# Hi and How to make a decision to adopt a cat?



## gstefan (Jan 24, 2013)

Dear all,

I am G and I volunteered at our local Humane society about 3 years ago. Now my son volunteers there and he constantly talks about a cat he likes. It is an older cat, very nice and loving.
I met this cat last week and she is the most beautiful tabby I have seen - has amazing green eyes. I immediately felt a connection with this cat - meaning I liked her very very much.

For years in my family we have refrained from adopting a pet due to allergies to cats and dogs identified in my husband. Now, I really would like to adopt this cat and give her a chance to live in a loving and caring family. 

Despite his allergy restrictions my husband seems to be more concerned with the responsibilities that having a pet in the house brings. 

I hope you could all help us make the right decision when it comes to adopting or not adopting a beautiful cat from the Humane society.

Best regards,
G


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## Arianwen (Jun 3, 2012)

It does need to be a joint decision but an awful lot can be done with allergies.

You sound as if you would make a wonderful owner.


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## BigDaveyL (Jun 26, 2012)

Arianwen said:


> It does need to be a joint decision but an awful lot can be done with allergies.
> 
> You sound as if you would make a wonderful owner.


I agree with this. You and your son would make wonderful owners.

It sounds like your son knows about and has experience with the upkeep of animals and is willing to do it, by his volunteer experience.


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## Marcia (Dec 26, 2010)

My son has allergies, but he takes a simple over the counter allergy med when he comes to visit. He now has taken in his own stray so he must be coping ok. 
Sounds like that cat is a good match to your son and you if you are willing to help with the responsibilities. If he is old enough to volunteer, he is old enough to take care of a pet, but please be a back up - and prepare to be the forever mom if son moves out to college.


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## grrawritsjordi (Dec 29, 2012)

I have allergies and they are pretty bad. If I am around a cat, my allergies go crazy, however, I have found that I am not allergic to Moosey and Ziggy anymore because I am used to having them around. I took OTC generic allergy pills, which work great, for a few weeks, then slowly weaned myself off of them. I now only have problems with allergies if other factors are introduced, such as when I am sick. (When my immune system is messed up, my allergies come back)

If your husband is more worried about responsibility, you should let your son know that he HAS to take care of the cat and make a chart of all the things that need to be done. When I was younger my parents got so sick of us having pets that they said they would give them away to family if we didn't take care of them.

If it is the aspect of financial responsibility (vet bills, food, ect) you could always put away a little bit of money every week in a pet fund.

Good luck! I had to beg my boyfriend to adopt Moosey and now he loves her!


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## LunaTheHimmydoll (Dec 15, 2012)

Before I adopted Luna, my father claimed to be allergic to cats. I don't live with my father year-round, only visit for several weeks during the summer. Anyway, after getting Luna, it turned out to be me, and not my father, who was in fact allergic to her. I was very stressed out and upset for a few weeks while I battled hay-fever and an asthma flare-up. Thankfully, as I suspected, it all cleared up and I have developed an quasi-immunity to Luna's dander. I also purchased a True Hepa filter for my bedroom, which I probably should have had anyway, being an asthmatic. I am fine now. If anything, I have a very mild allergy to her, but nothing like it was when I first got her. I think with allergies it depends on how severe your allergies are. If you are the type of person who can walk into a home and can tell a cat lives there because your allergies start to act up, I would think twice. I have never experienced such a reaction to other people's cats. I actually might be allergic to Luna's litter...I'm not even sure to be honest. It's not like I bury my head in her fur and then sneeze or experience a skin reaction of any sort. There is not that kind of direct connection. Good luck!


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## gstefan (Jan 24, 2013)

Dear all, 
Thank you so much for the many encouraging words and advice. I am checking various sources of information now about proper caring for cats and am hoping that we would be able to adopt the cat at the end.
She is a 13.5 years old cat and I really would love for her to have a nice home for the years that she could be around us.
My husband will probably be able to take care of allergies with ITD medications. And as many of you mention, he might become immune to our cat's dander (just hoping to call her our cat), plus the coat of this tabby is so short.
He is much more worried about emotional distress, since the kitty is not a young one. He really loves animals and even at this moment he is thinking how we would love the cat and we will all get really attached to her and may be in the not so distant future (5-8 years down the road, or even less) she might no longer be with us - so he is really anxious about losing somebody he loves.
I have found in our town quite a few places/animal hospitals where they also offer support when a beloved pet is lost. Yes, our pets do become our family and such moment is difficult (we used to have a small fish that we loved). To me, all the wonderful and funny moments before that could help us cope with such a loss.
I hope I could persuade him to think more about today and the near future and enjoy having a new companion in our family rather than to think about the unclear distant future.

G


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## Marcia (Dec 26, 2010)

gstefan said:


> Dear all,
> Thank you so much for the many encouraging words and advice. I am checking various sources of information now about proper caring for cats and am hoping that we would be able to adopt the cat at the end.
> She is a 13.5 years old cat and I really would love for her to have a nice home for the years that she could be around us.
> My husband will probably be able to take care of allergies with ITD medications. And as many of you mention, he might become immune to our cat's dander (just hoping to call her our cat), plus the coat of this tabby is so short.
> ...


 I have adopted many, many old kitties in the past. Sam was 12 - had him 4.5 wonderful years. Winnie was 15 - had her only 9 months and on and on.... All my friends and neighbors think I am nuts to adopt old cats just to have them die on me so I will tell you what I tell them: _Its NOT about me, it's about THEM. It's about their quality of life for the remaining years they have left after they've been thrown away._ It's about them not lingering in a shelter because they are "too old", or not cute enough. Its about love and affection for them....... and _from_ them. 

Go ahead, take the plunge. It will be the most meaningful years of that cat's (and dare I say your) life.


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## Jetlaya67 (Sep 26, 2012)

Aww, you are so kind wanting to adopt an older kitty! I say go for it. Seems most of the problems (allergy concerns, care, etc.) are mostly dealt with. I think she still has a lot of love to give. I had a cat that lived to be 22 years old and she was healthy and in pretty good shape just until the very end. Hopefully your kitty will be with your family for a long time.


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## katehasl (Jan 21, 2013)

We adopted an older cat and had her for 3.5 years. Her loss was devastating but I would never regret having her. Those years with her were all joy. The end is sad but part of your journey together. 

As for allergies I would recommend not letting her in your bedroom and teaching her certain spaces are off limits so your husband isn't always emmersed in her dander. Wood floors help a lot too and just keeping on top of dusting, sweeping and vacuuming. My husband won't take meds but we live harmoniously despite the allergies


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## Marcia (Dec 26, 2010)

We adopted Sam at 12. His first mom died of cancer and he spent 2 years in and out of foster and adopted homes because he was so scared. It took awhile for him to warm up to me but I had 4.5 WONDERFUL years with him. He adored me and I adored him. Ove a year later I still tear up thinking about him and get a glass of wine in me and I cry like a baby - but they are tears of joy at having such a wonderful friend and devoted companion. The bottom photo is his adoption photo. He always layed down with his paws overlapping like that. What a wonderful cat he was.
I will always love him. It was an absolute privilege to be his mom for his remaining years.

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## Venusworld21 (Oct 23, 2012)

Allergies tend to decrease with age, too. When was it determined that your husband was allergic? If when he was very young, he may find that his allergies now are greatly diminished. (My mom was deathly allergic to bee stings as a kid. Had to carry an epi pen and everything. She got stung a few years ago (in her 50s now) and didn't even have a reaction. Dr told her allergies decrease with age.)


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## mumof7kitties (Jan 27, 2013)

My husband is very allergic to cats but we still have several. He just keeps the Benedryl and eye drops nearby at all times. 

We don't adopt old kitties but we do only adopt senior dogs. It is most definitely heartbreaking when you have to say goodbye, but then it's hard for me to say goodbye after a month with a foster, too. The way I see it is that the more it hurts when they're gone the more they were loved when they were here. Imagine that sweet darling getting looked over so many times because of its age and not having as shiny of a coat as the youngsters have. It blows my mind when people can surrender an old critter. Any critter really but seniors especially. 

Upkeep is minimal for kitties. As long as there's love, food, lots of fresh water and a clean litter box they're good to go. 


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