# Bye-bye baby, it's been a sweet love



## Wicked_Felina10

My precious Miss Stink,


Words cannot describe how much you meant to me. You were my best friend, my baby, my soul mate. We were made for each other and you can never be replaced. From the car ride home when you snuck your way out of the box and climbed up onto my shoulder, you owned my heart.


You had such a big personality and your mood was so clear just by the look on your face. Do you remember the first time you met your daddy? You were so jealous that you slapped him in his face! But, of course, you didn’t use your claws because you were so very sweet and gentle. I will never forget how, when I’d stand up, you’d immediately hop up onto the arm of the couch, your eyes perfectly round, so I could pick you up for a ride on my shoulder. Or how, when I was asleep, you’d reach out ever so slowly and pat my face to wake me up when you needed cuddles. I can’t believe that I’ll never again get to kiss your sweet little nose or bury my face in your soft fur. I still expect to see your precious little hands poke under the bathroom door when I go to fix my hair or hear your tiny meow greet me when I come home from work.


Just going out of town and leaving you at home made me sad. Losing you, knowing that you’re no longer here, is killing me. I always dreaded the day that you’d go to Heaven and leave me here, but I didn’t think it would come so soon. You were only 8 years old, you shouldn’t have been so sick. Please know that I did everything medically possible to try to make you better. Your little lungs just kept filling with fluid. If I could give you my healthy lungs in exchange for your sick ones, I’d do it. I’d give my life for yours. Holding you in my arms while the doctor put you to sleep was the hardest, worst thing I’ve ever had to do, but I couldn’t let you suffer and I couldn’t make you go through that alone. I couldn’t justify prolonging your suffering to postpone mine.


I thought you were getting better. Monday was almost like you were back to normal. But I know now that Monday was just God letting me spend one more perfect, snuggly day with you. I will always be grateful for that gift. So, now, I have to say goodbye, baby girl. I know you’re with Jesus now and that you’ll be waiting for me to get to Heaven so I can hold you in my arms once more. You’re my beautiful big-eyed bell flower, and Daddy and I love you so very, very much.


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## Nell

(((hugs))) So sorry for your loss. :-(


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## Malaika219

I'm so sorry for your loss. (hugs)


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## orrymain

Beautiful tribute to your beautiful girl. Hugs to you.


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## Carmel

I saw your other thread, you certainly did everything you could. I'm so sorry, she was a beautiful girl and had a great life with you. We could never have enough time with them... *hugs*


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## spirite

I'm so sorry about Miss Stink. What a beautiful cat, and what a beautiful tribute to her.


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## dlowan

It's so hard to lose them. I am glad you had such a wonderful time together.

I wish you gentle healing.


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## minikin44

So sorry! She's waiting for you now at the rainbow bridge, good as new. May precious memories bring you comfort in your grief.


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## Nan

I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful kitty!


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## Wicked_Felina10

Thank you all so much. She'll always be in my heart.


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## Arianwen

You were so right to hold your baby in your arms while she went. Her last memory of this life will be of your love and she'll hold that until you meet again.


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## Wicked_Felina10

Thank you Arianwen. That really means a lot. It was the most difficult thing I've ever done, but I wanted her to know that she didn't have to be scared because I was there and I wasn't going to let anything hurt her anymore.


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## razzle

So sorry for your loss. 

Kathy


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## LilRed

So sorry for your loss.


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## Wicked_Felina10

Thank you all. It has been a week now and while I am not feeling the shock that I was, it has turned into a deep hurt that feels like a kick in the stomach. A day hasn't gone by that I haven't thought of her or shed a tear. It almost feels like if I don't cry, I am betraying her.


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## Wicked_Felina10

And razzle, I am sorry for your loss as well. I am not sure if I'll ever completely get over it or connect with another like her.


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## SuzieeQ

Your post made me cry. She is a beautiful cat and she was blessed to have such a loving and caring "mother".


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## LaurulFeatherCat

I am so sorry for your loss. Positive energy and healing warm fuzzy hugs sending your way. Smile through your tears and remember the love you shared.


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## dweamgoil

So sorry for your loss. I know it's hard to let them go, but one day you will be together. In the meantime, she'll be waiting for you where there's no suffering or pain.


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## Wicked_Felina10

Thank you all so much for your kind words. I can't believe it's almost been a month since I lost her. As long as I focus on the good times, I'm okay, but I still can't think of her last days without getting choked up.


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## Arianwen

That won't stop completely - I can still cry over darlings that died decades ago and still miss them - but it has never diminished my love for those I have now.


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## my5kitties

Arianwen said:


> That won't stop completely - I can still cry over darlings that died decades ago and still miss them - but it has never diminished my love for those I have now.


^^This.^^

My Smokey has been gone for 22 months and I still cry over him. But the love I had for him will never diminish the love I have for my babies that were there before him (Midnight, Star and Lucky) and the baby after him (Momo).


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## Wicked_Felina10

my4kitties said:


> ^^This.^^
> 
> My Smokey has been gone for 22 months and I still cry over him. But the love I had for him will never diminish the love I have for my babies that were there before him (Midnight, Star and Lucky) and the baby after him (Momo).


I know what you mean. I have a male cat (Colonel Mustard) and having him to love has really helped me through losing Miss Stink.


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## Shannon Richey

I lost my old guy recently and he too had those days of seeming better, but in the end, his illness won and sometimes you can just tell they're so tired. Still, we never are really ready for that hole that is left when they go. So very sorry for your loss.


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## Purring_Kitties

I am so sorry.  She will be remembered and treasured forever. You gave her the best life, but now it's time to let go. Hope you feel better.


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## catztail

Your words truly capture the feelings you have for your lovely kitty. Peace be with you. XX


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## Wicked_Felina10

Thank you all for your kind words. It is so hard to believe that it's almost been 2 months. There is always an ache in my heart for her, but sometimes, especially when I lay down for the night, I miss her so badly. She was my perfect, precious little angel, and she can never be replaced.


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## Arianwen

Believe me, there is no such thing as a replacement but there is a new love waiting for you - an individual who will touch your heart chords.


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## LaurulFeatherCat

Arianwen is correct; there is never a replacement for an old friend who is gone: but there is a new friend out there waiting for you to find them and take them home and build a new and wonderful relationship. Each and every cat we meet is one of a kind, from their genetics to their experiences to their own unique physiology, never to exist again on this earth once they are gone; it is one reason why I have so many cats. Each and every one of them is an individual and I rejoice at having so many special individuals in my life all at one time.

Your grieving is still very new at only two months along; it takes quite a while for us to stop hurting so acutely for our special friends: but we never stop hurting completely, we just get used to them not being there and hurt less. I still hurt for every cat I have ever had and a little more for those really special ones. It is a small price to pay for having them in my life and for the love they showed me and accepted from me.

Hang in there. It won't hurt as badly some day; and you will be able to smile instead of cry when you think of them. And there is probably another cat waiting for you to be ready to love them as well. Time does, indeed, heal all wounds.


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## Wicked_Felina10

Thank you so much for your kind words, Arianwen and LaurulFeatherCat. I have always had a deep love for cats, and I think it's because of what you said LaurulFeatherCat... they all are such special individuals with individual personalities. My Miss Stink definitely had a huge personality!

While it is better than it was, I still have my weak moments, of course. Today, I randomly thought of the way she would snuggle under the blanket up against my belly and I completely lost it and broke down. While my friends feel bad for me, I don't think they fully understand why this has affected me so much. I lost my child, my baby girl. I am glad that there are others out there who understand and can empathize with me on this.


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## LaurulFeatherCat

Those 'weak moments' are the healing grief you are feeling and are a good thing. It says you miss her, that you loved and cherished her and she will always be part of you. It also says you are healing. Remembering is the basis of healing and all that grief will turn into fond memories in the future when the rawness of your loss is blunted.

Hang in there, kiddo. It will get better and soon you will smile fondly when you think of Miss Stink instead of cry with grief.


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