I loved your story. I mean you're glad that your s/o likes cats now, but how annoying about Benny! j/k He totally sold you out! I'm kidding of course - it's a funny story. But that little stinker Benny giving in...pssht. Anyway -- glad your boy came around. I bet Benny didn't like him because he could sense a liar. Cats are such smarty-pants!


I know, he's such a little stinker.  He just doesn't like me anymore because I am the one who brought the dog home so to him _I_ am the traitor.


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## sleeperalty (Jan 10, 2004)

I like cats


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## Dragon_ (Jan 11, 2004)

we all don't hate cats, my 2 have ID tags and on the back they say "Don't F*** with me, my daddy is a biker"


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## ForJazz (Dec 30, 2003)

Dragon_ said:


> we all don't hate cats, my 2 have ID tags and on the back they say "Don't F*** with me, my daddy is a biker"


That's really funny.


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## Bean (Mar 10, 2003)

Only the manliest men like us like cats. :wink:


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## ForJazz (Dec 30, 2003)

Cat lovers are my kind of men!


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## seashell (Dec 5, 2003)

*What's up with men hating cats*

Of course men who like cats aren't cissies. Clint Eastwood was seen stroking a kitten in one of the spaghetti westerns. I rest my case


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## Jessica (Jun 21, 2003)

> my 2 have ID tags and on the back they say "Don't F*** with me, my daddy is a biker"


ROTFL That's great!


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## faile (Sep 14, 2003)

my uncle is the epitome of harley men. he has two cats.


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## Ioana (Jul 12, 2003)

When we first found Frosty it was Andrew that insisted on our keeping him. I was going to keep his brother Little Mo,because he had a handicap and wanted him to have all the love he deserved; sadly he died. I didn't want to keep Frosty not only because I didn't think we were fiancially ready but also because I envisioned myself getting a dog first. Plus Frosty was so darn cute&healthy that I knew I could find a good home for him when time was going to come(for he was way too young to go when I had found him).
I have had dogs all my life and they are so dear to me. Therefore I thought I would be a better *parent* for a dog.
Of course I love animals just the same and have cared for stray cats before but I am more used to dogs. 
There you have it it depends on the circumstances - it is hard to generalize about men not liking cats. 
With Cheerio it was a different story - it was me who wanted to keep her :lol: . I wanted for Frosty to have a little sister and it was very good timing. 
One day I will also have dogs (2  ) - and I will love all of them just the same- cats and dogs- The same I have loved all of my pets because they all give back so much more.


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

They are different, but both are lovable! My dogs and cats were members of our family. How could you choose? My earliest memory was about a cat, so I had the opposite experience from yours, Ioana. Cats have been important to me since I was about three years old. Thank goodness my husband is an animal lover. If he hadn't been, my life would have been totally different. I would not have got really interested in any man who didn't love animals. Our men here are REAL men.


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## Ioana (Jul 12, 2003)

Jeanie said:


> My earliest memory was about a cat, so I had the opposite experience from yours, Ioana.


So it is in the end a matter of having some sort of experience with a certain animal. I think it would be unfair towards men to generalize in this case



Jeanie said:


> Our men here are REAL men.


You bet, Jeanie :wink: !


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## ForJazz (Dec 30, 2003)

Mine too!! My boyfriend was the one who said that if I wanted another kitten, he would get it for me as a Christmas present, we could pick out the perfect one together and it could be ours. All animals seem to love him -- it's great to watch. We have talked about rescuing a greyhound someday when we have a house.


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## shlanon (Oct 16, 2003)

Oh yeah I forgot my little brother is 16 and he loooves cats. Of course, he is not so much into being macho. I mean, he wants to be, but he's getting pretty in touch with his sensitive side now that he has a girlfriend, hehe. 
But anyway, it's fun to watch him pick up one of "his" (the family's) cats and entice them to purr. I swear, one of our cats, Pete, will purr just from you looking at him! It's awesome!  Now that I'm off on this tangent, when I get my next roll of film developed I'll post pictures of all my family's pets: Stormy's mom and brothers, her "stepdad" (he's neutered  ) and her step brother (another kitten we found from a different mom cat at around the same time we found her and her brothers). And the dog. No pictures of the cows, although I consider two of them my pets.


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## cmaijer (Jul 28, 2003)

My husband was a dog person when we met. He will now tell anyone that he is a cat person. He is daddy and I am mommy. After I got the kitten (cat #3), my older brother said I was turning into a crazy cat lady. So be it!

Speaking of bumper stickers, mine reads "My cat is smarter than your honor roll student".


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## Littlebigcatdaddy (Jan 16, 2004)

Well, I figure for my first post this would be a *perfect* place to jump in! I'm excited, so sorry for the length and breadth...

Let me tell you when I started work as a cat behavior consultant folks had some serious expectations of me when I walked into their homes. I'm a soft spoken person on the phone. I'm also 6'2", 300 lbs on a bad day, cue ball bald with a goatee. Biker looking, I guess. Some clients even said, "gee, I thought you'd be a little guy with a ponytail!" :roll: I still have no idea what associations people have when it comes to men who love cats, whether it be about their sexuality or whatever. 

I do have to say that 90% of my clients are female, and it is often that the husband/boyfriend in the relationship is less tolerant of putting up with litterbox problems or interested in putting in the work to resolve the given problem. I've always found that vexing, being a guy.

Carl Jung, in writing about sexual archetypes, said that we all have a complementary opposite side within our subconscious, the anima in males and the animus in females. Basically, when someone says that a man is in touch with his feminine side, they're referring to a well balanced anima. Anyway, one theory is that cats, being so mysterious to some, are the perfect targets for projection. A male who is "macho," or totally insecure about his anima, looks at a cat and sees that imbalance staring right back at him. Along those lines, that same man will go and get himsels a Rottie ( a male, of course), equip him with a spike collar and parade him proudly around (without neutering him, of course-must show off those testicles!) as an extension of his masculinity.

Well, all this being said, I've also seen amazing change in people's hearts when they learn about the huge spirits in the animals that they simply see as "problem behaviors" when I come to visit.
As a lot of previous posts have noted, education is everything! People who don't like cats were probably taught they didn't like cats, and consequently don't _know them_. Our fathers passed it on to us, that dogs were for boys, just like the color blue. Not to make too much of sweeping generalization, but it's what I've seen.
What a great site! I'm glad to be here. Come visit at littlebigcat.com


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## Bean (Mar 10, 2003)

Welcome!

Well - now in addition to a vet we have a cat psychologist of sorts! 

That must be an interesting job - what exactly do you do? Do you offer advice - sorta like a dog trainer in a way?


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

We ARE fortunate. Dr. Jean appears to be a colleague. It is so rare for any of us to be able to afford a behaviorist! I'm so glad you're joining us.  We appreciate the links also!


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## ForJazz (Dec 30, 2003)

Welcome littlebigcatdaddy! I see you are hyping the same site that dr. jean always talks about -- it's a great site and I've already been there a few times. I can't tell you how happy I am that you're here! I'm sure everyone will be. Dr. Jean has already proved irreplaceable here and I'm sure you'll be as well.


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## Littlebigcatdaddy (Jan 16, 2004)

Thanks for the welcome, all!
Yes, the jig's up. Doc Jean and I are in cahoots. when we formed our business we called it mind-body consultations so that between the two of us we could cover all of the bases, or at least all one could hope to!
Jean recently told me about the forum and I'm really turned on by all of what I'm seeing. I'm looking forward to participating.

To answer the question in short, yes, I'm somewhat of a cat shrink :lol: 

I work mainly by housecall, but since the website took off I do consults all over the place. Admittedly, my techniques are my own. I use much of the scientific methods employed by tried and true "behaviorists" (don't ask-the term is tied up in so much political mumbo jumbo it's not even worth explaining), but I spend time listening to the cat's needs as well. Not a communicator per se, but I'm with them nonetheless. It's worked well, anyhow, and I really consider myself blessed to say "this is my job."

Again, thanks for the welcome!!


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## Misty (Nov 14, 2003)

I'm with the theory that they've never had a cat. I was always a 'dog person'. Never interested in cats, bordering on a disike then I went to stay with my aunt in the States. She had the most adorable cat who won a place in my heart. It was the first time I had spent time with a cat. I came homw in love and found a little kitten all of my own. He's nearly 5 months old now and I adore him. He sleeps with me, watches tv with me, even brushes his teeth with me! These guys shouls have a week with a cat, they'd never be the same again  Even my very macho husband refers to himself as daddy!


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

I believe almost everyone who lives with a cat is won over. It has happened to so many people- even in my own family.


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## Richo (Jul 4, 2003)

There will always be those that are so set in their ways that they would not allow themselves to get to know a cat. I say it's their loss.


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