# Goodbye Baby Leo



## SpaceyKP (May 8, 2010)

Leo (my little lion) 06-05-09 to 05-08-10

My poor little Leo passed away last night. Looking back, I sadly can't say I'm surprised he ended up losing his fight with a bad infection or FIP. He had ringworm when we first brought him home and it took him about three times as long to fight off than the vet expected. And, despite eating kitten food, he didn't gain weight as fast as he should have at first. (I think treats helped speed that process up eventually!) The shelter said he was about 2.5 months when we got him, but the shelter didn't know how much time he had with his mother to nurse and develop properly. 

The day I got him (the day before my birthday last year), I had gone to the shelter because my husband finally convinced me that our first cat, Widget needed a friend. Leo was the cutest little guy in the kitten room and I've wanted an orange tabby kitten ever since I was five and had to give up a stray orange tabby kitten because my mom is allergic to cats. His personality reminded me of Widget and he was all dark orange, with no white. I felt bad getting only a kitten since they get adopted easier, so I got another cat that day too, Jinx. Leo was going to be my little kitten and my birthday present and Jinx was going to be Widget's friend. Well, Widget liked Leo better than Jinx, so Jinx became my kitty and Leo was Widget's friend. But I still managed to sneak in some Leo time without Widget around though. 
He and I were hanging out on my birthday, and he sat on the couch with me, looking adorable. 









And he fell asleep in my lap that night too. He was just so tiny! He was about two pounds and maybe 7 or 8 inches long.









It took a few days to name him, but I finally decided on Leo since he was my little lion. He was growing up to be such a cute cat. He slept curled up by my head every night, until he got a little bigger and felt more comfortable sleeping at my feet with the bigger cats or sometimes on the couch with Widget. We put a collar with a bell on it so we'd know where he was and wouldn't step on him. As he grew up and got a little braver, he learned how to walk without his little bell jingling. So he'd quietly stalk the bigger cats from behind and pounce on their heads to get them playing. He just seemed to have no fear in him. We were all playing in the backyard one day, and I heard a noise and looked over to one of the trees. Leo had climbed up it, but slipped and was hanging on for dear life (two feet above the ground) with his front claws dug into the branch. When we first got him, the bigger kitties like to steal his treats. But he learned fast and would take in his treats quickly and move on towards the other cat's treats before he finished chewing his own. The other guys caught on to this though, so it would be so funny to see a black paw on his little orange heads as the big cats pushed him away without even missing a beat in getting their treats eaten. He loved to sit in my lap when I'm on the computer. He would just purr the whole time and follow the cursor around the screen, trying to catch it, until he'd fall asleep with his head resting on my arm. It was so wonderful watching him grow up from a baby as he learned so many new things. The only fear he ever showed was when we got a new dog about a month ago. He would hide under the bed a lot, and just not know what to do. But after a week or so, he started to get curious, and would get on the floor while the dog slept on the couch, sniffing out this crazy new hyper thing running through the house and eating his food. Leo would even hold his own and growl, hiss and smack if the dog got too close to the cat tower he was relaxing on. Leo certainly showed the dog who was boss. 

The last week or so Leo hadn't been feeling well. At first I thought it might have been stress from the dog, but Leo had been making very good progess in getting used to the dog, so it didn't make sense. So I took him to the vet and he ended up getting IV fluids right away and spending the day at the vet. I was a little nervous though because we saw a vet at the clinic that we isn't the vet we primarily see. The first time I saw that vet was last year, a day before my beloved dog passed away and I found out she had a heart murmur. So I just had a terrible feeling when I saw her since I had my very sick kitten with me. At first they thought it was his kidneys, and I felt optimistic that he would get better. Later that day, I was visiting him at the vet when his partial blood work came back. It showed he had an infection and his blood toxicity was kinda high. The vet told me that his diagnosis was guarded. What I don't like about her is that she didn't tell me what guarded really meant, and she said everything without emotion, just here's the facts on the blood work and he's going to get some antibiotics. I understand vets can't get attached to their patients since they lose just about all of them eventually, but this vet showed no concern for me and my feelings about my kitten being sick. Since I didn't know how to read her, I didn't know if she was optimistic or not about his recovery, so I didn't know what to expect. I got to take him home that night since she didn't know if keeping him on fluids overnight would make a huge difference at that point. And I didn't want to leave him alone all night. So he and I kicked my husband and the other animals out of the bedroom and Leo slept curled up next to me all night. Something he hadn't done in a few weeks since the dog had been allowed in the bedroom. It love when he slept like that because he would wrap his arms around my arm and hold on to me all night. The next day he went back to the vet, and I was still optimistic for him but the rest of his blood work came back and it showed that his liver was the problem. They did an X-ray that day to see what might be going on with his liver, and they found fluid in his abdomen. Thankfully the vet I normally see took over Leo's care that afternoon. I went to see Leo and they unhooked him from his IV and gave me a room to sit in and just hold him for a little while. The vet told me that it his prognosis went from guarded to poor, but I had done the best for Leo that I cold have. Since I clearly wasn't ready to let go of little Leo, he decided to keep Leo on antibiotics and fluids, since there was a small chance he had some other problem that could be treated. The vet offered to take Leo home that night to keep him on fluids and watch his progress. After the vet got him home, the other vet in the office call him and mentioned Leo could possibly have an illness that humans can catch. The vet was worried about his children and cats getting it, so I picked up Leo and brought him back home that night. The next day I was a nervous wreck. I took the day off work but I still couldn't focus on anything at home and just wanted my Leo back in my arms. All this week he had been doing better at home at night. He happily at his tuna, he came running for treats (but didn't eat any), he moved around more, sat up more instead of just laying down. I really hoped he was getting better. Friday, they did blood work to test for Tularemia, and they got some blood, but his blood pressure was really low that day. They took his IV out that evening for me to take him home and they gave me some a/d food and some antibiotics, and told me to go to the emergency hospital if I need anything. I was so scared for Leo but I really wanted him to get better. I had started syringe feeding him with the hopes that would help his liver. He struggled so much at home yesterday though. He eventually wouldn't just fight the force-feeding, he didn't even swallow the food. Without the fluids keeping him going, he just couldn't even move around very well. I spent the day with him and tried to do everything I could to make him feel better. My husband came home and looked at Leo and we had to talk about putting Leo to sleep. I never wanted to have to make that decision, but I couldn't let my little guy suffer. He didn't really seem to be in any pain, so as long as he wasn't suffering and was getting better, I wanted to help him and give him a chance to live. Unfortunately in his last hour or so, not long after our talk about what to do for Leo, he started having trouble. He couldn't breathe very well, he was crying out quite a bit, he really was starting to suffer. While I sat there along with him, laying with him on the bed, I knew what I had to do. I at least had a little time to say good bye to him, to tell him I didn't want to lose him, but I understood if he needed to let go. I got to tell him I love him, and I did my best to give him a great life. And he laid there, looking at me, with his little paw wrapped tightly around my finger. Finally, my husband and I got him ready to take him to the animal hospital. I wrapped him in a little towel and held him tight as we walked to the car. Before we even made it to the car, little Leo passed in my arms. I am thankful at least that I was there holding him, that I got a chance to say goodbye, as unprepared for it as I was, and he didn't have to go alone. Because of the severity of Tularemia in humans, the vet wanted to do an autopsy if Leo passed before the blood work came back. Since we won't get the results for a few weeks, we had to take Leo to the animal hospital anyway to keep him until Monday. So I just held him in my arms and cried and rubbed his back during our car ride. 

What hurts the most is that he was so young. He didn't even make it to a year, and there is nothing I could do to save him. He was my little baby Leo and just such a great cat, everything I had wanted in a kitten and cat. I so was not ready to have to say good bye to him so soon after getting him, and he just got sick and passed so quickly. I'm a little worried about my other cats too. They've been crying more this morning and Widget keeps looking for her little baby. Hopefully they will be okay since they still have each other, but I know for me, nothing will ever replace my little Leo. I'm going to miss him. 

When he was still itty bitty, he liked to sleep in a bowl of napkins on our table.









He was a pumpkin at Halloween but he managed to wiggle his way out of the costume.


















































































My baby Leo's last picture. RIP little dude.


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## Bruce (May 5, 2010)

What a wonderful memorial for Leo, you got me all emotional now  

But Im sure Leo is in a better place now (Rainbow Bridge)... and as I mentioned in your other post, I asked my beloved Candy to show him around at the Bridge and to share some treats with him. I am sure he is probably already pouncing around up there and enjoying the catnip grass fields atback


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## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

Oh, what a sweet, sweet kitten who was given a fabulous, if short, life with you. It is clear to me that he needed you to be able to love him so well during his short stay...you gave him a lifetime of love during that time. You did him proud and I've got sniffles and my vision is getting a little watery, you did so good for him. Every cat should be so well-loved. 
I am sorry for your loss, atback


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## marie73 (Jul 12, 2006)

Those are some of the sweetest pictures I've ever seen. I'm sure Cinderella has taken Leo under her angel wings and is showing him where to get the best treats. I'm so sorry for your loss.


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## melysion (Mar 12, 2007)

Sorry for your loss. He was a lovely boy!


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## katlover13 (Apr 15, 2008)

What a wonderful, special little cat! He was lucky to be so loved in his short life. It sounds like the two of you had a very close bond. It hurts to lose them even more when they are so young.
You did all you could for him and I'm sure the day will come when we will all be reunited with the kitties we have lost.


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## SpaceyKP (May 8, 2010)

Thanks for the thoughts everyone. It definitely helps me cope with this difficult situation. My husband and I have talked and realized with hindsight that this may have been inevitable. Leo never really got big. He grew longer but had a smaller height, girth and head than he should have. Despite eating good kitten food he didn't gain weight very quickly. He was sick or had an infection a few times in his short life and it took him longer than expected to fight them off. Even though it doesn't make this easier it's nice to know he had a good life. He could have ended up with someone who treated him well. But he also could have ended up with a family who wouldn't have cared for him as well or even gotten rid of him or put him to sleep when he was sick earlier on. It's so hard to think that such a happy, playful, always purring kitten had to leave us so early in life but I'm glad he at least had a good life while he was here with us.


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## Bruce (May 5, 2010)

I always questioned why out of all my kitties, the most dear to my heart had to be taken... but I quickly came to realize... God always takes the extra special ones first and then later the special ones atback


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## Miso (Dec 5, 2009)

I'm so sorry for your loss. atback


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

My heart goes out to you. I'm so sorry you lost your sweet kitten. God bless and comfort you.


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## SpaceyKP (May 8, 2010)

Thanks for you condolences Jeannie. 

Our local shelter and humane society are having a two-day adoption event from midnight June 4/June 5 straight through to 5pm June 6. It just dawned on me today that June 5 would have been Leo's 1st birthday. Even though Leo isn't here anymore, I'm glad I'll be spending most of his birthday volunteering to help 300 other animals find a forever home.


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