# Cat ducks when petted or brushed - socialization cont.



## Pattylvk (Apr 10, 2010)

I can again pet and brush my three-legged semi feral, Sir Dustin. But I’ve noticed when I touch/brush him he ducks, then relaxes and seems to enjoy the petting/brushing. He even lets me know what parts I’m supposed to brush; chin, ears, “smile”. Could he have been abused at some point? Is the relaxing perhaps akin to something that might happen if his cat mom was trying to groom him?


----------



## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

Well ... before I'd jump to abuse conclusions, I'd do some 'investigating' via observation, first.

Are you holding the brush up to him, asking his permission, for him to acknowledge with a nose-sniff or face-rub before you start brushing? 
Is the brush touching his 'feeler' whiskers and causing a reflexive avoidance action?
Is the first touch of the brush a little 'poke-y' from the bristles poking his skin?

My long-hairs will practically brush themselves, all I've got to do is hold the brush up for them to rub their faces on. When brushing any cat I always first hold the brush out to them, asking if they'd like to be brushed. If they sniff and 'present' to be brushed (_rub their face or turn their body to me with tail up_) I brush them. If they wrinkle their nose, put their ears sideways and lean away, I don't brush them because their body language is saying "no". When I do brush them, I start with the side of the brush, the non-bristle part, and slowly rotate the brush to go from smooth bristle-side to bristle-edge and finally to bristles. Cats' skin and nerve endings are sensitive so I always start out gentle and slowly work up to direct bristles. It helps their skin sort of 'relax' from the initial stimulation from the bristles. ...I think that is what you are seeing your Dustin respond to: _initial overstimulation and then relaxation as the nerve endings adjust to the stimulation of the brush._


----------



## icatguy (May 15, 2010)

Good points above......cats like having their permission asked, and that post gives some hints on how to go about doing just that.


----------



## Pattylvk (Apr 10, 2010)

Today I am really discouraged. He won’t even come close enough for me to ask his permission. He won’t come near me after the attempt to hold him to cut his claws. Last night was the Fourth and the booms from the City’s fireworks display about ¼ mile from here sent him under the sofa. I guess I’ll just keep doing what I’ve been doing, reading with him twice a day, waving the peacock feather and praying. This is his forever home and I don’t want him to spend his life scared of me. Makes me want to cry.


----------



## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

I have tamed and socialized many kittens and cats, quite a few of whom were completely feral when I began handling them. Keep the end goal in mind and use baby steps to get where you want to be. Before you know it, those baby steps will have carried you and your kitty MILES! Patient persistence pays-off. Keep the faith and practice the socialization skills the cat knows and loves, slowly introducing different ones so they seamlessly blend in with the earlier ones. Before you know it, he'll be behaving as if he was *always* a social cat!
You just need encouragement. You're doing everything right, some cats just take longer to reach. The cat works on it's *own* time-line, but you'll eventually get there with him.
h =^..^=


----------



## Pattylvk (Apr 10, 2010)

Thanks for the encouragement. He's slowly coming back around, but I still need to get his claws clipped. 

The setback was my fault. I'm not gonna try and grab him to cut claws or anything again. Not until he's real relaxed anyway....


----------



## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

Do you think he'd let you get a couple claws clipped when he's sleepy/snoozey? _Don't do it when he's sleeping, you don't want to startle him awake, but if you can catch him when he's just falling asleep and just as he's waking up, he *may* be mellow and relaxed and allow you to get a few done._


----------



## Pattylvk (Apr 10, 2010)

See the clip claws thread. I'm not gonna do it. He doesn't trust me anymore and i have to gain that back and I expect it will take awhile.


----------



## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

I skimmed through the clip claws topic. Right now, I think I'd only concentrate on socialization and trust. Nothing else. Goog things, lots and _lots_ of good things. Clipping claws may be months away, and possibly more than a year. I don't clip the claws on our cats, unless there is a problem that is causing the cat pain. _Cats have claws ... and I've never seen a reason to do any maintenance on them unless the cat couldn't do it themselves. I understand why others do it, but those reasons aren't issues for me or my household, but there may be perfectly valid reasons for others to wish to have the claws clipped._


----------



## Pattylvk (Apr 10, 2010)

Yep!!
That's what I'm gonna do!
Thanks


----------

