# A Prayer of Tribute for Bugs



## myfamilia (Aug 5, 2004)

_What begins on a threshold of my destinys end...ends Bugs journey, now memories, only one way can begin...._

God,
Deep down in my soul...the pain is heavy and so thick...it presses against my gut. I know it was time to let go. But not let me bury myself in so much sorrow, so that I can remember, share and smile about why I loved him so. That big eyed kitten that grew into being much more than anyone could have asked for. For all the love, the joy, the laughs and tears we made it through.....my gradittude runs deep and true, as my heart beats today because of a cat that could have only come from You. 

God... You knew what I needed, to fight for life.
All alone, scared and angry after someone told me, without some support, I'd die....I blamed You ,God......but you still knew. But, Ohh God, *howwwww????........ **how did you knowwwwwww?* 

I thought, how stupid for having gotten a cat... cancer to die by and he'll end up a stray. A pest in my way, I'll be too sick to even feed him right. No, God, I was wrong..... You weren't the reason for cancer...You were the Miracle..... You gave, to me, what saw me through. 

I named him Bugs, because his eyes were too big for his head. Then, one day, I dubbed him the Wand. He was the living magic in my life. God, You know.... he just wasn't always a cat. 

Remember the first time he slept in my bed? I'd roll over from one side and so he'd jump back over to the front side....again and again, no matter how many times, he would not sleep against my back. It was time to give in...the first game I played with him. And...my first smile. 

He never wanted me out of his sight. I'd be washing a dog in my grooming shop. Then, when done, turn around and there he'd be. Not on the ground, no he was inside of the cage where the dog was suppose to be. And if there wasn't an empty cage for him...he'd squeeze through the bars and sit inside with one of "his dogs". Poor dogs just didn't know what to do but back into the corners and, sometimes even, they'd start to shake. He grew up having mixed species characteristics....

Maybe that's why he would sit and stay.... without a single meow, by his dish, when he was hungry. No matter how long it took me, that's what he did....sometimes hours. He waited patienly, till I could get up to do it. Not once did he ever run in front of me, between my legs or pester me for a thing. He would just sit there and wait. Cats don't do that...but he did.... for more that 10 years. Until it was _his_ time to retire, and be my cat. 

He was the Wand, the only....he came from a King! 

God, from the bottom of my being, I will forever be gratefull for the gift you gave to me. Sharing my life, with him, was like nothing I have ever known. And, even though I miss him so much, thank you for letting me give him back before a second too late....and after my last second with him. 

He was, to me, as perfect as You are. He brought to me life, joy, laughs, endless hours of fun and never ending love. He taught me patients, endurance, and how to play hide and seek better than him. 
And, that it's ok to cry over spilled milk, when there is no more. 

It wouldn't be magic if it didn't disappear. 

Rest in Peace, my patient ky-kat. 

I love you.....Bugs, and will miss you forever.
:heart 
:angel


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

A lovely tribute. God bless.


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## coaster (Dec 1, 2004)

That is such a sweet prayer, I can hardly find words......


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## Leazie (Apr 14, 2007)

Heartbreakingly wonderful. Dear Wand, you were truly the hand of God.


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## Janice (Jan 12, 2007)

Awwww... what moving words. You were truely blessed to have Wand.. what a sweet baby. RIP sweet Wand....


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## coaster (Dec 1, 2004)

I just love those pictures you added. He looks like such a sweet, gentle soul.


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## Nini (May 6, 2007)

Such a beautiful boy... I am so sorry for your loss...


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## myfamilia (Aug 5, 2004)

coaster said:


> I just love those pictures you added. He looks like such a sweet, gentle soul.


Thanks Tim he was indeed, very much, a gentle soul. I miss him soooooo much.


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## melysion (Mar 12, 2007)

Bugs was such a cutie - and a very special friend


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## Janice (Jan 12, 2007)

myfamilia said:


> coaster said:
> 
> 
> > I just love those pictures you added. He looks like such a sweet, gentle soul.
> ...


Awww... I'm know you must miss him alot.  You have many beautiful memories of Bugs.... he is safe and pain free running and playing at the Bridge with all our Bridge babies.... ((((HUGS)))) to you.


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## myfamilia (Aug 5, 2004)

Never before have I felt like I do. It's not like I haven't suffered the loss of a loved one before, I just don't want to let this loss go. There is something about not letting his water bowls run dry.....and I thought I was going to take his litter box out....but I just only cleaned it out. I don't lay down in my bed, to go to sleep......I lay myself down to go cry.
A friend stopped by becuse she had heard, but thought for a brief moment while walking through the door, that it had been a cruel joke. I could see the sincerity in her body languge and her face, as she paused....then, shook it off. Then stutter over words she was usure should be said, "Ohh, wow.. it loo...I thought....I could have swore I saw Bugs sitting right there...." Right there, was right where..... he lay down and took his last breath, but she did not know that.
Last night, as I and two other friends read the paper online, I asked one of them if they'd closed the front door. I had felt a cool breeze against my calves blow under the desk, but the door had been closed....then something made me look over towards the end of my desk. The verticle blinds were moving, as if they had picked up the tail end of that same cool wind flow. We all saw it, but Chad said it was the air blowing out from the computer fan and I know he was hoping it would continue.....but it became as still as it is right now. And, I'm irritated with my own self action, after checking to see what those noises/ voices are coming from the backroom again and again. 
I don't want to hear, when someone tells me I'm not letting him rest in peace, because filling his water bowls is not letting him go!! They don't know!! Maybe Bugs doesn't want to go!!


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## DesnBaby (Apr 18, 2004)




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## gunterkat (Aug 19, 2006)

I'll ask Sam next time he visits if he can guide Bugs back to you to be a comfort and a guardian, the way Sam is for me.

I now what it is to feel such a loss, how the horribly sad and lonely blackness of it can envelope you. Don't let it!









Just know that his sweet, gentle, loving spirit will be near you. You have only to close your eyes and feel his presence.


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