# How important is a pet (cat)?



## mhaleusa (Oct 31, 2010)

Well, I need three posts before I'm allowed to ask questions so this in part satisfies that. However, I'll ask a real question... give a real perspective anyway.

I'd be curioius to know how many cat owners out there feel like their cat are in many ways... just like their children. 

I'd also like to say that I am a psychologist by trade. I know a lot about human behavior but have to admit that at times I a very anti-human (lol) person. I am an animal lover at heart. I always say, "I'd rather spend time with my animals then people...." because our animals love is so unconditional (under the right circumstances of course...like proper care and affection.)

My cat, dog, fish, or bird have never let me down... sure there have been vet bills, times we didn't agree, and times maybe we didn't really use the litter box... but still, in the end... they are there thick and thin.

Well, hopefully this post hasn't been a waste of time. I needed another post to get my permissions and wanted to show how much I love the topic of pets and cats. Also, you may understand a little more about me and my love for my cat.

Thanks!

Mark


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## Janis (Aug 26, 2010)

Hi Mark.
I once read that cats in particular are approximately the size & weight of a baby, and that is one of the reasons people really enjoy holding & cuddling their cat. Also, my daughter, after having a cat for a couple of years, then having her own baby, replied when I commented that she didn't babytalk her cat as much, " Once you have a child, your pet becomes your pet". Of course the reverse is true when you no longer have a child at home, I have found! Your pet again becomes your child! 
Also read once that anyone intending to become a psycologist should first have two cats.


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## Susan (Mar 29, 2010)

In some ways my cats remind me of my kids when they were babies or toddlers (my kids are now adults). My cats are very dependent on me and it's nice to be needed...so I guess they bring out my maternal instincts. Muffin and Abby are also a lot of fun and very playful, and I would be heartbroken if anything ever happened to either of them. I look forward to coming home to them after work, and I miss them and worry about them whenever I have to go out of town. 

As you say, an animal's love is unconditional, provided you give them the care and attention they need to thrive, although I'm very fortunate to be able to say that such is also true for my children. All that said, as much as I love my cats, and I love them very much, it doesn't even begin to compare to how I feel about my son or my daughter. My kids are without a doubt the most important part of my life and always have been. So, as much as there are similarities, there are also many differences.


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## Mdolittle (Oct 29, 2010)

I'm with you Mark. Animals don't judge or lie.


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## Dave_ph (Jul 7, 2009)

My cats aren't my kids. I dont' like kids.

As a psychologist I think you should look carefully at anyone who has a relationship with a fish.


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

I don't know that we can explain love. I have loved cats since I was a little girl. They're soft, they purr, and pets love us unconditionally. Of course, I love my four children more, but there is always room in our hearts for love. Cats and dogs need us and love us, and people like to care for those who need them. Their company and their loyalty are worth the cost and the care.


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## Susan (Mar 29, 2010)

Dave_ph said:


> As a psychologist I think you should look carefully at anyone who has a relationship with a fish.


That was most definitely my laugh for the day!


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## Ducman69 (Aug 28, 2010)

Dave_ph said:


> My cats aren't my kids. I dont' like kids.
> 
> As a psychologist I think you should look carefully at anyone who has a relationship with a fish.


ROFL! That made my day. 

And yeah, my sentiments exactly. I am not particularly fond of subadults, and would just add that I don't believe my cat's affection to be unconditional by any means. In any case, not wired like a dog to follow his alpha into the flames.

I'm a entertainment system that they enjoy playing with, I am surely identified as a food source, I give them massages they appear to enjoy, and security. They provide me with entertainment, companionship with few strings, are soft and cuddly and I feel calmed by purring/stroking, and I feel it rewarding knowing I saved the kitties from a shelter and am able to provide them a nurturing environment. A symbiotic and mutually beneficial relationship, but not unconditional. There's probably another factor I'm ignoring though that would explain why MY cat means more to me than just some random stray on the street that might be just as affectionate.


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## fishyhelper288 (Oct 23, 2010)

Dave_ph said:


> As a psychologist I think you should look carefully at anyone who has a relationship with a fish.


 
Then I guess that means im a test subject... I bred, raised, and loved fish for years, you walk into the room, and every fish was attentive, some of them were extra friendly/trusting, of course their motivator was food, you stick your hand in the tank, they nibble at you, you make faces at them, they swim wildly back and fourth, food deposited... I don't ever think my fish loved me lmao... That would be ubserd lol....

But i think its still moderately healthy to have a relationship with a fish lol... atleast thats what I tell myself :cool

For me its the dependency part, Im here to care for said thing (plant, animal, ect) It makes me happy to do so, it occupies the nurturing part of my brain lol... Drawing/art/ect can do the same this line/form/ect is here because of me, when I nurture it, its good to me, it gives me pleasure to see it...

Im not a scicologist, but I am a watcher, and when you spend time bouncing thoughts around while humming a tune, or mucking a horse stall certain subjecs come up that you discuss with yourself...(or maybe thats just me! oh boy ) 

Consequently I do spend more time with my animals, working, and just thinking things through the whole time, than say, hanging out with friends, so the routine of comfort is there, but some times I suck at being social lol...

funny thing is, just tonight someone told me I was one of a sanest people they knew.... oooooooh if only they knew lol


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## Kobster (Feb 1, 2007)

My cats are my kids. I don't know if that would change if I had a human child, because I don't have one, and don't intend to have any. I love my cats and dog more than I've ever loved any human. What that says about me I don't know.


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## Huge2 (Jan 28, 2008)

Dave_ph said:


> My cats aren't my kids. I dont' like kids.
> 
> As a psychologist I think you should look carefully at anyone who has a relationship with a fish.


Pretty much my feelings.


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## mhaleusa (Oct 31, 2010)

Well, caring for fish is obviously not a topic for this board... but I'll tell you that some fish absolutely have personalities. Also, to keep fish in a proper manner requires a LOT of work. Perhaps that is why those of us have such fond feelings of them for without those feelings...we would not do the weekly water changes (total of over 100 gallons per week for me!)

I guess that is kind of the paradox of my statements...for as much of a "care taker" as I've proven to be... I choose not to do what most want in life, to take care of kids.

Interesting insights.... I suppose that comparing cats (or dogs or whatever) to kids is a bit rediculous at first mention. However, its the value that we assign to these beings that is the determining factor. I stand by my statement of valuing animals over people on most days! Maybe not having kids means that I can't truly make the comparison... and that is okay too.


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## SerenityFL (Oct 6, 2010)

I'm not too partial to or fond of those little people but that's mainly because of their parents, not the actual child him/herself. Kids don't know better, the parents do and many parents don't do a good job.

But they have done a great job of ensuring that I don't ever want kids.

I don't look at my pets as my children. I look at them as my friends, my best friends, really.

Unconditional love...no, there's always strings attached but, as someone said, they don't lie. They are exactly who they are and they do not apologize for it. You can either accept that or not, the choice is yours.

My cats bring me a lot of joy, (as do my dogs), and I can't imagine not having pets. It's great to come home and have a multitude of animals happy to see me. I don't care if it's because they see me as giver of food and that's why they are happy, it's still cool to come home to that.

At night, when we are all snuggled in to bed, (me with a mere sliver towards the edge, the rest of them sprawled and fully, completely relaxed...as long as they're happy...sheesh), I know there is affection from them. I have one cat who sleeps in the crook of my right arm, one cat who likes to sit near my head and chew my hair, one cat who sits on my stomach and others who will vie for position near me so as to be petted. 

They follow me everywhere, are totally interested in every. last. thing. I do. When I'm happy, they can feel it and it makes them race around the house, tails in the air, joyful.

When I'm upset, they can feel it and they lay low or as one cat does, she'll say a few words to me and come over to, what I like to think of as, comfort me.

It is very apparent that we all enjoy each others company which is why I refer to them as my best friends.

And yes, I much prefer animals rather than the company of most people. Mainly because animals make it so much easier, you can be yourself, totally, 100%, completely. There is no judgment. You accept them for who they are, they accept you for who you are. 

It's how life should be and I have a lot of respect for animals. At times I think maybe we aren't really the superior beings.


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## mhaleusa (Oct 31, 2010)

Well put SerenityFL!


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

To quote Serenity:



> Mainly because animals make it so much easier, you can be yourself, totally, 100%, completely. There is no judgment. You accept them for who they are, they accept you for who you are.


That's unconditional love.


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## Dave_ph (Jul 7, 2009)

Love is a drug. 

Sort of. 

Its a chemical in your brain called oxytocin. Cats give good oxytocin. They're furry little chemical warriors. 

""We can take a prairie vole female, inject her with oxytocin, and she'll bond with whatever male is around," Young said.

That's why women are especially susceptible to cats.

This has possibilities, beyond voles.


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## Dave_ph (Jul 7, 2009)

But they love us too. 

The reason for our pleasurable symbiosis was the simple act of stroking; it releases large amounts of oxytocin* in both cat and human*, explains Meg Olmert in _Made for Each Other: The Biology of the Human-Animal Bond_. There's even an ideal rate of stroking for stress reduction: 40 strokes a minute. 

Can you stroke your fish?


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

40 strokes? That's pretty fast petting! (Cardiovascular exercise!)


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## Dave_ph (Jul 7, 2009)

True, I haven't optimized my petting.

I guess I have to buy the book to find out how fast to chin scritch.


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## Sinatra-Butters (Aug 9, 2010)

I don't think I could ever have kids, I would love my cats more.


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

When you have a baby, the amount of love you feel is beyond description! Loving your baby doesn't mean you don't still love your pets. But the love for your own flesh and blood is indescribable. You'd give your life for your children.


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## Ducman69 (Aug 28, 2010)

Dave_ph said:


> There's even an ideal rate of stroking for stress reduction: 40 strokes a minute.


I believe thats classified as heavy petting.


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## Jan Rebecca (Oct 14, 2010)

No kids of my own but my Tuffy is definatly my baby !!


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## fishyhelper288 (Oct 23, 2010)

Many good points here 
I didn't know petting increased oxytocin for the critter too  interesting 

and yes, you can stroke a fishy  ... iiiiits just not good for them, takes off their slime coat which gives them a bad day 

I think 40 strokes no longer qualifies it as stroking, but scritching! lol


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## Sinatra-Butters (Aug 9, 2010)

Jeanie, I know the love a parent has for his or her child is incredible, I know because my parents love me like that! 

I just don't care for baby humans. If I did have one I am sure my opinion would change, and my opinions about loving my animals more would change, but for now it is just how I feel. 

It was meant to be less about not loving children and more about loving my baby kitties! 

I could talk about how much I love them all day


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## Dave_ph (Jul 7, 2009)

fishyhelper288 said:


> and yes, you can stroke a fishy  ... iiiiits just not good for them, takes off their slime coat which gives them a bad day


Plus your hand smells. Ewww.


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## Jasmina (Nov 3, 2010)

I have a baby serval, she is my first cat (woooh what a choice for a first cat), and she came home with me after I went to "just look" at a savannah cattery.

Zuri has been with me for almost eight weeks now, I have no children, but I must say I have very strong motherly feelings towards her. For example, I thought I had completely kitty proofed the house, but she found a hole under a couch once, climbed into it, and i couldn't find her. After searching the house, lifting the couches (she was INSIDE one keeping very quiet) and checking every imaginable place I could think of, I went into a complete state of panic because I couldn't find her.

I consider myself a calm and collected person, but not being able to find baby Zuri made me react the way that very much resembled my mom's reaction when I wandered off as a kid. Finally, I made myself calm down somehow and saw that a couch grew a little tail


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## WireRabbit (Nov 3, 2010)

My cats are not just my pets, there more of friends. They have there own personalities and do what the mostly want.


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## Andreya (Nov 4, 2010)

I definitely value my pets over most people.


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## SRPumps (Oct 25, 2010)

Our pets are family members. We would never leave them behind literally or metaphorically.


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## mpc15 (Nov 6, 2010)

Andreya said:


> I definitely value my pets over most people.


haha i'm with you on that one


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## McPanderson (Nov 7, 2010)

Andreya said:


> I definitely value my pets over most people.



couldn't agree more, only person I value more than my pets is my Wife. Though, I'm pretty sure she loves the pets more than me!


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## Janis (Aug 26, 2010)

An aunt & uncle, living in California, had no children but had cats. One in particular, Poochy, was particularly doted & fawned upon. When Poochy died, (this was about 60 years ago) they packed her in lime, put her in the trunk of the car, and drove cross-country to a small town in Kentucky to bury her in the backyard of our old family home. The rest of the family thought it a bit unusual, but understood their strong feelings for their cat-child. Poochy was family.


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## Tecibbar (Nov 9, 2010)

I often hear semi-feral cats howling at night or day. My first instinct is that they are in trouble, cold, or hungry, and I need to rescue/help them. Once, I discovered that the cry was a lost human child. My protective instinct disappeared immediately, I felt somewhat tricked. 

Research says cat cries imitates babies for attention, I say the reverse.


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## BarbieAnn (Nov 8, 2010)

Well said Jeanie! I have cat since I was a little girl too. Always loved them and had them up through my first year of college. I think I read all the books in the library on cat care back then and always ended up telling my vet what was wrong with the cat before he could say anything. lol! I lost my long-haired Angora Queenie to fellne leukemia. I'm finally in my early fifties and plan on adopting a kitty next month. My Mom and I went to have a peek at them last weekend at the local shelter and they had some cuties - mostly - black and white older cats and some gray/white kittens along with gray tabbies. We didn't adopt that day but discussed it at home. My Mom has had 5 knee operations - meaning artificial knee problems with a major infection once and having to have the whole thing taken out and also on dialysis three times a week. I've gone through a lot taking care of her though it all since 2007 so I think a kitten would be a very fun and relaxing pet for me, her and my Dad who really is'nt that fond of the idea when I was kidding around and mentioned I was getting kitty a few months ago. But my Mom says we will just get one and bring it home and it will end up loving it. I've already ordered the cat furniture for it off of ebay-a great deal. I'm thinking of trying to leash train it with a harness and then take it outside myself. Too many risks and hazards for our cats out there today and we value and care for them a lot.


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## Saydee (Nov 9, 2010)

Suffice it to say that there are not strong enough words in the English language to describe how important my cat is to me.


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## CatClan (Nov 10, 2010)

Honestly, I've never had and never wanted children, but hey, I'm only 24, so who knows if that will ever change. Right now, I have two cats and they are probably closer to me than anyone, even my fiance. With people, you paste a smile on and everyone takes it at face value. But cats always seem to know your moods and want to take the time to make you feel better. They are loving and there for you no matter what. I don't know what it's like to have kids, but I don't think that they could beat that. Cats love you unconditionally, and you love them the same. My experience with kids is pretty much limited to my siblings and my fiance's little boy, but they always seem to want something from you. Of course, maybe the kids I've known are just brats! LOL


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## Tephrochr (Nov 11, 2010)

I'm in my early 20's and don't really intend on having children yet for a few years. I can't imagine living without my cats - I feed them, clean up after them, cuddle them, play with them, they may as well be my children! Of course they demand less (mostly, one of them is reminiscent of a child in his constant meowing when he wants attention). 

Plus there are all the bonuses offered by other members! I completely agree with Dave on his comment about fish. On that topic I've only had two, not at the same time, and they just refused to live. It wasn't meant to be.


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## mmgirl (Nov 11, 2010)

*Animals make life worthwhile.*

I adore animals, especially mine. They make my life worth living. They are like my children, I love them, play with them, teach them things, feed them, etc. I come from a very long line of card carrying animal lovers. When I say that I would die for my babies, I mean it. And I never call them pets, I refuse to use that word, they are my babies. :love2


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## sillykitty (Nov 11, 2010)

When I was little I always looked at our family cat as another family member, like a grumpy old aunt that lived with us. Growing up with more cats over the years, the roles I've had to play and the roles they took on for me changed with each cat. As my boyfriend puts it, living with a cat is sort of like having a roommate. I think the relationships we have with our pets is dependent on just that, the relationship. Whatever you project onto them, that is going to help define how you see them, and of course their relationship with you will determine how they see you. But I must say, I too get that feeling of mothering my pets when they are sick or misbehave. Oh...and I also used to pet my goldfish


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## mrsKoach (Nov 11, 2010)

I love our new cat to bits. He is absolutely a member of our family, though my love for him will never quite be at the same level as for my children. I'm sure he'll be more of the friend type, as a previous poster mentioned, than my child.


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## herekitkit (Nov 10, 2010)

I don't want children - so I baby my cats as much as possible. I figure, if I know i'll never have a human child - no reason why i can spoil a different type of baby


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## emelvee (Nov 14, 2010)

Before I got married and had a child, I was _almost_ the "crazy cat _guy_." lol
Lived by myself and 4 cats...and 2 dogs.

Now we have one cat and a rabbit. We just got the cat a few weeks ago, and I realized how much I missed having a cat around.


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