# My big cat keeps bullying the new kitten



## mochii (May 8, 2015)

So i got a new kitten about a week ago and he's almost 3 months old. I gave him his private room for a day or two before he started wanting to explore the house and when he did he doesn't want to be locked in the room anymore. Also he's very well behaved so im not worried about letting him have the house.
He also met my big cat (2 y/o). At first the new kitten would hiss at the cat everytime they're near but my big cat was calm. Now the kitten and the cat greet each other and sometimes the big cat grooms the kitten. 
But sometimes my big cat would also bully my new kitten, im actually not sure if it's playing or bullying. My kitten doesn't seem to enjoy it tho. My cat would chase him around the house and try to bite him and whack him and stuff but he never done it in a way that makes my kitten bleed. My kitten screams like crazy whenever this happens (and when i take him to safety he keeps trying to get back to the big cat)
I want to separate them but there's no way. both cats would try to claw their way out of any room i put them in, they like having their freedom.
They are eating together and sleeping together and even poops in the same literbox most of the time. but whenever i try to get them to share a toy, only one plays at a time while the other watch.
i don't want the kitten to feel targeted by my cat. What can i do to stop the tension?


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## TabbCatt (Mar 26, 2014)

It's hard to say without actually seeing them interact in person. Cats often play fight, and chasing each other, biting on the neck, head bopping could all be signs of that. My two will wrestle with each other for a few times a day, bunny kicking in the face and ear biting, etc. They used to do that several times a day as kittens. So long as they are not screaming at the top of their lungs and no fur is flying, I don't think you need to stress.

How about incorporating hard core interactive toy like Da Bird with your two cats? Have you tried having _two_ people play with them in different rooms? A hard core session would be _at least 20 minutes_ for the adult cat, and may require 2-3 sessions/day. The kitten would need much more play sessions, and sometimes longer than 20 minutes, depending on the kitten's energy level. Unfortunately, I don't think cats know the term "sharing" at all, lol. My two only share a bed. They've never shared toys among each other, but sometimes they do take turns chasing the wand toy, Go Cat Mouse, when one gets tired out and takes a breather. Then the dominant one takes over again.


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## mochii (May 8, 2015)

hm my kitten screams at the top of his lungs but my big cat is enjoying every moment of his bullying xD. No fur is flying yet but i get worried when im at school that my big cat will go to far.
and i use every toy i have on them which is alot but my big cat is wary of my kitten and often stalks him instead of the toy.


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## TabbCatt (Mar 26, 2014)

Do you know if your adult cat was ever socialized properly when he/she was a kitten? If not, he/she may not know how to properly play with a cat at all?

When you go to school, I'd seperate them for safety if no one else is able to supervise their interactions at home. You may also have to do introductions all over again, and do so reaaaaaaaaaallllllllllyyyyyyyyyyy sloooooooooowly this time. Apparently it takes much more than 1-2 days as you had done earlier, and letting them "work it out" isn't usually the answer. Look up proper cat-cat introductions, you'll find dozens of threads.


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## mochii (May 8, 2015)

I don't know what my older cat is like when he was little, i got him when he was 1 yr and the humane society doesnt tell me anything about his past either. But i do know when i first got him he gets a little offended if i touch him the wrong way but he never try to hurt me on purpose and soon got used to being touch.

And I actually did do alot of research before getting my kitten i read Jack Galaxy's directions and many other sites on how to introduce the two cats. i was planning on having my kitten isolated and introducing them in the course of a week at least. But by the 2nd day my cat was always at the door sniffing while the kitten is always trying to shoot out of the room he was staying in evrytime i try to come in. And when i put him back in the room he'll meow at me non stop until i open the door just a little bit. Both cats seemed to want to know each other and my kitten especially wanted to explore the rest of the house. They sniffed each other and none tried to bite or hit one another, my kitten did hiss a couple of times but stopped once he got used to my cat peaking through the door. 
My kitten actually refused to eat or eat very little in those 2-3 days because i wouldn't let him out and play but once he's out he'll eat the food i put out only next to the food bowl of my big cat. if i put the food in his private room he'll only sniff it and then walk away but if i move it out to the other food bowl he'll run other and chomp it all up and my big cat didn't mind eating together with the kitten either.
I also put my big cat in the kitten's room while i let the kitten explore the rest of the house because he was begging to go out so much. but when its time to put him back in his room he started clawing at the door and pulling up chunks of my carpet. so i decided to let them play together only when im there which actually went pretty well but my kitten still doesn't want to be locked in his room everytime im away. so by about the 4-5 date i let him out for the whole day while my mums at home watching them and she didn't see much happen except they chase each other around which seemed more like playing. It just suddenly got more and more violent playing between the 2 cats and that's what im worried about. 
I want to try to reintroduce them again if thats what it takes but i know my kitten wont want to be locked away or my big cat. :\


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## ArtNJ (May 18, 2011)

Usually, kitten will be delighted to play with active big cat that wants to play. So we have to ask, whats different here?

It sounds like you may have given the kitten unsupervised roaming too soon, and the big cat may have decided to get playful before the kitten was fully confident. 

I think you can likely resolve this by backing up the train and slowing things down.


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## mochii (May 8, 2015)

Makes sense. How would I do that though? My kitten meows himself hoarse everytime i leave him in a room


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## ArtNJ (May 18, 2011)

mochii said:


> Makes sense. How would I do that though? My kitten meows himself hoarse everytime i leave him in a room


Unfortunately, this is something that vocal cats learn to do if they get a response to it. For example, if you ever let your cat outside, then you will be in for begging by the door at other times. If you arent super regular about feedings and respond to vocalization, that can be an issue as well. The only way to decrease vocalization related to a desired behavior is to never respond to the vocalization. In other words, let the kitten out only when your ready to supervise, not because its meowing. Its not easy on the heartstrings, but it does seem you need to try a reset on the introduction. 

Playing with the kitten more in its safe room should help. Possibly with the vocalization, and definitely with your guilt 

P.S. You mentioned "a room" in your post above. The kitten should have a designated safe room in which the big cat is not allowed at any time from here until the room is no longer needed for the kitten. Preferably with food, water, liter, and special one on one time from you in the room.


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## Marcia (Dec 26, 2010)

I foster kittens this age and younger and found that when they interact with my adults (especially my 18 month old Polly she will get a bit rough with them. They scream bloody murder and she backs off, looks at them and says "OH YEAH?!, well take this! and this! and this!! - I'll give you something to scream about!". If it gets SUPER rough I usually intervene but more often than not it's all fun and games with occasional hissing and running away by the babies.

Frankly I would not shut either one in a room - I'd just supervise when I can. They won't kill each other, I promise, although it may sound like it. If kitten was truly terrified he would not come near the 2 year old at all. Once he gets a tad bigger it will be more fun for the tyke.


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