# not a cat owner, probably never will be one



## juventas (Jan 8, 2012)

but I love cats! Due to various annoying family situations, I will never be able to own a cat. Although I'm a 30-year-old guy, I live with my mom, as she is needy, in financial and psychosocial respects, and she is allergic to cats. I do have an apartment that I keep just so I can go there to get away from her sometimes, but I am barely there, usually only when I have to work an overnight shift at my workplace that is super close to the apartment.

Why do I say never? Well, even though my mom is the most annoying and aggravating person I know, she's still my mom and I love her. Quite frankly, I would rather her live forever annoying the holy heck out of me than own a cat.

The great thing is I do have an apartment cat that has taken a liking to me. I can swear it has an owner (lived around here for two years, looks mighty healthy, has a shiny coat) even though apartment staff says it's a stray. Here he/she is:

















My favorite topics on this forum are the feral colony/rescue stories! I've been lurking for several months now.


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## alylynn317 (Feb 2, 2012)

That's unfortunate that you don't think you will every be able to own a cat, they are awesome creatures, and so cuddly! That cats in the pictures are very cute by the way!


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## juventas (Jan 8, 2012)

Oh sorry, it's the same cat. I don't know its gender, thus the "he/she" denotation. I call it Meowsers, the outdoor cat that wants to be an indoor cat. Sometimes it waits for me at my apartment steps.


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## Lyndzo (Dec 20, 2011)

Welcome! That cat is a cutie!


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## juventas (Jan 8, 2012)

Isn't it? I think I will just call it a "he."

BTW, any idea what it means when you walk over to a cat and he flops over on his belly? And then when you reach down to pet, he grabs your hand with two front paws and starts kicking your hand with his hind legs and biting (not enough to draw blood)? Does he just flop just for the sake of flopping but doesn't want you to touch?


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## BotanyBlack (Apr 6, 2011)

juventas said:


> Isn't it? I think I will just call it a "he."
> 
> BTW, any idea what it means when you walk over to a cat and he flops over on his belly? And then when you reach down to pet, he grabs your hand with two front paws and starts kicking your hand with his hind legs and biting (not enough to draw blood)? Does he just flop just for the sake of flopping but doesn't want you to touch?


that the cat wants to play. Just watch out for the kitty bear trap when they don't.:mrgreen:


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## shan841 (Jan 19, 2012)

juventas said:


> Isn't it? I think I will just call it a "he."
> 
> BTW, any idea what it means when you walk over to a cat and he flops over on his belly? And then when you reach down to pet, he grabs your hand with two front paws and starts kicking your hand with his hind legs and biting (not enough to draw blood)? Does he just flop just for the sake of flopping but doesn't want you to touch?


very few cats i have met actually like belly rubs, but most do the "hand in the bear trap" thing where they bite and kick your hand. I think it is partially a vulnerablilty/defense type thing and partially a play thing. It is definately not an uncommon behavior, just dont put your hand there unless you are ready to get kicked!


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## Fran (Jan 9, 2008)

Yes, it's a play invitation, but it is also a friendship and affection invitation! Those little kicks and nibbles are saying "friend and playmate - I like you!" 

And actually, you do "have a cat" in a way - it sounds like your 'apartment kitty' has made a nice bond with you exactly on his terms... 

Fran


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## Carmel (Nov 23, 2010)

I've always interpreted it as the cat saying "I like you and want attention but don't go too far," since a lot of cats don't like belly rubs; it's a vulnerable area and their automatic response is to defend it... but they aren't going all out with the biting or kicking because they don't want to hurt you. It might get more aggressive if you kept pushing it. Although, if you keep working on it and building trust the cat may eventually override its protective mechanism and allow you to rub its tummy without protest.

Hopefully one day you'll get a cat... but it seems for now you've got a buddy at least. What does your mom think of dogs? They're great too.


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## juventas (Jan 8, 2012)

Well, I've only tried to pet his belly 5 times or so. Now whenever he rolls over, I try to pet his head, which he usually doesn't mind, but he still grabs. I hope it is play time. I love it when he does it because his bites don't hurt much and I love the soft little pads on cat feet, which he won't let me touch on a normal basis. I just don't want to annoy him.

One day, hopefully I will have a cat, but it will involve a lot of money. My mom is afraid of fur, so dogs are no go. She also hates to clean up after animals. My brother and I must have been really messy kids lol.

I'm trying to work on a parrot right now, and hopefully she won't be allergic to all the dust they kick up. Of course, after a month of reading about parrots, they do seem rather intimidating to take care of.

For now, I guess it's enough to play with my little friend for an hour a day at the apartment.


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## shan841 (Jan 19, 2012)

I have a cockatiel, and he is waymore needy and messy than my cat. They get lonely very easily, and will let you know if they want attention! Parrots are even louder, but a cockatiel is loud enough to really hurt your ears. lol. The dust really is annoying too, its best to keep them in an area that isn't cluttered so you can just vacuum. When the dust gets on furniture and things it is a pain to keep clean. I love my cockatiel, but I definately have to take time away from other things to spend time just with him so he doesnt get lonely(its tough since I have to keep him away from my cat) So, I think you have a good thing going here with your apartment cat. He has a nice human to keep him company, and you have a pet to give your love too without upsetting your mom


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## Patchoo (Feb 3, 2012)

shan841 said:


> very few cats i have met actually like belly rubs, but most do the "hand in the bear trap" thing where they bite and kick your hand. I think it is partially a vulnerablilty/defense type thing and partially a play thing. It is definately not an uncommon behavior, just dont put your hand there unless you are ready to get kicked!



My cat actually loves getting his belly rubbed, he will often roll over and stretch out sometimes so I can rub his belly.. He does that 'bear trap' thing when he's playful..


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## sammy09 (Jan 30, 2012)

Your stray is really a pretty cat...too bad you can't take him!


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## Pixall (Oct 18, 2011)

shan841 said:


> I have a cockatiel, and he is waymore needy and messy than my cat. They get lonely very easily, and will let you know if they want attention! Parrots are even louder, but a cockatiel is loud enough to really hurt your ears. lol. The dust really is annoying too, its best to keep them in an area that isn't cluttered so you can just vacuum. When the dust gets on furniture and things it is a pain to keep clean. I love my cockatiel, but I definately have to take time away from other things to spend time just with him so he doesnt get lonely(its tough since I have to keep him away from my cat) So, I think you have a good thing going here with your apartment cat. He has a nice human to keep him company, and you have a pet to give your love too without upsetting your mom


Not to jump down your throat but tiels ARE parrots, they are just small ones.  Thats like saying 'Chihuahuas are friendly, but MAN are dogs friendly'. :thumb

Sounds like ya got a boy there. Me too. It does hurt your ears if they do it right up close.  My adult Amazon is quieter than my Tiel, not all large parrots are loud. Pionus tend to be very quiet birds. And not all individuals of a species are loud or quiet based on their species. 

Also, Tiels have a dust down, rather than an oil one. As do cockatoos and african greys. Budgies do not. They are way less dusty.  As are lovebirds, parrotlets, amazons... Many birds are dusty, many are not. Similar to the difference in dander/fur between a husky and a poodle. One is murder on allergies, the other is hypoallergenic.  

Birds are awesome.


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## juventas (Jan 8, 2012)

sammy09 said:


> Your stray is really a pretty cat...too bad you can't take him!


Yes, he is! Very, very cute and affectionate too. Anyone live in the Kansas City area want a cat? Haha, just kidding. I would have to check him for a microchip before I committed to something like that. I would be sad that he was gone though.



Pixall said:


> Not to jump down your throat but tiels ARE parrots, they are just small ones. Thats like saying 'Chihuahuas are friendly, but MAN are dogs friendly'.
> 
> Sounds like ya got a boy there. Me too. It does hurt your ears if they do it right up close. My adult Amazon is quieter than my Tiel, not all large parrots are loud. Pionus tend to be very quiet birds. And not all individuals of a species are loud or quiet based on their species.
> 
> ...


I was thinking about a cockatiel vs a lovebird, but I would definitely need to volunteer at the local avian rescue for a couple of months before I made a decision. As of now, I've decided that birds are a lot of work and wouldn't suit my current lifestyle.


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## BryanOwnee (Feb 21, 2011)

Never say never 
Probably in some point of your life, you will have cats.


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## Leazie (Apr 14, 2007)

"Your" cat is so very handsome. We used to have a member here who had a syphnx, which is a hairless cat. Perhaps that is a breed that would suit both you and your Mom?


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## juventas (Jan 8, 2012)

Thanks for the suggestion, but Sphynxes are not hypoallergenic. I've tried to look for one, but it looks like cats are just not bred (or can't be bred?) for hypoallergenicity. For dogs, there are a variety of them, though.

Funny thing though, is that my mom is afraid of fur so won't even consider a hypoallergenic dog, but for a "hairless" cat that she _might_ consider, it is not hypoallergenic.


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## VegetaBurger84 (Feb 7, 2012)

welcome


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## Mazz (Feb 11, 2012)

The kitty in your pics looks just like my Bella  right down to the color of his belly and shape of his head.


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