# Do Dieing cats seperate



## phisigjuliet269 (Feb 27, 2010)

Hey All,

I was just curious as to whether anyone has ever been in my situation.

My 5 year old cat has Cardiomiopathy and she is dieing. She is still eating, drinking, and being social so the vet and I have decided to wait to euthenize her since she still has quality of life but her condition is being monitored and I am prepared to help her along as soon as she stops eating or has other symptoms that the vet and I discussed.

Anyway today she has been distancing herself from me. Lately, she has been laying in my bed all day and hanging out with me when I am in the living room or in my room. Today she was sleeping in my closet on my clothes and then after dinner she went into my mom's room and only wanted to lay in their bed. She seemed to not want to be around me but she has no problem snuggling with my parents which she usally doesnt do.

Basically I was curious as to whether my cat is distancing herself from me or if she just wanted a change of scenery and possibly is sensing my stress and just taking a break from me. My mom thinks she is distancing herself from me so that she can pass on her own terms.

Any thoughts?


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## marie73 (Jul 12, 2006)

I am so sorry you're going through this. atback


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## doodlebug (May 13, 2006)

I'm sorry to hear about your poor kitty, I know how hard this can be.

Cats in the wild do pull away from their colony and will go off to die by themselves. They know they are sick and can't defend themselves so they hide. They don't want to show weakness or draw predators to the area. So this is an instinctual behavior that many domestic cats will exhibit. In her way, she's trying to protect you.


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## Bethany (Jul 19, 2006)

I think it varies from cat to cat.

We had two cats when I was growing up. Smokey died a few days after I went back to college after Christmas break. That last night before I left she insisted on sleeping on the foot of my bed, even though she hadn't even gone upstairs for months and hadn't slept with me in YEARS. So it really felt like she knew it was time, she knew I was leaving, and that saying goodbye was really important to her.

Farrah, on the other hand, was desperate to get outside. She'd been an indoor-outdoor cat when younger, but had been indoor-only for several years because of her age. Finally my parents broke down and let her out, figuring she'd only sniff around the yard for a little. Instead she went straight out of the yard -- something she hadn't done for years -- and died. Again, it seems like she knew it was time and for some reason instead of lingering for goodbyes she preferred to do it outside and privately.

Man, this is going to be a depressing thread, isn't it? I may need to quit reading.

I think it could be that she's drawing away because she senses it's time to go. It may also be that, for whatever reason, she thinks she hasn't spent enough time with your parents and wants to say goodbye a little. 

But any way... I'm so sorry. This is the part of having a pet that really sucks. :-(


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## phisigjuliet269 (Feb 27, 2010)

Thank you everyone. Sorry to depress you all.

Yea this is def the worst part of owning a pet, saying goodbye.

This morning she was hiding in their closet, but she snuggled with my dad all night. I went to give her medicine and she was sitting on my lap purring away, however she still doesnt want to come into my room which I won't lie is making me a little sad since I am her mother. Luckily, my older cat is laying with her on the bed now and they are snuggling. 

I am still torn on what to do with her, I know its coming down to the end, but she is still purring, eating, & drinking. I am worried I am going to take her to the vet and she is going to be rubbing all over everyone looking fine, ( she did this last week when I brought her in for a check up after I told the vet how lathargic she was) the vet who I speak with every few days just keeps telling me the day she stops eatting is the day I should put her down. 

I am just alarmed by the slight withdrawl from everyone, she never hides in the closet. Ugg!


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## brittanymuldowney (Feb 24, 2010)

I'm so sorry you're going through this. This is the absolutely worst part about forming a bond with an animal  
Do you think its possible you are distancing yourself too? (Not to say you aren't giving her attention) Sometimes when we know someone is going die, we prepare ourselves by distancing emotionally so we don't feel as much pain when the time comes. I know this sounds cold, but its just a defense mechanism that we unconsciously use. When I left to live on my own, I had to leave my cat that was my best friend for 7 years. Instead of confronting how I upset I was, I just distanced myself to try to ignore how much I missed her. In the end, I completely broke down and convinced my family to let her come live with me. Because I have never had a pet that had a terminal disease, I've never been in your situation. I've only experienced the sudden, unexpected death of a pet. I really hope everything works for the best.


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## phisigjuliet269 (Feb 27, 2010)

Yea she is still grooming herself and her hair is still looking great.

The only real issue is her urinating out of the catbox. Her lasics make her urinate out all the excess fluid so she wets in some places but its more water not really pee. She does still use the catbox too but I have woken up wet a few times which is not fun.

I havent distanced myself at all I have been actually trying to spend more time with her, I kinda feel like she is taking a break from me because I have given her to much attention and she is annoyed by it lol. I pretty much know where she is at all times and when I am not home I will call in and check on her lol.


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## puckerbrush (Dec 31, 2008)

I had a cat die from heart failure due to hypertrophic cardiomyopathy. It was heart wrenching to say the least and I'm so sorry you have to experience as well.

I noticed a few days before I had to let D'Artagnan go that he did distance himself from me. He stayed in the basement all night on a Thursday which he never did and that next day I took him to the vet because he had labored breathing. They removed 3 liters of fluid from his chest (I could be remembering that wrong but that is the amt I remember) and then the next day he crashed and I had to take him to the emergency vet to end his suffering. I was so terrified I would have to make a decision without knowing if it was the "right time" but D'Ar let me know he was ready to go.

Hold your kitty tight and if you think of it, take some pictures. I took pictures of D'Ar a few weeks before he passed, things like the tip of his tail or the bottom of his feet . . . and I'll always treasure those pictures. *big hugs* atback


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## brittanymuldowney (Feb 24, 2010)

You sound like a really caring owner. I really hope she starts seeking attention from you before she passes away. It could be that since you are giving her so much attention, she doesn't see the need to seek you out. Maybe she feels she can always rely on you being around that she's extra comfortable!


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## phisigjuliet269 (Feb 27, 2010)

Puckerbrush that is exactly what my cat has. We had to have fluid taken out of her chest back in October and she was fine after that, until recently. :x 

My heart is breaking right now she is hiding in the closet in a hamper curled up in a ball. I dunno what to do. She ate a full dinner and was drinking fluids all day. I don't just want to put her down because I know she is going to die but she never hides like this so I know this is a sign that this is the end. I don't want her to die alone in the closet but when I take her out she just acts like I am bugging her and she goes back to sleep on the bed or she goes and sits and cleans herself. She isn't acting like she is in pain and her breathing is fine. The vet said she would stop eating or become to weak and those would be my signals. I am going to let her stay in the hamper for a while and then bring her in my bed for the night and see what happens in the A.M.

Do you think she will suffer if she just passes in her sleep? Obviously I don't want her to be in pain but I am not sensing that she is but that she just wants to do this on her own terms. :x


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

It has been my experience that very ill cats just don't want to be bothered. They tend to want to be under something, or just away from the family. I am so sorry you're going through this. I know your pain. God bless. It's terribly hard to say goodbye.


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## puckerbrush (Dec 31, 2008)

I hate to say this but dying from heart failure is not a pleasant way to go. I think if she died on her own, she would be suffering a bit. The chest fills with fluid and well . . . I won't go into details, I'm sure your vet has discussed this with you. My cat D'Ar did stop eating and drinking on that last day and his behavior became strange, he kept trying to run away from me but eventually was so weak his hind end was wobbly. When we drove to the vet he became very peaceful and curled up in my arms. Every cat is different and you know your cat best. I wanted every last day and moment with my cat and I was very blessed he let me know when he was done fighting. Just measure your precious kitty's quality of life with the moment. Take some pictures and give her lots of kisses. But don't keep her too long on this earth if she wants to go. My thoughts are with you. atback


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## phisigjuliet269 (Feb 27, 2010)

Thank you everyone for your support.

It's with a broken heart that I sadly must report, Smalls took a turn for the worst last night she went and layed by the back door. This morning I did the right thing and peacefully had her put to sleep. I held her and said my goodbyes as she drifted off to peaceful sleep. We buried next to my dog who passed away so she wouldnt be alone. The vet gave us her paw print which I am going to put into a fram.

I miss her already and I hope she made it over the rainbow bridge...... :x


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## marie73 (Jul 12, 2006)

Oh, I'm so, so sorry for your loss. It sounds like your timing and intuition were right, though. atback


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## Jeanie (Jun 18, 2003)

God loves his little creatures, and I'm sure He'll welcome your little friend and surround him with love beyond our comprehension.


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## puckerbrush (Dec 31, 2008)

I'm so sorry  I know exactly how you feel. I'm so thankful the vet gave you an imprint of her paw. The emergency clinic I took D'Artagnan to when he passed did the same for me and I keep it in my wallet. It is a very caring and special thing for them to do. It was also a very caring and special thing for you to let your precious girl go. My thoughts are with you.


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## Heidi n Q (Nov 22, 2006)

phisigjuliet269 said:


> Thank you everyone for your support.
> It's with a broken heart that I sadly must report, Smalls took a turn for the worst last night she went and layed by the back door. This morning I did the right thing and peacefully had her put to sleep. I held her and said my goodbyes as she drifted off to peaceful sleep. We buried next to my dog who passed away so she wouldnt be alone. The vet gave us her paw print which I am going to put into a fram.
> I miss her already and I hope she made it over the rainbow bridge...... :x


Oh, I have tears in my eyes for you, your family and Smalls.  *_closes eyes to send good thoughts and soothing wishes_*


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## StitchyKitty (Jan 3, 2010)

I've never read a complete thread with so many tears in my eyes. 
I'm so sorry for your loss. You did the right thing in letting her go though, that way, she didn't have to suffer. From what I've read, and from what you've told us about your kitty - it sounds like her time on earth was everything it should have been and more. You cared for her and did everything you could for her. Just remember all the good times you had with her. It was very nice of your vet to give you an imprint of her paw. When our dog, Shorty died, the vet we had gone to all of his life donated quite a bit of money to a Vet college, and then donated some more money to a Humane Society. They sent us a letter, by mail informing us about what our vet had done.


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## ChelleBelle (Sep 14, 2009)

I'm so sorry she got so bad, but at least you showed her all your love for her by making that decision for her. I had to do it twice in my life so far, and it hasn't gotten easier. But, it's one of the most unselfish things we could ever do for our companions that give us so much love.

'Chelle


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