# how do you get your cat to like you?



## Darylmycat (Feb 27, 2006)

alright it seems that my cat doesnt like me, i feed it, i take care of it and try so hard to get the cat to love me. you try to pet it but you can tell it doesnt like it. i would love for someone to give me tips on how to get a cats trust so it will like me better. its seems my cat only likes you when thers food around you....


----------



## PrimoBabe (Feb 23, 2006)

Here's a start -- please stop referring to your cat as "it". You're talking about a living creature, not about an inanimate object.

You don't mention how long you've had your cat, or where he/she came from. Had this cat been stray, abused, or abandoned? If yes, it might take some time and patience before he/she can trust you enough to return your affection. If the cat's very new in your life, he/she might feel skittish about being handled.

How to win a cat's love? Here are a few thoughts:

1. Always talk to the cat in a kind, gentle voice. Never yell or speak in a frightening tone.

2. If you use wet food and usually have leftovers, pop the next serving in the microwave for a few seconds (cover the dish with a paper towel, to avoid splatters). Cats don't like ice-cold food from the refrigerator. In the wild, they eat warm food (not to be too gross about it, but they eat fresh kills).

3. Keep the litterbox clean and fresh. Cats are fastidious animals.

4. Your cat might begin to bond with you by kneading his/her paws on your body. This is normal behavior that relates to nursing; kittens knead their mothers to stimulate milk secretion. If that happens to you, it means that the cat is transferring those warm, safe feelings to you, his/her new parent. Whatever you do, don't scold or punish your cat for giving you this great sign of love.

5. Don't give up on your overtures to the cat -- brief sessions of gentle petting, and talking to him/her in a soft voice.

I wish you the best with your little friend. I hope things will work out well between the two of you.


----------



## chris10 (Feb 20, 2006)

From working at a shelter I have seen many cats. Cats have different personality's. Some came in and couldn't get enough affection and others no matter how nice to them you were they wanted nothing to do with you. Some of those unaffectionate cats later broke out of there shell but others that was just their personality. Most or these types of cats are referred to as independent cats. Its not your fault that's just the way the cat is. As primobabe said try working with your cat and see what happens. After its all said and done if your cat is the same then that's its personality. I have a cat just like yours and another completely the opposite. Good luck.
P. S. If your a person that likes to be politically correct than referring to your cat as "it" is correct and doesn't imply that you don't love your cat. Most known animal rescues us "it" in documentation, newsletters and procedures. My girlfriend has been working for an animal welfare organization for more than 2 years and volunteered for many others. Also from being involved she has read many other documents from animal organizations across the United States. Most have all used "it".


----------



## ihave4kitties (Aug 27, 2005)

Definitely cats have different personalities. I have 4 and each is different and one is definitely not very affectionate and hates being held, never sits on laps and in general is just moody and a "fraidy," cat. It was nothing I did, he's just that way....we think because he was born of a feral mother. Anyway, try not paying too much attention to your cat. Do what you need to do, feed him, cleaning the litter box and quick and gentle pets here and there, talk to him just to let him know you're there but sometimes, if we are too anxious to please our cats, or "demand" affection from them, they back off, especially if they have a more "independent" or timid personality. See if that helps. Sometimes they have to make the first moves. Try just sitting in the same room with your cat and do nothing. You also didn't say what your cat does or doesn't do. Some people think that if a cat that doesn't cuddle, doesn't like long pets, or sit on laps, it isn't affectionate. Although my Marcellus never does those things he definitely loves to rub my face with his...this is definitely a show of affection. Sometimes a cat may just want a quick pet, once or twice down the back, more than that makes them agitated. The key is to determine what your cat likes and doesn't like and respect that. In time that may change or it may not. Be patient and look for the little things...a purr here, a pet or two there, a head butt, a chirp/trill when you talk to your cat, squeezing eyes...all little things that sometimes owners miss. As far as the cats liking you when you're feeding them....that's normal. My cats really love me at feeding time. Capitalize on that, make a big deal of that and enjoy that. Feeding time is my favorite time with my cats.


----------



## adamb2k6 (Mar 1, 2006)

My 2 cats are brother and sister. I have had them since only a few weeks old. My male cat Tiger is the most outgoing cat I've ever known. He loves everyone and everything. You can pet him anywhere on his body and he loves it. He will sit on your lap no matter who you are. He will snuggle up with you when you are sleeping.. doesn't matter who you are. He constantly craves affection he just loves it and can never get enough love. 

His sister, Patches, on the other hand is very shy. She only really loves me. But she is not one for "close encounters" so to speak. If she wants to be pet, she meows at me from across the room. If I make eye contact with her, she will come close to me and put her head down as if to say "You may pet me now". I have to reach reach reach to pet her, and she moves an inch out of the way so that I have to physically move my body to reach her and pet her. But when she is being pet by me she loves it. She sleeps down by my feet on the bed at night. I can pet her anywhere I want (belly, arms, feet, nose, chin, anywhere) but I cannot pick her up or try to get her to sit on my lap for more than five minutes. She is very cautious of her surroundings. If there is the slightest noise she springs up to see where it was (to determine whether she needs to run as fast as she can into a hiding spot somewhere). When I am petting her she purrrs very loudly, but not when anyone else is petting her. Usually the only other person that ever gets to pet her is my wife, because she feeds her. But she hides from strangers (and usually my wife too). Go figure. Tiger would rub up against a burgler.


----------

