# Can you "train" a kitten to be more cuddly?



## Chloe92us (Mar 16, 2014)

We've always adopted adult shelter cats, who "came" cuddly, which is why we picked them. Our 13 YO Benson is the best! The only two kittens we've had in the past turned out to be not very friendly due to being born feral). Our 8 YO son had been begging for a kitten and wasn't content to adopt an adult. 

After researching breeds, we decided to purchase a ragdoll kitten from a reputable breeder. We've had him a few weeks now, and he is exactly what we expected in most ways; he follows us around, is very docile and easy going, gets along with the other pets, greets us at the door, is always in the same room with us and is very confident. 

We also expected him to be cuddly. This he is not! He doesn't mind being picked up, but he doesn't really enjoy being pet. And if we try to put him on the sofa or bed next to us, he jumps down. It's like he prefers to be an arms length away, but always in the same room with us. He does come on the bed at night to sleep, but usually stays at the foot of the bed.

If this is just how he is, we are good with that, but if there are any ways to coax him into enjoying being next to us on the sofa or bed, that would be even better.


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## OmegaCorns (Apr 19, 2014)

Not really. And being cuddly is something he may grow into. Cats usually have a change in personality somewhere between 6 months and a year old.


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## marie73 (Jul 12, 2006)

You hit the jackpot with this kitten in every way that really matters, the cuddling may come later. My girls went through lots of phases when they were kittens. Right now, he's figuring things out in his new home. Imagine if someone plopped you down on a new planet. You'd probably have other things on your mind than hanging out with the huge monsters. :grin:


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## koshechka (Jul 14, 2013)

It may become cuddly later on or not... Just play with your kitten, give it respect, and it may become cuddly.
My Mashka wasn't cuddly at all. When I picked her up as a kitten in a shelter she pushed away from me and hid in the corner. She was my first cat, and I thought at the time she was just afraid as I grabbed her unexpectedly for her from her cage. She spent first few days under the bed, only getting out to eat and then hid again, but then she gradually warmed up. She was never cuddly, didn't like being picked up, wasn't a lap cat, but she did follow me around. Eventually, she started to lay next to me on the sofa and came to my bed at night. Gradually she allowed more and more petting and at some point started to enjoy it. She almost became cuddly by the time she was senior.

My current kittens are cuddly, my girl Gretel is a lap cat, Hansel prefers to sit next to me, but he also meows and begs to be petted, and then lies on top of me when I am in bed and tries to touch my face with his (soft) paw - both he and Gretel sheath their claws when they interact with me - and tries to "kiss" me. They are almost 10 months now (born on July 4th). When I picked them at the rescue they were a little younger than 5 months, maybe 4.5. I was first looking at a calico, but she pulled away when I put my hand close to the cage, while these guys started rubbing themselves on me. When the rescuer let me interact with them, I saw that when I picked them up they were completely comfortable and didn't even extend their claws. I hope their personality doesn't change, they are about perfect now. Very active, very playful, fast and high jumpers, are already able to open the doors by pulling and open the drawers and my shower door, but also cuddly, and so far without any behavior problems. They even came scratching post trained. I hope they don't change...

So you can tell, but probably not with the tiny kittens. Still, it's quite possible your ragdoll will start enjoying petting more and become more cuddly later.


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## MowMow (Nov 6, 2010)

There are exceptions to every breed but I'd give him time. If he's young it may be a phase. Book was always too busy for petting as a kitten. He still doesn't like being hugged and kissed the way MowMow does, but now he actually seems out attention (on his terms).

Also, as Marie said... you haven't had him long. He may still be getting used to his new home.


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## Mitts & Tess (Sep 4, 2004)

How old is your kitty?


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## Susan (Mar 29, 2010)

I also wanted a cuddly cat, did my research and adopted Muffs as a kitten. She is a purebred ragdoll. Just like your kitten, Muffs did not like to be petted and she was not cuddly. She liked to be in the same room as me and would always follow me around. And she would sleep with me at night, but always at the foot of the bed. 

Muffs is now five years old. She has changed a little bit, but not much. She likes to be petted these days, but I must go to her...she won't come to me. So, if she's lying in her cat tree, I can go up to her and stroke her around the ears and neck, but that's about it. Muffs is still definitely NOT a lap cat. She wants nothing to do with laps. She still sleeps with me, but only at the foot of my bed. Despite her lack of cuddling, I wouldn't trade her for anything. She's an absolute angel, with an extremely gentle temperament. 

Is there anything you can do? As the others have said, just play and bond with the kitten. Perhaps in time, he will become more cuddly, and perhaps he won't...but I'm sure he'll steal your heart either way.


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## Chloe92us (Mar 16, 2014)

Oh, he's already stolen our hearts and we love him to death! He is 15 weeks old. 

I don't even want a lap cat, per se. My ideal cat (who is our senior, Benson), doesn't sit on our laps, but he sits right up next to us. If I'm in my chair, he's on the arm or behind my head on the back of the chair. He sits sandwiched up to my hubby's leg on the sofa. He sleeps between my pillow and the headboard, or between my hubby and I in bed. He purrs if I look at him, lol. So, he's not a lap cat, but a right-next-to-you cat. 

That is how I expected our ragdoll to be, based on what I had read and all the research we had done. That's why we invested the money in a pure bred cat; to have a better predictor of temperament. I know personality is never guaranteed, and every person/animal is different. Like I said, we love him to pieces, but this part of him is just not what we expected.

Tonight, I lured him on to my lap with treats. He stayed for a few minutes and then sat on the arm of my chair, so that's a start!


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## Marcia (Dec 26, 2010)

Kittens are not really cuddly Í have found. Think of a 10 year old kid. Does he want to cuddle, most do not. When he is older he will discover the joys of cuddling. We had an 11 month old kitten at the shelter that just LOVED to cuddle butI found that to be rare! Most just want to play. Even my Coco at 6 years old does not cuddle unless she is tired or it's bed time. Until then it's play, play, play!! I have 4 10 day old kittens I am fostering so I plan on training them to just LOVE to be held and cuddled!!!


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## Mitts & Tess (Sep 4, 2004)

They will let you cuddle them or fall asleep on your chest or in your arms when youve worn them out playing. 

That is when I do the most socializing too. Getting them use to being kissed and handled and paws touched and all that good stuff.


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## marie73 (Jul 12, 2006)

This is the main reason why when people come on here and ask which breed is the cuddliest, or which breed is this or that, we tell them that you never know what you're going to get. Getting a purebred cat doesn't guaranty a particular trait or behavior any more than getting one from a rescue or shelter. That's not to say anyone shouldn't get a purebred, it's just not a foolproof way of getting the exact cat that you're expecting.


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## OmegaCorns (Apr 19, 2014)

I'd just give him some time. He may come around. But you may just have an odd ball ragdoll who isn't into being cuddled.


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## 10cats2dogs (Jun 16, 2013)

I agree with M&T (post #10)
After they've played and eaten, is the time for gentle cuddling!


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